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Working Moms
Ugh WWYD?
I am going to be a SAHM in 4.5 months. I currently work 4 days/week, 32 hours. DH said he wanted me to quit sooner because he's sick of doing the drop-off (I pick-up). (He's been doing the drop-off since January when my hours were increased). I won't do that because our big annual project is due in July and it would be really bad for me to not see it through.
So now, he's pushing me to split the 32 hours over 5 days/week, so that I could do both drop-off and pick-up. I really don't want to because A) I think he should take some responsibility since he benefits from me working, and 
I really enjoy my long weekends with the kids. He thinks that because I'm only going to be working for another 4.5 months I should do this for him.
WWYD?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Ugh WWYD?
Since you are only working 4.5 more months DH can still do drop off -- there is light at the end of his tunnel - he won't be doing it forever.
Why should you do both?
Exactly. Why should I work and still do 90% of child-related stuff. Thank- you.
tell him to suck it up.
i don't like doing it either all the time but it has to be done. hellllo childish!
look at the birds | bless this food
AS everyone has already said - tell him to suck it up! I do drop off and dh does pick up...unless he's wroking late...then I suck it up and do both....
I'm sitting here thinking "really? REALLY?". He doesn't like it, so his solution is for you to change your schedule so that you can do BOTH? Why does he think you like it anymore than him?
And, AND, this is when there is a known end to this! And he still doesn't want to do it.
He just seems really selfish on this. It's his child too - why isn't he willing to take on a fair share of the responsibilities?!
What I would do is say "Uh, dude, you're the father and our child is jsut as much your responsibility as it is mine. even when I'm a SAHM, don't be thinking that means you get to sit back and relax while I do everything. I had a child WITH you to have a child WITH you. Not so that I could do all the parenting while you have things easy.....".
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Okay, you ladies have me laughing here. Yes, he is being a big baby. I
dup
I feel like my DH was a big douche on my maternity leave. He'd pull the work card all the time and push things on me because of work. I don't think I would SAH anyway, but it made me feel really unequal in our marriage and influenced my decision to go back. And he actually wanted me to work. Things got much more balanced around the house (though I still do more, of course)
Not saying your DH will be like mine, but he's definitely not valuing what you are doing for the family now and willing to dump more on you because you work less. What is going to happen when you don't work at all? Might be a good conversation to have...
If this is purely because it inconveniences him, not because it is putting him in a difficult position of always being late at work or something, I'd tell him to SUCK.IT.UP. Dude, he's a parent -- that's 24/7, not when it is convenient. I see no reason why you should absorb the brunt of the daycare work here just because it bothers him.
With that said, if there are true difficulties being caused -- work issues, substantially longer commute time or the like -- I would likely acquiese for those reasons.
DD -- 5YO
DS -- 3YO
What?!
My DH considers splitting the pick up and drop off with me as part of his responsibility...he'd never expect me to do both. Obviously there are times where we help each other out, but we split it. That's crazy that he'd expect you to do both.
Um no, he can do it.
I agree with several others that you need to have a conversation with him about what is expectations are for your SAHM-hood, because if they are that you will handle all child-related responsibilities, that's going to be a major problem in your marriage.
Is he pushing you to SAH also, or is that something you want to do?
All the posters here keep saying they "suck it up" and do drop off or pick up. DH and I fight over who can pick up the kids at the end of the day! That is by far and away the best moment of the day for us! DS1 comes running to the door screaming, "Mommy!!" (Or Daddy) and gives us the biggest hug. And the smile on DS2 face makes everything right in the world. Dropping off isnt as fun, but I never really thought of it as a chore. DH and I split doing drop off and pick up because of our work schedules but neither have ever thought of it as something we dont want to do. I am surprised.
As pp have said, I think your DH should continue to drop off. It is only 4 months!!
Until January, I did about 90% of the child related responsibilities, even though I was working 24 hours/week. So when they increased my hours to 32, Dh had to pick up some of the slack.
The SAH thing is a mutual decision.
THIS!!! urks the heck out of me
This.