really REALLY frustrated with sleep issue

? Shween ? · February 2010

DD will absolutely NOT go to sleep in her crib. If we get her to fall asleep elsewhere, and she wakes up in the crib, she has a complete freakout. We've let her cry up to a half hour, but when she gets to a point of losing her breath and coughing up a storm, we have to get her. DH tried CIO with her when I wasn't home and even he said he couldn't let her cry the way she was any longer.

There has to be something else we can do other than letting her sleep in our bed every night. But to be honest, when she sleeps in our bed, she doesn't wake up, and DH and I actually get a full night's sleep.

UGH. I'm at a loss :-(

jeng329 · February 2010

I want to help you, I really do, but I have a really bad sleeper too!

Have you tried going in every couple of minutes to soothe her?

Does she have a lovie that you could sleep with for a night so that it smells like you?

jeng329 · February 2010

How big is your bedroom? What about moving the crib into your room and slowly moving it away?

kit443 · February 2010

I wish I had advice for you! Monk ends up in our bed every night. It is the only way I would get any decent sleep.

? Shween ? · February 2010

There's no way we could fit the crib in the bedroom - we barely were able to fit the P&P in there when she was a newborn, and now we have a bigger bed.

I've tried going to soothe her in gradual increments - after 2 mins, then after 5 mins, then 10 mins - she doesn't change a thing whether I'm in there or not - she just wants OUT of the crib all together. And as soon as she's picked up, the thumb goes in the mouth and she puts her head on your shoulder and she's out within a minute. Oh and she does have a little stuffed cat 'lovey' thing, but she's never had any real interest in it. We also tried to put one of my shirts in the crib with her and that didn't help either.

I really don't understand what the crib issue is. It's cozy, it's warm, it's not super hard or anything - I have no clue what to do.

EmmSquared · February 2010

have you read the sleep easy solution? it seriously saved my life! DS used to wake up every 30 mins or so and after one night of the sleep easy method he started sttn and has been since.

it has a lot of really good info that would probably help you guys!!! sounds like she is maybe confused when she wakes up in a different place than where she fell asleep and freaks out...

maybe check it ou!

jeng329 · February 2010

? Shween ?:
There's no way we could fit the crib in the bedroom - we barely were able to fit the P&P in there when she was a newborn, and now we have a bigger bed.
I've tried going to soothe her in gradual increments - after 2 mins, then after 5 mins, then 10 mins - she doesn't change a thing whether I'm in there or not - she just wants OUT of the crib all together. And as soon as she's picked up, the thumb goes in the mouth and she puts her head on your shoulder and she's out within a minute. Oh and she does have a little stuffed cat 'lovey' thing, but she's never had any real interest in it. We also tried to put one of my shirts in the crib with her and that didn't help either.
I really don't understand what the crib issue is. It's cozy, it's warm, it's not super hard or anything - I have no clue what to do.

It sounds like a sleep association where she only wants you. I'm having this problem too.

I am trying to do CIO in increments now. I want to rock him to sleep, but it's not working

? Shween ? · February 2010

kit443:
I wish I had advice for you! Monk ends up in our bed every night. It is the only way I would get any decent sleep.

Honestly, I really don't mind having her in the bed with us, but DH doesn't want to create a habit of it for her - especially since we want to TTC in the next few months - I don't want to have a newborn and then a near 2 yr old sleeping in our bed!.

kit443 · February 2010

? Shween ?:
kit443:
I wish I had advice for you! Monk ends up in our bed every night. It is the only way I would get any decent sleep.
Honestly, I really don't mind having her in the bed with us, but DH doesn't want to create a habit of it for her - especially since we want to TTC in the next few months - I don't want to have a newborn and then a near 2 yr old sleeping in our bed!.

That is my concern as well.

I love bed sharing but ultimately the crib is where he needs to be. We always start the night with him in the crib - but he wakes up and wants nothing to do with the crib. I bet we will do some form of sleep easy/sleep lady shuffle when Monk is a little bit older.

Mando91 · February 2010

Where does your LO take naps? Maybe start with naps in the crib and after she gets used to naps move towards working on the night. Night is tough, especially since it's completely dark in the room. We did CIO first with naps and actually never had to do nights b/c she just got used to putting herself to sleep. GL!

? Shween ? · February 2010

Mando91:
Where does your LO take naps? Maybe start with naps in the crib and after she gets used to naps move towards working on the night. Night is tough, especially since it's completely dark in the room. We did CIO first with naps and actually never had to do nights b/c she just got used to putting herself to sleep. GL!

She naps either on the floor in the living room (weird, I know - but she likes it) or in my bed. I've tried to CIO her with naps and/or if she falls asleep on me, I move her to the crib, but the same rule applies: crib = freakout.

MoMandA · February 2010

We got some Fisher Price Lullaby CDs and move the music around with them so they associate the music with sleep. When the CD ends they generally don't wake up. If they start to fuss we restart the CD. Also we would rub the lovey on their faces when they cry, now they do it for themselves. It isn't perfect but it was starting to get better before they got sick. We have tried everything because we cannot sleep with both of them.

mielkede · February 2010

Have you tried heating the crib with a heating pad before you put your lo down. That way the cold of the crib does not wake them up. We also sometimes for naps put a fuzzy blanket down on the bottom of the crib so it does not feel like a hard crib mattress. I don't know if this will help much as DD has slept in her crib since she was 3 weeks old as she was a loud grunter as a newborn.

WaitingForMyMiracle · February 2010

Mason disliked the crib at first. I started letting him hang out in there while I played with him or just putzed around in his room. I gave him a few soft toys and he got used to the crib being a "happy" place. When you start CIO it could quickly turn the crib into an "unhappy" place if the CIO doesn't work or you quit too early. I think you need to change his association with the crib first.

curlycasey · February 2010

OK...this is what we did. I know it may be different because we put LO in his crib at two months, but he would still wake up at 4 a.m. or 5 and then we'd let him sleep with us for a couple more hours so we could get sleep. That ended pretty quick because he got too heavy to lay on our chest.

We started getting him to "like" being in the crib during the day. Give toys to play with, play music and interact with them, use the mobile (and we walked away at times so he got used to it). Then we did the CIO method. Which took a week or so. Now, he sleeps on his tummy ALL NIGHT LONG and loves his glow worm playing as he goes to bed.

Maybe try tummy sleeping since she's old enough. It's more cozy and comforting (like being against mom). Of course, use a sleepsack, no blankies. We also use a sound machine that has a running water sound DS loves.

Good luck!

MidwestTexan · February 2010

The problem lies in letting her fall asleep somewhere and then moving her to the crib...she needs to fall asleep in the crib so that when she wakes up she knows she's in the same place as she was before she went to sleep. I'm surprised you haven't read this in any baby books, not just books about sleep.

Trixie6717 · February 2010

WaitingForMyMiracle:
Mason disliked the crib at first. I started letting him hang out in there while I played with him or just putzed around in his room. I gave him a few soft toys and he got used to the crib being a "happy" place. When you start CIO it could quickly turn the crib into an "unhappy" place if the CIO doesn't work or you quit too early. I think you need to change his association with the crib first.

This. We did the same thing with the boys. Some people argue that crib=sleep and you shouldn't let them "play" in there but they love their crib and never cry when I put them in it, whether it is sleep time or just a few minutes of play time while I put away clothes or change a diaper, etc.

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