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2nd Trimester
Children On Leashes
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Re: Children On Leashes
THIS!
There is only so much a parent can do with two hands and two kids in a crowded area. Leashes may not be for everyone, but don't judge. It's not like the kids are being tied to a tree with them. Those that use them are most likely trying to get their very active toddler from one place to another as safely as possible.
This thread is awesome! I have a long list of things I said I'd never do . . . and in a year or two, you will too!
No offense, but I stayed with my sis through my nieces toddler yeras and I had no problem getting her to hold my hand. If she refused then she didn't get to watch cartoons or play with a certain toy. I set boundaries. Somehow generations of parents before us did too.
To each his own. You want to leash your child so be it. Your perogative, but, in my opinion, it isn't for me and I can't help but roll my eyes.
This was me the other day in the store. I had to drop my purse and bags to get her. Thankfully the women behind me in line watched my stuff. I had never considered a leash/backpack would be useful until this incident.
Never say never!!
This.
There was a whole long thread about this on the trimester boards when I was pg with DD with people talking about how ABUSIVE it is. Please.
We've never used one- yet. But when my daughter ripped her hand out of mine and ran directly for the parking lot (and on coming cars), you bet I thought about getting one. I told her to stop- she thought it was a funny game.
Please think twice before judging someone's parenting skills over something that is designed to keep their children safe.
I cannot wait until some of you first time moms that think it is so horrible have your babies turn 2 and all the sudden become independent and refuse to ride in a stroller or hold your hand. And when they are stiff as a board and you can't get them to sit down or rolling on the ground it is not as simple as just standing them up and holding their little hands and walking away happily.
Don't judge until you are in the situation and have a child of your own that thinks it is fun to run from mommy and have her chase him.
Oh, and I have never used a leash but I have seriously considered it and I don't judge other parents for it either.
Right On! My name is Simon and like to draw drawings!
I can't say that I would have chosen differently, in her situation. That being said, I have no plans to get one for our LO.
Generations ago we didn't have Disneyland or Massive Airports. Also single moms were by the wayside. When it was just my mom and I doing these things she didn't have anyone else to help her with a rambunctious 3 year old.
Until you parent that particular child, never say never. Children have free will and will go off running if/when they get the urge. In crowded places, those leashes can be a literal life-saver. You can train a dog to sit/stay/etc. But, training a toddler is simply not that easy! It's a MUCH longer learning process - they are little people with their own thoughts/wants/ideas. And, I don't buy the crap about how the parents must not have "control" over their child or the child isn't disciplined, enough. Toddlers are not that predictable (some are, some aren't - they all have their own temperments and it has nothing to do with inadequate discipline).
Having said that, I've never used one, but I'm not going to say "never."
ETA: Oh, and having seen (or have taken care of) one toddler (or even two or three) behave in crowded places without it, is not a rule for them all. Toddlers are definitely something that can not be generalized. Judge away, though. IMO there are much more interesting things to judge ;P
Exactly. It's not like I'm going to take my child to the neighborhood park wearing one but there are times when it's the safest option.
umm, wait until you have a toddler and then learn how to "control" them!
before i was a parent, i thought whenever my child does something she shouldn't be doing, i will be able to just give her "the look" and she will stop immediately and comply. get real. that might work for an older child, who can listen, understands right from wrong and understands the outcome of their unwanted behavior. but those monkey leashes are made for toddlers that can dart out into a parking lot, for when they scream and cry about being in the stroller and will not let you hold their hand. i will take a toddler on a leash over one that squirms out of my grasp and runs in front of a car, period.
i have used my "leash" once, at the zoo and it was great. i also plan on using it again in the airport when we travel cross country by ourselves. flame away.
i think this is one of those "just wait and see" situtations. because before having a toddler, i felt the same way.
Very mature response. Are you 12?
Those are also very good points. Those things do annoy me too.
The day I lose my child in a mall or walmart or wherever she will go on a leash. I care about my LO. I would go in panic mode if I lost her.
Boundaries for a 22 month old? If only he understood.
"It can be demanding to watch your child", seriously you sound like an ass_hole. It's not just demanding when you have your arms full of carry on books and games for the plane ride. (otherwise you would post about what kind of inconsiderate person lets their child cry on an airplane), your carry on luggage, and your diaper bag through a crowded place with strangers who may just be looking for an opportunity to snatch a cute kid. I don't care what you think about me, what I care about is not losing the love of my life.
Also- I did buy a collar and name tag for her lovey. If we ever lost donkey should would be devastated.
It seems the people that say they don't like the leashes are always people without children, which I find humorous.
I didn't really like them before having children either, or rather just thought they were funny, but when presented with flying by myself and my 2 year old in the middle of winter where I would be carrying our carry on bags plus our coats through the airport, I decided to suck it up and try it since I knew that the chances of me having a free hand ALL the time were slim to none.
We have one and I could count on one hand the times we've actually used it as a leash (we've had it for almost 2 years). DD LOVES to wear it. In fact, she insisted on wearing it when we went to the hospital yesterday.
I think it's another thing where you shouldn't put other people down until you've actually been in the situation yourself.
And no, sometimes hand holding just doesn't work with a strong willed toddler in a busy place.
And I can't help but roll my eyes at how judgemental you are. Considering the fact that you yourself do not have a toddler, you don't know how toddlers can be sometimes. Wow! Your niece held your hand, good for her. Toddlers don't like to hold their parents hands for a reason, because we make the rules, we tell them "no".
You seriously need some perspective... you'll get it soon enough, when you have your own toddler.
It is so funny to see the responses to a post like this on the tri boards. I guarantee that if this were posted on the Parenting board where the posters have toddlers and older children, the responses would be so different.
Not everyone here will have completely compliant toddlers who will hold your hand or want to sit in the stroller the entire time you are out. These leashes are for the child's safety. If the parent is not using the harness to yank the kid here and there, drag them on the floor, etc., then who cares?
Glad you you have this parenting thing all figured out already. Congrats. The rest of us must have a lot to learn from you.
Yup. Given that a lot of situations when parents use leashes were not an issue 'generations' ago, that's irrelevant. Having your kid toddle off on the farm or in the family grocer is not the same as having him wonder off at Disneyland, the mall, or in a crowded grocery store. Times have also changed. My mom's got a great story of me running off away from them in NY, chatting up the doorman of a hotel, and asking the bum what he was drinking. In the late 70's that was something you laughed over, now, someone would probably be after your head for child neglect if you were lucky enough not to have your kid snatched.
Ditto
I thought my response was nice, but this quickly turned into one of the most judgemental posts I've ever read.
I think that if you are walking around a mall or fair or otherwise with an 18 month old who doesn't want to be in the stroller, this is the most effective way to keep a handle on them. Not that they are necessarily running all over, but doesn't it seem better than bending over to walk with them, and better than having them disappear in a crowd? I'd rather have my kid on a leash then having to bend over to reach their hand to walk everywhere - wouldn't that hurt your back too? I think its a safetly issue too, at least you would know your child is attached to you. I was just at the mall not to long ago and found a little two year old who'd wondered down the hall and lost his mommy, she was only about 100ft back but couldn't see him becuase he was too small - both were looking for eachother frantically but were both lost in the crowd, now if he'd had a leash that probably wouldn't have happened.
It seems (just an observation) that the same people who are so incredibly anti child harness are maybe the same ones who let their dogs run all over without a leash? I dunno, maybe its just me.
It's not harming the child, so what's the big deal? My mother had a harness (like the Mike Meyers "Hypo-Hyper Kid" that a PP posted) for us. I had a "leash" for DD.
Yes, people have been keeping track of their kids for years. They still do, all the time. I didn't use the "leash" often, but it was in my purse for when it was needed.
I think you're assuming every toddler is the same.
Which is stupid.
I have twin brothers. Imaging having two toddler boys who figure out pretty quickly that you can run in opposite directions and mom can only catch one.
I can't imagine judging a parent for wanting to keep a kid safe. Like I said before: have you ever flown through the ATL airport? There isn't room to push a stroller, and you definitely can't just hold your kid's hand. Someone will knock into that child without a second thought. You either carry them or put them on a leash.
I fly in and out of ATL {I live here} no less than 10 times a year. I can't imagine NOT using a leash to control a toddler in that situation.
We have not used one, but I am not above it, and do not judge parents that do. I don't understand why you would be "annoyed" at this? How does this particular parenting decision of another person affect your life?
You can feel as you see fit, but I don't feel I don't have a clue. You don't have a clue about me. I've had plenty of experience with kids in amusement parks, airports, etc. I basically raised my niece and I never used a leash. In my opinion, it is unnecessary. If you think it is then by all means go ahead, but this is my opinion.
You hear the points but I'm not sure you are 'getting' them. You'll see when you have a runner on your hands...
Will do!
This, As you can see for the most part, those that have children think they are acceptable, and those that this is their first, do not. Do not judge. I have said I will not do things, and am doing them with my DD.