being maid of honor while pregnant?

McMrs · February 2010

Dh and I are going to start trying to get pregnant in April. My best friend just got engaged and will be getting married August 21. She wants me to be her maid of honor. If by some miracle we do get pregnant before then do you think it would still be ok to stand for her? I figured I'd ask here rather than on the Trying to get Pregnant board because you guys are already pregnant and I'd like to know how you'd feel standing in a wedding at this point? I know if I did get pregnant I wouldn't be that far along and therefore shouldn't be showing so I don't think that would be a problem. What do you think?

LCB34 · February 2010

Pregnancy does not all of the sudden give you the right to be a sh!tty friend.

If you would be in the wedding not pregnant, than there is NO reason why you can't be in the wedding pregnant.

MrsVonKikabee · February 2010

I think don't put the cart before the horse.

At most, you would be 5 months pregnant. If you can't stand for a 15 minute ceremony, they can get you a chair. Be the maid of honor for your friend.

jdoman · February 2010

I wouldn't mind at all if I was going to be 4 months pregnant, max, at the time of the wedding. I guess the only thing I would keep in mind is that traditionally the maid of honor is expected to be pretty heavily involved in the wedding planning process (bridal shower, bachelorette party, etc), and if you're struggling with m/s or fatigue during the first trimester, you might not feel up to all that being the moh entails.

chach916 · February 2010

I'm in a wedding in June....I'd say unless she is a crazy, all about me, bridezilla, you should be ok.

MAtoMN · February 2010

I think you will be just fine. First, it may take a few months for you to get pregnant. Second, you can still look cute in a wedding while pregnant! I am also going to be maid of honor in a wedding on Aug. 21, but I'll be 7.5 months pregnant and will look like a fat blob!

j_st.charles · February 2010

I am the maid of honor in my sister's wedding in March and will be 4 months. Just make sure your dress fits! : )

McMrs · February 2010

jdoman:
I wouldn't mind at all if I was going to be 4 months pregnant, max, at the time of the wedding. I guess the only thing I would keep in mind is that traditionally the maid of honor is expected to be pretty heavily involved in the wedding planning process (bridal shower, bachelorette party, etc), and if you're struggling with m/s or fatigue during the first trimester, you might not feel up to all that being the moh entails.

We live in different provinces, so I won't be that involved (although I would love to be able to help her out more), and we won't be going there until 4 days before the wedding

McMrs · February 2010

MAtoMN:
I think you will be just fine. First, it may take a few months for you to get pregnant. Second, you can still look cute in a wedding while pregnant! I am also going to be maid of honor in a wedding on Aug. 21, but I'll be 7.5 months pregnant and will look like a fat blob!

I know it may take a while to get pregnant, (that's why I said if by some miracle), I'm just hoping it won't, lol.

I'm sure you'll look great.

mrs.g_6708 · February 2010

You can't plan your life around when you may or may not be pregnant. It took me 13 months to get pregnant. Imagine how silly you'll look if you tell her no and you still haven't even gotten pregnant yet. I think you'd be just fine.

ckettenb · February 2010

I've seen a few pregnant BMs. It's always seemed like no big deal. If you are showing, you'll get a slightly different BM dress... and if it's your first pregnancy it's pretty likely that you won't be showing by Aug. (or at least not showing much)... so you might even be able to just buy a bigger size in the same dress as the other girls.

Either way - no biggie.

If you happen to have terrible morning sickness or something to that effect that prevents you leaving the house or something - well, you'll just have to cross that bridge when you get there.

All and all - I wouldn't worry about it. Instead, be excited for you friend's engagement and honored that she's wants you to be her maid of honor. Pregnancy usually isn't debilitating or something you want to hide from the world - so I would think there would be no problem with you standing up proudly next to your friend while she says her vows. But you'll probably have to skip the champagne toast at the reception.

Best of luck in April!!!

McMrs · February 2010

mrs.gardner:

You can't plan your life around when you may or may not be pregnant. It took me 13 months to get pregnant. Imagine how silly you'll look if you tell her no and you still haven't even gotten pregnant yet. I think you'd be just fine.

I wouldn't think of telling her no if I'm not pregnant. I was just wondering if I were pregnant by then how/if it would affect anything.

Mrs. Action · February 2010

I'm in a wedding in April and I will be 24 weeks pregnant. I just bought a maternity dress and will have it altered around that time. I think you will be fine.

ilovetolaugh · February 2010

LCB34:
Pregnancy does not all of the sudden give you the right to be a sh!tty friend.

If you would be in the wedding not pregnant, than there is NO reason why you can't be in the wedding pregnant.

true that.

sillypit · February 2010

I'm the MOH in a wedding when I will be 6 months along. The bride is thrilled, we're going to look at new maternity bridesmaid dresses next week. There is no reason for pregnancy to keep you from standing up for your friend.

McMrs · February 2010

ckettenb:

Best of luck in April!!!

Thanks

bstrangely · February 2010

do it! it's a great honor and if you keep the bride informed she will probably be fine. i'm in a wedding in may (6 mos) and the bride is elated for us. i'm sweating the dress a little, but that's why i'm glad i'm keeping her in the loop. satin sheaths just aren't all that forgiving, you know?

good luck!

BabyCakes3 · February 2010

I'll be 8 months pregnant in my best friend's wedding. I was 6 months last year in another friend's wedding. It's doable. I just told her I wouldn't survive outside in July!

MrsLeanna · February 2010

My SIL was 6 months pregnant with twins and she flew down from nashville to be in my wedding. She wasn't my MOH, just a BM but she was fine. She looked adorable with her belly. Pregnancy does not make you crippled. If I can keep up with a toddler on a daily basis, you'll be ok to carry out your MOH duties.

Good luck TTC!

KelzinBoston · February 2010

You're overthinking it.

Being pregnant doesn't make you an invalid.

At best you'd be a few months along (and hopefully you will get a BFP quickly so you'll be KU at the wedding), you'll likely not even be showing, and you'll have a blast!

caprocornia · February 2010

My sister-in-law asked me to be in her wedding, and I left her know that DH and I were planning on trying and obviously we had no idea how things would work out. I told her if she didn't want me in the wedding, I understood. She was completely supportive. I'll be about 5-5 1/2 months for her wedding. I told her just to be honest and give her the choice for how she wants her wedding.

ss1971 · February 2010

I was in a wedding party that included 2 pregnant bridesmaids. They looked adorable and glowing! There are maternity bridesmaid dresses available, or you could just buy a bigger size and alter it.

Lazzlee79 · February 2010

I was MOH at 8 months and I didn't find it to be a problem at all. I planned the Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party and waddled down the isle gracefully (well no I tripped, but I still did it).

eris1995 · February 2010

I don't see any reason why you couldn't be a maid of honor. She's still going to be your friend, right? I was in my dad's wedding when I was 5 months pg.

AmandaAndTj · February 2010

I will be 21 weeks pg at my cousins wedding at which I will be her maid of honor. Luckily we knew this before we decided on dresses. We didnt think it would be an issue bc we didnt think I would get pg right away.... well it literally took us one try so hopefully I wont look too huge in her wedding pics.

HawaiiLover · February 2010

mrs.gardner:

You can't plan your life around when you may or may not be pregnant. It took me 13 months to get pregnant. Imagine how silly you'll look if you tell her no and you still haven't even gotten pregnant yet. I think you'd be just fine.

Second this. You have to do what's right for you and your hubby. If you get pregnant, you get pregnant. Hopefully your friend is overjoyed for you and you are over thinking this. I know sometimes brides turn into bridezillas and get really pissed about pregnant MOH and BM's but then she isn't a true friend. You have to live your life and not around anyone elses. Good luck!!!! And enjoy the wedding

MrsMucker · February 2010

There is no reason you couldn't be in a wedding while pregnant.

SuperThat1006 · February 2010

If I am pregnant now, I will be about 20 weeks when I'm the Matron of Honor in one of my best friend's weddings. Luckily, she picked a flowy dress with an empire waist, so I'm hoping the whole dress thing works out!

lo1457 · February 2010

I am the matron of honor in my best friend's wedding in May I'll be around 25 weeks. When I first found out i was pregnant I told my best friend, and I said I understood if she didn't want to be the matron of honor still, I gave her the choice. Of course she wanted me to be so i was fine with it, luckily the bridemaid dress she chose came in maternity size.

skyejo · February 2010

Say you do get pregnant the first month trying. You would be, at the most, five months pregnant. It's not like you would be pushing 40 weeks and need to be concerned about delivering on the aisle.

I am a BM in a wedding in April and I'll be 17 weeks along. Other than being slightly worried that my dress won't fit, I'm not too concerned about anything else.

Start trying when you want and don't worry about what future plans like weddings that you may have.

kimber926 · February 2010

I will be 30 weeks and MOH in my sister's wedding....a 12 hour drive away. I wouldn't miss it for the world.

kjr · February 2010

I was a bridesmaid for someone I really didn't even like when I was pregnant with my first son. So I say totally do it for your best friend. Smile

It was ok. I just had to get my dress altered. (She wanted us all to wear the same.)

That.Just.Happened · February 2010

I am going to be flying to a wedding that I am in at the end of August and I am due mid-October. I wouldn't worry about it.

caprocornia · February 2010

I will say about the dress that my SIL did NOT pick a dress that would work with pregnancy. I had to order it huge and with extra length, and it'll basically need to be remade to work. She chose something with ruching (sp?) around the middle. I am going to need that whole part moved up to be empire waist. Extra money I don't want to spend, but such is life.

HelloStarbuck · February 2010

I'll be the matron of honour in my friends wedding at the end of April, putting me at almost 5 months along. We ordered a dress that's empire waisted and flowy so that I'll fit no matter what size I am. Not a big deal at all.

LadyV13 · February 2010

I had a similar problem as you - my friend is getting married on 8/14- and well I am due on 8/18...

However because I knew there was going to be an issue with buying a dress I needed to tell her ahead of time that DH and I were trying. I then told her as soon as the DR confirmed the pregnancy.

I'm guessing you are buying your dress before April. I think this will be more of an issue then the standing while pregnant. Because you'll be in your second trimester by August (if everything goes well right away) and that is supposedly the best one as far as comfort goes...I'll let you know in a few days haha.

I would say because you don't know when it will happen- i'd just leave it. Tell her news when you have it. And if you get an extra long dress, or one extra large you can get it tailored to fit properly.

I only told My friend because we're talking about 4 days..which umm wish me luck on that one..as of now i plan on walking down that isle for her!

verona_1999 · February 2010

I am going to be my sisters moh in May. I will be 6 months pregnant! The funny thing is, when she told me she got engaged she told me i better not get pregnant!!! I was worried about telling her at first, but she was very excited for us and couldn't be happier to have a pregnant maid of honor!!

jenybear1229 · February 2010

I thought the same thing. My friend is getting married this July. When we ordered dresses I only ordered a size bigger not thinking it would happen as quickly as it did. I will be 8 months pregnant at her wedding and I am the maid of honor. I just had them recut a new dress. Just let the bride know you are planning on trying so you may be pregnant for the wedding.

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