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2nd Trimester
Anyone else having to share a room with baby?
We have a 1 1/2 story home...Perfect for two people...not so perfect for a family. We have one bedroom downstairs that is being used as a home office for my husband (he has his own business and works from home), and we have a loft upstairs with slanted ceilings that we use as our bedroom. That leaves us with no nursery...unless we convert one of the living rooms into a different room (which my husband will not do)-or unless my husband gives up his office to use as a nursery (which he won't do). My husband wants to put the nursery upstairs in our room and he has other people telling him that is a good idea. In order to avoid another fight about this, I guess we are putting the baby's stuff upstairs. Since the ceilings are slanted, it is really gonna suck having all the baby's furniture up there. Also, I kinda want my OWN room. I know I will end up sleeping downstairs with a bassinet for awhile (plus the bathroom is downstairs). Anyone else having a similar problem?
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Re: Anyone else having to share a room with baby?
That does suck. I would tell DH to move his office into one of the living rooms if you have more than one. We also have a two story house and two of the bedrooms are down stairs and then ours is upstairs so when we first bring her home we are going to have her upstairs in a bassenette(sp) but once she gets onto somewhat of a schedule then we will move her into her crib downstairs.
Your DH may end up changing his mind once all those 2 am feedings come and he hears crying and can't get a good nights sleep!
Similar....
Upstairs was an attic that was transformed into a bedroom/loft with a halfbath put in. Downstairs on the other side of the house is the only other bedroom that will someday be a nursery. DH and I have decided baby will be upstairs with us in a pack and play (that has a bassenet in it) for a few months before we are comfortable having the LO that far away from us. It's not ideal, we are using a room divider/screen to sort of split the room; so it still feels like ours for the most part.
Good luck!
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I don't have experience with this, as I'm fortunate to live in a house with 3 bedrooms (it's still a fairly small house, and we still need to do a ton of renovations with it to update it) but I just wanted to say.... I don't think it's fair that DH isn't willing to budge either way. I understand the space is small, but you have to work with what you've got. For a few weeks it would be nice and even convenient to have LO with you, but pretty soon you're going to want LO to have his/her (sorry I forgot to see what you're having) own space, as well as your own back.
IMO, your DH needs to compromise and give up one or the other. The home office, or the plans to turn the living room into two rooms.
Wow, your DH sounds a little.... headstrong.
I guess I'd ask him, "So.... are we just going to f*ck in front of the baby when they get older?"
Because seriously, I'm curious.
It just sucks cause I really wanted to do the whole "nesting" thing and paint the room, and decorate it with the baby's name in wooden letters, etc. Now, I have to find a way to separate the babys area from my bedroom area.
That's what I'm scared of. Also, I want the baby to be able to sleep on his own when we can get him on a schedule and not get used to mommy being by his side alll the time. I have friends that have kids that STILL sleep in the same bed as their kids and they are over 2 years old!
Also, you think it would be harder than getting up in the middle of the night and getting the baby from another room - it seems like it would be easier and gives a chance for a little more sleep for work the next day.
Not having this problem- just wanted to say we're in Tacoma, too
(DH is stationed at Ft. Lewis but we live in a house off base)
We're in a 2 bedroom apartment, but the second bedroom is our office (DH is finishing his long-distance bachelor's in video game design, so I understand the stubborn-ness of your DH!), and we have a lot of big, bulky furniture in there. Plus, we live on the 3rd floor, 4 flights of stairs up, so stashing the big furniture else where is out of the picture.
So yep, LO will be sleeping in our room for a few months until we end up moving again!
"I'll gladly take cold sores over eye herpes" -ElieFin
"Unicorn glitter gives me UTIs." -Leila'sMommy
Sorry, but I think your DH is being a bit unreasonable. I agree with a PP that he will need to compromise somewhere, either moving his office or making some changes to an existing living room.
Having the baby in the room with you is all nice in the very beginning, but what about when baby can sit or stand and look for you? That could really put a snag in your sex life.
Not at all, actually. Unless you're "I only have sex in the bed" kinda people. I think, if anything, co-sleeping spiced up our sex life because we had to get more inventive.
Sex doesn't have to be only in the bed, but it should certainly be an option. It would be annoying to have to skip a middle-of-the-night impulse or get out of the bed if the mood suddenly strikes. Having sex with the child in the bed would be totally inappropriate.
To each their own. What you find annoying I find fun. Neither DH or I have ever been bothered by having to slip out the door and into another room.
We have to share a room for a while. We have a small 3 bedroom & I work from home. We have the master, DS has his room & I use the 3rd as an office. I thought about trying to fit the crib in my office, but I'm not sure it would work since I have late night conference calls/random phone calls/faxes & the room is too small to fit my desk, bookshelf and a crib. DS's room is too small to fit a bed, his dresser, bookshelf and a crib. So, the master it is!
I also wanted to do something really cute for her, but I just don't think it's worth it for now. Maybe you can add some cute wall decals near/above her crib? If you have room, a nice table & chair would "complete" the feel that it's her space. For me, instead of nesting by creating a super sweet space, I'm nesting by finding ways to improve storage and organization in our house.
DS slept in our room for the first 3 months & the only reason I moved him was b/c I wanted him to be in his own room by the time I went back to work. For me though, I want the kiddo to be out by the time she's more aware of her surroundings & can spot us across from her (6 months at the latest). We'll either move (we're renting) or hopefully, I'll get another job & can use the office for her.
Honestly though, if you have 2 living spaces, why isn't DH budging? Is one his "man cave" or something? If it's not completely enclosed, I would have a hard time moving my office to a living space, but why is he against making a room for baby? PP's are right, he might give in after dealing with late nights for a while...
She never said she had sex in the bed with the child there. FWIW-we regularly leave the bedroom too b/c I won't have sex in the bed with my dogs in the room.