My two cents about CIO posts

SamsMom91 · March 2010

I just posted most of this on the CIO post below, but I'm frankly so annoyed with Bump CIO posts that I'm finally putting my two cents in--

Take a research methods class in college. You'll learn about variables in a study. There are independent and dependent variables. Variables are things that could affect the outcome of your study. In order to have the most effective study possible, the researcher must "control" (account) for all variables in the study.

Now, tell me this, when a physician or some child development expert looking to sell a book comes out and says "Oh no, don't let your infant CIO--they'll grow up to be distrusting adults," how exactly do they come to that conclusion? Because the parent sleep-trained with CIO methods? What if the child was exposed to second-hand smoke? What if the mother used crack while pregnant? What if the child watched their parents constantly fight? I'm just using made-up examples here--but I guess my point is, how in God's creation can a doctor or child development specialist point to CIO as the reason an adult might grow up to be distrusting of others? Couldn't some other factor have played a role in that development of distrust? We'll never know, will we? Studies involving people are impossible to 100% control because each person is so unique. You CANNOT simply say A causes B in a study involving people. There could be so many other factors that played a role in A and B.

Parenting is COMMON SENSE, people. If your baby is CIO to the point of gagging on puke, jeebus, go get the kid and clean up the puke. If they're fussing and crying and needs are met, etc. and there's no emminent harm to the child, leave them alone or employ whatever sleep training method you wish to use. Use your experiences and instincts and quit relying so heavily on everything you read in the book du jour.

Vent over.

mavilabride · March 2010

Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?

juliane2004 · March 2010

beckypooh03@yahoo.com · March 2010

AMYfromKY · March 2010

mavilabride:
Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?

"If they're fussing and crying and needs are met, etc. and there's no emminent harm to the child, leave them alone or employ whatever sleep training method you wish to use."

I think she includes about everyone in that statement.

ChelseaC630 · March 2010

stephanielynn33 · March 2010

Yes

SO and I just had a convo this weekend about whether a person's temperament is hard wired in them, or it's instilled because of their environment (nature vs. nurture). We both agree it's some of both, but I'm hoping it's more nature b/c Mina has such a calm/happy personality right now, I'm hoping for it to stick! Stick out tongue

SamsMom91 · March 2010

mavilabride:
Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?

Yes, I suppose that's true. And perhaps I am guilty of stereotyping, but in my experience, people who advocate against CIO argue that CIO could cause some permanent damage to the child's psyche. My point is SHOW ME THE PROOF. They simply can't and if they try, I'm throwing the term hogwash back in their face. Show me that some other factor didn't cause that psyche damage first.

smilelari · March 2010

SamsMom91:
mavilabride:
Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?
Yes, I suppose that's true. And perhaps I am guilty of stereotyping, but in my experience, people who advocate against CIO argue that CIO could cause some permanent damage to the child's psyche. My point is SHOW ME THE PROOF. They simply can't and if they try, I'm throwing the term hogwash back in their face. Show me that some other factor didn't cause that psyche damage first.

On the flip side, those that argue for CIO tend to argue that not doing sleep training will lead to life long sleep issues, which would just be another sort of permanent damage to the child. There is no proof of that either

SeaMama · March 2010

mavilabride:

Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?

Yes

bim38106 · March 2010

smilelari:
SamsMom91:
mavilabride:
Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?
Yes, I suppose that's true. And perhaps I am guilty of stereotyping, but in my experience, people who advocate against CIO argue that CIO could cause some permanent damage to the child's psyche. My point is SHOW ME THE PROOF. They simply can't and if they try, I'm throwing the term hogwash back in their face. Show me that some other factor didn't cause that psyche damage first.
On the flip side, those that argue for CIO tend to argue that not doing sleep training will lead to life long sleep issues, which would just be another sort of permanent damage to the child. There is no proof of that either

anyone who takes it to either extreme is obviously narrow-minded and hasn't done their research.

But, sleep is important regardless of how you achieve it. "Sleep is important for physical recuperation, physical growth, the immune system, brain development, learning, memory, and information processing as well as many other systems of the brain and the human body."

We tried everything for DD1 and nothing worked but CIO finally at 9 months. I didn't want to do it, but she was so sleep deprived, the difference in her was amazing once she started sleeping better. I'm so thankful we won't have to sleep train DD2!

OP, I totally agree with you. Too many people on the Bump make CIO seem like you're an evil neglectful parent and that's just not true. People are SO tame about it now then when I was first on these boards with DD1. Just let people parent! Unless their child is in harm, WHF cares

SeaMama · March 2010

SamsMom91:
mavilabride:

Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?

Yes, I suppose that's true. And perhaps I am guilty of stereotyping, but in my experience, people who advocate against CIO argue that CIO could cause some permanent damage to the child's psyche. My point is SHOW ME THE PROOF. They simply can't and if they try, I'm throwing the term hogwash back in their face. Show me that some other factor didn't cause that psyche damage first.

You also can't prove that CIO doesn't do harm. There are some people who aren't willing to take the risk - which is their right. Without being attacked for it.

sila129 · March 2010

I agree. my little brother was extremely colicky (i'm talking screamed all day long) for eight months straight. I don't think we have one picture of him as a baby where he's not crying. My other brother and I were toddlers so my mother had a lot on her hands. She told me she let him CIO b/c there was seriously NOTHING else to do.. My brother graduated salutatorian of his college class, is supporting himself, and is currently training with the navy seals.. and he's only 25 years old. Apparently CIO didn't have an effect on him..

mrsbird1129 · March 2010

bim38106:
smilelari:
SamsMom91:
mavilabride:

Couldn't the same argument be used to defend anti-CIO supporters?

Yes, I suppose that's true. And perhaps I am guilty of stereotyping, but in my experience, people who advocate against CIO argue that CIO could cause some permanent damage to the child's psyche. My point is SHOW ME THE PROOF. They simply can't and if they try, I'm throwing the term hogwash back in their face. Show me that some other factor didn't cause that psyche damage first.

On the flip side, those that argue for CIO tend to argue that not doing sleep training will lead to life long sleep issues, which would just be another sort of permanent damage to the child. There is no proof of that either

anyone who takes it to either extreme is obviously narrow-minded and hasn't done their research.

But, sleep is important regardless of how you achieve it. "Sleep is important for physical recuperation, physical growth, the immune system, brain development, learning, memory, and information processing as well as many other systems of the brain and the human body."

We tried everything for DD1 and nothing worked but CIO finally at 9 months. I didn't want to do it, but she was so sleep deprived, the difference in her was amazing once she started sleeping better. I'm so thankful we won't have to sleep train DD2!

OP, I totally agree with you. Too many people on the Bump make CIO seem like you're an evil neglectful parent and that's just not true. People are SO tame about it now then when I was first on these boards with DD1. Just let people parent! Unless their child is in harm, WHF cares

I couldn't agree more!

I don't cio, but that's because I don't have too. If dd was a horrible sleeper (knock on wood), I'd be reading all these sleep books and researching too. If cio is what it took to get her to sleep, that's what I'd do.

LilCMom · March 2010

ITA...almost all of our mothers let us CIO. My mom did and she is my best friend; I have never felt neglected by her. I think it's just as important to teach your child healthy sleeping habits so they will sleep on their own.

tigergreen · March 2010

cskogsberg:
ITA...almost all of our mothers let us CIO. My mom did and she is my best friend; I have never felt neglected by her..

exactly.

a lot of this new so-called "research" is just people trying to sell books to an audience that is, for all intents & purposes, completely vulnerable, and often times, naive.

CIO is a method that parents used for decades, and only for the past 10-15 years have people started believing that it's somehow "damaging" to the child's psyche.

I dare say we've got more nutcases running around these days than there were even 20 years ago...obviously CIO isn't the reason.

smilelari · March 2010

cskogsberg:
ITA...almost all of our mothers let us CIO..

Really??? My mom didn't

Sticky41284 · March 2010

HA! I wrote my CIO post before reading this. My bad, dawg!

SeaMama · March 2010

tigergreen:

cskogsberg:
ITA...almost all of our mothers let us CIO. My mom did and she is my best friend; I have never felt neglected by her..

exactly.

a lot of this new so-called "research" is just people trying to sell books to an audience that is, for all intents & purposes, completely vulnerable, and often times, naive.

CIO is a method that parents used for decades, and only for the past 10-15 years have people started believing that it's somehow "damaging" to the child's psyche.

I dare say we've got more nutcases running around these days than there were even 20 years ago...obviously CIO isn't the reason.

I hate the ":our parents did it" argument. My parents didn't own a car seat and I am just fine. Does that mean I shouldn't put my kid in a car seat?

Mrs.RMama · March 2010

SeaMama:
tigergreen:

cskogsberg:
ITA...almost all of our mothers let us CIO. My mom did and she is my best friend; I have never felt neglected by her..

exactly.

a lot of this new so-called "research" is just people trying to sell books to an audience that is, for all intents & purposes, completely vulnerable, and often times, naive.

CIO is a method that parents used for decades, and only for the past 10-15 years have people started believing that it's somehow "damaging" to the child's psyche.

I dare say we've got more nutcases running around these days than there were even 20 years ago...obviously CIO isn't the reason.

I hate the ":our parents did it" argument. My parents didn't own a car seat and I am just fine. Does that mean I shouldn't put my kid in a car seat?

this exactly. My mother also fed me solids at four weeks. Doesn't mean Lo got them at that age.

Want a personalized experience?

My two cents about CIO posts

Re: My two cents about CIO posts

Choose Another Board

Search Boards