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1st RE appointment (EXTREMELY long & rambling)

OrangeCrush9OrangeCrush9
in TTC After a Loss

In case anyone is interested, here's what went on today with my first RE appointment:

Only 6 vials of blood - testing for blood type, clotting disorders, and hormonal issues (prolactin, thyroid, and progesterone).  We're foregoing karyotyping because RE says (a) odds are that is not the problem, (b) if that is the problem, 1 out of 3 times we'll have a successful pregnancy, (c) if that is the problem, there is nothing he can do to fix it, and (d) it would cost $3200 OOP.  One week after my first period he'll do the SHG ($360).  Hopefully at that point (only one cycle post-second-loss!) he will have results from all the blood tests and will be able to tell us we can go ahead and start trying again.  No matter what, I'll be on progesterone supplements starting 3 DPO through the end of the first trimester.  Hopefully we either find the problem and fix it, or we find it's unexplained and that 70% success rate works out for us (although 85% didn't work out so well - twice - so I'm skeptical).  I asked about insurance - I have fertility coverage, but not "infertility" coverage - and he was insistent that my diagnosis is "recurrent miscarriages," NOT "infertility."  I realize the difference may be a fine line, but I appreciated hearing someone (besides me) refuse to label me "infertile."  And I DEFINITELY appreciate that his distinction may mean the difference between insurance benefits and none.

Anyway, I feel better than I did yesterday, which was the goal.  Free valet parking was a plus.  The only downer is he said "no exercise" if I get pregnant, at least until the second trimester, at which point my OB has the final say.  He apparently places stock in the European tests that show a correlation between exercise and miscarriage - I previously thought these studies were a crock of sh!t, but he's the expert, so I will take his advice and stop my daily running/boxing/pilates/weights for 12 weeks if that's what it takes.

I did ask if there is anything DH/I should do in the meantime.  His response was for me:  Keep taking PNV, and live a healthy lifestyle.  No need to chart (I am not sure how he expects me to know when I am 3 DPO otherwise, as I have never gotten an positive OPK, so I do plan on charting for that purpose).  For DH:  Don't eat lead paint, and live a healthy lifestyle.  I think he can handle that. 

I think that was about it.  I feel good.  I feel hopeful.  I feel re-energized about the whole process.  Before I felt like I wasn't sure I could handle even one more loss, but now I feel like however long it takes and however hard it is, I WILL have a healthy baby, and it WILL be worth it. 

I am glad DH went with me.  Usually I like to handle difficult things by myself, but I am glad/relieved he is involved and I don't have to fill him in.  And I finally feel like we are going through this together.

One last thing - I told my mom about my losses last Wednesday, and I am so glad I did.  She has been really supportive and informative, and it has just been really nice to have a woman to talk to (IRL).  She also encouraged me to tell my dad, and the hug he gave me alone made it worth it.  I love my parents.

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