Never punish for potty accidents?

CleoKitty · April 2010

I know that the general thought is that potty accidents should never be punished. However, what about when they're not accidents and are instead done very intentionally? (ie: Kid is mad about something, so kid stomps her foot, lifts up her dress and pees on your shoe right in front of you, much like a dog marking his territory, LOL.)

Is a time-out appropriate or does this still fall under the realm of never punishing for an accident?

DandelionMom · April 2010

LMAO, I've never had that happen! Probably time out for rudeness? And have her clean up the mess? The problem with punishing for potty stuff is some kids will try to stop going and end up with infections.

EliseB0323 · April 2010

That's not an accident --it's inappropriate behavior. I vote time-out.

Ilumine · April 2010

This would be one of the ONLY things that COULD (not saying that I would) give a spanking for.

But since this is not an accident, but an act of defiance, time out is appropriate.

Just stress that she is being punished for the defiance part.

KoriBrett · April 2010

To me the key word is accident. That wasn't. I'd do something, make her help clean it up maybe?

DaiLyght · April 2010

That's not an "accident"

belle204 · April 2010

Oh, hell no. That's an ass whoopin'.

DaiLyght · April 2010

belle204:
Oh, hell no. That's an ass whhopin'.

I love you belle

xbrooklyngrl · April 2010

ditto everyone else. They have to help clean up and time out or something taken away.

Alibabs · April 2010

EliseB0323:
That's not an accident --it's inappropriate behavior. I vote time-out.

This! I'd be livid!!!!

belle204 · April 2010

DaiLyght:

belle204:
Oh, hell no. That's an ass whhopin'.

I love you belle

Stick out tongue Back at you.

karatechrissy · April 2010

A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

DaiLyght · April 2010

karatechrissy:
A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

Just a second before I get upset - do you actually have any kids yet or are you PG with your first??

DandR · April 2010

karatechrissy:

A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! Hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (don't scare the troll away girls.....)

emilykristene2006 · April 2010

karatechrissy:
A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

Wow! Really?

So Long Astoria · April 2010

LOL, didn't the girl in the Exorcist do this at a party her mom was throwing.

Maybe she's possessed.

But, I agree with PP's...if it's intentional, at the very least a time-out should be done.

Zenya · April 2010

karatechrissy:
A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

BWAHAHAHAHA. That is seriously the funniestshit I've read on here in a LONG time.

kellilea · April 2010

Time out is totally appropriate since it's clearly not an accident. I'd also make her clean it up (with help, if needed).

What an evil little genius!

ebaier · April 2010

karatechrissy:
A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

Can't wait until you have to handle your first temper tantrum!!!!! I hope it is right in the middle of grocery shopping with a full cart!

jennigator3 · April 2010

belle204:
Oh, hell no. That's an ass whoopin'.

Hahahahaha! I love this answer, I almost spit out the water I was drinking all over my keyboard!

ali_bl-nov05 · April 2010

karatechrissy:

A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

Oh my... maybe she neglected to mention that she personally knows the OP and her kid and the particular situation, cus if she doesn't she is just plain judgemental.

LanaM · April 2010

I was angry at Ethan when I kept telling him to go use the bathroom and he insisted he did not need to while he was watching tv. Next thing I know, he is standing and peeing right in his pants.... I did not exactly punish him, but made him help me clean up and was angry at him. He was 4.5 and pt'ed for two years by then.

CleoKitty · April 2010

ali_bl-nov05:
karatechrissy:

A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

Oh my... maybe she neglected to mention that she personally knows the OP and her kid and the particular situation, cus if she doesn't she is just plain judgemental.

Ha ha.

Just went to run a few errands and came back to this, LOL.

Nope, don't know her. At all. Nor does she know that my shoe-pissing dd is actually quite young. Is peeing on a shoe okay? Of course not. Does it mean that my 26 month-old is doomed for reform school? I hope not... ;-)

Littlejen22 · April 2010

She is a SM and I am pretty sure she has custody of the kids so she does have experience. That said, I do not agree with her comment on THIS at all.

Topper30 · April 2010

Wow, I wouldn't know how to react I think because I would be pretty shocked. I guess a time out? I almost feel like at that point the situation got so heated that a time out is going to get kind of weird. You need to change them, get new undies, clean up etc. Then time out? We had had issues getting dressed before and I want to do a time out but she's naked and I'm thinking... if I put her into time out naked, that's weird. lol

I found that when my DD became defiant about getting on the potty (knew how to but just didn't want to, even when it has been a few hours). I would just allow her to say no, BUT stop everything until she sat. So "OK, you do what you need to do but, no XYZ until you do." So, no crafts, no snacks, no movies, no books etc. until they go? I tried to be nice about it. Life gets better once you go.

WBs_Bride · April 2010

karatechrissy:

A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

OMG. I chuckled when I read the post itself (sorry Cleo--I can imagine you weren't laughing at the time), but when I got to THIS, I actually LOLed.

heather_09_15_07 · April 2010

Rub her nose in it. Duh.

hterry85 · April 2010

What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

CleoKitty · April 2010

WBs_Bride:
karatechrissy:

A child that would dare do that, clearly has absolutely no respect for that parent. Obviously that parent hasn't done much of ANY disciplining to that child for her to think it's acceptable or okay to display that kind of behavior. Bad parenting breeds this kind of behavior...

OMG. I chuckled when I read the post itself (sorry Cleo--I can imagine you weren't laughing at the time), but when I got to THIS, I actually LOLed.

Actually, I was laughing. ;-)

And FWIW, her little butt was already sitting in time out when I originally wrote this post. I had already made my decision on what to do with her, was just curious after-the-fact what other people would've done.

CleoKitty · April 2010

hterry85:
What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

See my above post.

I had already decided her scrawny little rear end needed some cooling off time. She was already sitting in time-out when this was written. Thanks for your concern though.

hterry85 · April 2010

CleoKitty:
hterry85:

What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

See my above post.

I had already decided her scrawny little rear end needed some cooling off time. She was already sitting in time-out when this was written. Thanks for your concern though.

Hey look, your bike is pedaling backwards!

Marce921 · April 2010

I have a hard time with this "rule" as well. DS peed in his pants for DH twice one day and when DH asked why, he said, "because I thought it would be funny." He got punished. If I was home, the same thing would've happened. I think in your situation, I would punish as well, it's intentional and not truly an accident.

DandelionMom · April 2010

hterry85:
CleoKitty:
hterry85:

What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

See my above post.

I had already decided her scrawny little rear end needed some cooling off time. She was already sitting in time-out when this was written. Thanks for your concern though.

Hey look, your bike is pedaling backwards!

Hey look, you can't read if that's what you got out of this post!

hterry85 · April 2010

DandelionMom:
hterry85:
CleoKitty:
hterry85:

What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

See my above post.

I had already decided her scrawny little rear end needed some cooling off time. She was already sitting in time-out when this was written. Thanks for your concern though.

Hey look, your bike is pedaling backwards!

Hey look, you can't read if that's what you got out of this post!

I can read the OP, where she said this:

"Is a time-out appropriate or does this still fall under the realm of never punishing for an accident?"

So either a) She really was questioning it or b) it was simply an AW post, in which case it should have been titled - AW: I can't believe my kid just did this!

Take your pick.

DandelionMom · April 2010

hterry85:
I can read the OP, where she said this:
"Is a time-out appropriate or does this still fall under the realm of never punishing for an accident?"

So either a) She really was questioning it or b) it was simply an AW post, in which case it should have been titled - AW: I can't believe my kid just did this!

Take your pick.

It was a discussion starter.

eclaires · April 2010

hterry85:
DandelionMom:
hterry85:
CleoKitty:
hterry85:

What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

See my above post.

I had already decided her scrawny little rear end needed some cooling off time. She was already sitting in time-out when this was written. Thanks for your concern though.

Hey look, your bike is pedaling backwards!

Hey look, you can't read if that's what you got out of this post!

I can read the OP, where she said this:

"Is a time-out appropriate or does this still fall under the realm of never punishing for an accident?"

So either a) She really was questioning it or b) it was simply an AW post, in which case it should have been titled - AW: I can't believe my kid just did this!

Take your pick.

Oddly enough, this is a Parenting board, and sometimes, occasionally, we are interested in Parenting topics. Perhaps Cleo wanted to know what others would have done w/out biasing the question w/ what she did. It is an interesting discussion after all.

BTW, thanks for being the title police! Can we all PM you before we post with our suggested post titles?

Marce921 · April 2010

hterry85:
DandelionMom:
hterry85:
CleoKitty:
hterry85:

What the child did does not NECESSARILY make me give the side to ones parenting skills. But questioning whether is deserves punishing sure does. But what do I know, up until two months ago I was merely a step mom. Oh, that?s right. I know that this deserves punishing.

See my above post.

I had already decided her scrawny little rear end needed some cooling off time. She was already sitting in time-out when this was written. Thanks for your concern though.

Hey look, your bike is pedaling backwards!

Hey look, you can't read if that's what you got out of this post!

I can read the OP, where she said this:

"Is a time-out appropriate or does this still fall under the realm of never punishing for an accident?"

So either a) She really was questioning it or b) it was simply an AW post, in which case it should have been titled - AW: I can't believe my kid just did this!

Take your pick.

Wow, I can't wait until your baby gets to the tantrum throwing phase. You sound like you need a reality check. Sh!t happens (well, in this case pee) and you deal with it, but sometimes it's nice to know what others would've done. She probably didn't say that she put her in timeout, because she didn't want to get flamed for it, so simply asked for other people's opinions.

hterry85 · April 2010

BTW, thanks for being the title police! Can we all PM you before we post with our suggested post titles?

You may. You see, Krissy is the god of parenting skills, and I am the god of title posting. The blended family board is really more like Mt Olympus.

emilykristene2006 · April 2010

hterry85:
I can read the OP, where she said this:

"Is a time-out appropriate or does this still fall under the realm of never punishing for an accident?"

So either a) She really was questioning it or b) it was simply an AW post, in which case it should have been titled - AW: I can't believe my kid just did this!

Take your pick.

Well now. Posting on a board you do not frequent and telling us how to title our posts? We do not care how you run things on your board. Back off.

eclaires · April 2010

hterry85:
BTW, thanks for being the title police! Can we all PM you before we post with our suggested post titles?

You may. You see, Krissy is the god of parenting skills, and I am the god of title posting. The blended family board is really more like Mt Olympus.

AWESOME. I hope you both grace us with your god-like presence more often.

SherbieKun · April 2010

I can't call that one a back pedal. When my DD bit me she got put in time out and I asked for advice on 12-24 later about what they would do. Lots of different perspectives is not a bad thing. Especially when it comes to kids. Doesn't mean you are going to do anything different- it's just a sounding board.

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