Trying to Get Pregnant

NGPR: I'm disappointed in DH :(

My mom is coming in to town to stay with my brother (because he and his wife just had a baby last week) for 1 week starting this saturday.  She lives in FL we live in NJ and only get to see each other about once a year.  Last time DH and I saw her was in early April last year when we went down to FL. 

I called him this morning to let DH know that I am going to take Monday the 8th and Friday the 12th off from work in the hopes that we can visit my brother's house and spend time with her on Sunday the 7th, Monday the 8th, and Friday the 12th before she has to leave on the 13th.  3 days...that's all I'm asking for.  Please note that DH and my mom get along wonderfully and really genuinely love and care for one another.

DH is saying that Sunday is the Superbowl and he might be spending time with his friends (who live in NYC and he can see anytime) and he doesn't want to let them down.  I told him that I'm sure my brother will have the game on at his house but nope, DH wants to spend it with his friends.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I understand that the Superbowl is only once a year and it's only one evening/night that he'd miss with my mom.  But it's one out of only 3 days we have with her out of the whole year.  I don't know...I didn't yell or even get an attitude on the phone but I did ask him to think about what he's saying and to put himself in my shoes.

Maybe I'm wrong in this but I'm a little disappointed in him.

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Re: NGPR: I'm disappointed in DH :(

  • i understand where he is coming from...but i would be disappointed too

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  • Ahhh... this is frustrating! And kind of a sticky situation. From his point of view, it's THE SUPERBOWL (glows in neon lights, harps sounding in the background). I'm totally with you, though, and it's the ONLY time you get to spend time with your mom.

    Could you maybe take time and spend Sunday with just her? Like a girl's day? Pedicures, lunch, shopping perhaps?

    GL!

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  • ummm yeah i would be mad too. and then i would tell DH you can see your friends anytime. get over it you are coming to my brothers.
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  • I can understand your disappointment.  Can he spend some time Sunday with her in the morning and early afternoon and then head out mid-late afternoon?

    Also, ygpm

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  • can't you negotiate it so that he spends the Saturday and the Friday, but he goes to the SB on Sunday? or you do brunch on Sunday then he goes to his friends and you continue hanging with your mom?

    (Sorry, but I'm a Super Bowl girl)

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  • I don't care for football so I can't say I know where he is coming from. I'd be disappointed in him too. I think your Mom should be more important than a game. Thats just my opinion.
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  • imagenvandersommers:

    Ahhh... this is frustrating! And kind of a sticky situation. From his point of view, it's THE SUPERBOWL (glows in neon lights, harps sounding in the background). I'm totally with you, though, and it's the ONLY time you get to spend time with your mom.

    Could you maybe take time and spend Sunday with just her? Like a girl's day? Pedicures, lunch, shopping perhaps?

    GL!

    It's not the superbowl for DH, it's watching the superbowl with his friends. She said he could watch it at the brother's.

     OP - i feel you. I would be pissed because i go through this often. My mom lives away from me and we only see them every so often. Sorry this is happening.... 

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  • I think you should go to see your family and if DH doesn;t want to come, then it's his loss.  At least, this way, you'll be able to see your family.

    But, FWIW, I'd be disappointed, too.

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  • Its your mother...enjoy your time with her and let your husband have his fun.  I dont really understand the issue. 

     

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  • imagegymnst1013:

    I can understand your disappointment.  Can he spend some time Sunday with her in the morning and early afternoon and then head out mid-late afternoon?

    Also, ygpm

    This! I would be upset with DH if I was you, but I would try to compromise! GL

  • imageNova726:

    can't you negotiate it so that he spends the Saturday and the Friday, but he goes to the SB on Sunday? or you do brunch on Sunday then he goes to his friends and you continue hanging with your mom?

    (Sorry, but I'm a Super Bowl girl)

    I agree, I would kind of be happy to have a day alone with my mother and/or mother and brother. 

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  • imagenvandersommers:

    Ahhh... this is frustrating! And kind of a sticky situation. From his point of view, it's THE SUPERBOWL (glows in neon lights, harps sounding in the background). I'm totally with you, though, and it's the ONLY time you get to spend time with your mom.

    Could you maybe take time and spend Sunday with just her? Like a girl's day? Pedicures, lunch, shopping perhaps?

    GL!

    I totally get it, I promise...lol.  It is the SUPERBOWL! But honestly, she comes in on Saturday late at night so it's not like we can spend any significant time with her then so Sunday is the first opportunity to see her and hang out with her.  The timing just sucks.  Any I don't want to take her away from my brother's house especially on her first day here because the main reason she's here is to spend time with her new grand-daughter.
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  • imagegymnst1013:

    I can understand your disappointment.  Can he spend some time Sunday with her in the morning and early afternoon and then head out mid-late afternoon?

    Also, ygpm

    This might end up being what we do.  I'd feel bad though.  I'll check my PM in 2 minutes!
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
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  • imageNova726:

    can't you negotiate it so that he spends the Saturday and the Friday, but he goes to the SB on Sunday? or you do brunch on Sunday then he goes to his friends and you continue hanging with your mom?

    (Sorry, but I'm a Super Bowl girl)

    We'll be watching the superbowl...at my brother's house lol.
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
    DS #1 Born 1/3/11 after IVF #1
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  • imagePinkLove-S:
    imagenvandersommers:

    Ahhh... this is frustrating! And kind of a sticky situation. From his point of view, it's THE SUPERBOWL (glows in neon lights, harps sounding in the background). I'm totally with you, though, and it's the ONLY time you get to spend time with your mom.

    Could you maybe take time and spend Sunday with just her? Like a girl's day? Pedicures, lunch, shopping perhaps?

    GL!

    It's not the superbowl for DH, it's watching the superbowl with his friends. She said he could watch it at the brother's.

     OP - i feel you. I would be pissed because i go through this often. My mom lives away from me and we only see them every so often. Sorry this is happening.... 

    Thanks Smile
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
    DS #1 Born 1/3/11 after IVF #1
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  • I'd be a bit sad, but totally okay with DH wanting to do his thing and me go spend time with my family. Just because we're married and he likes my Mom doesn't mean he HAS to see her.
    If it were me, I'd let him go do his thing and you go spend time with your Mom.
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  • imagesoutherngirlinNY:

    Its your mother...enjoy your time with her and let your husband have his fun.  I dont really understand the issue. 

     

    Really?  Hmmm...well, I have no choice but to compromise if he doesn't come around.  I do have an issue with this though.
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
    DS #1 Born 1/3/11 after IVF #1
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  • imageMaybeBaby#2:
    I'd be a bit sad, but totally okay with DH wanting to do his thing and me go spend time with my family. Just because we're married and he likes my Mom doesn't mean he HAS to see her.
    If it were me, I'd let him go do his thing and you go spend time with your Mom.
    I'm always ok with DH doing his thing and spending time with his friends hanging out.  I have no problem with that whatsoever.  It's just that Superbowl Sunday happens to be the first opportunity to spend with her and it's going to be awkward for me to explain why he isn't around that day.  Really, the issue is mine and I totally know that because my mom would probably not care much.  I guess I was expecting him to think spending time with my mom on her first day here (and seeing Superbowl at my brother's house) would be more important than Superbowl with his friends.
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
    DS #1 Born 1/3/11 after IVF #1
    4 failed IUIs, including 1 CP
    PCOS
    TTC since 2008

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  • Thanks for the feedback, ladies!  I definitely appreciate seeing both sides.  Still disappointed though, lol.  Oh well...compromise!!
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
    DS #1 Born 1/3/11 after IVF #1
    4 failed IUIs, including 1 CP
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  • If the game will be on where you're at and he will have the freedom to be engrossed in it, he should be able to make the sacrifice.

    Being an NFL person, I understand the importance in watching the game, but location shouldn't be that big of an issue considering the circumstances.

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  • imagemommajen8:
    ummm yeah i would be mad too. and then i would tell DH you can see your friends anytime. get over it you are coming to my brothers.
    Yes I like the way you think, lol!
    FET to TTC #2: 9/29/14 Beta on 10/8/14 = BFP!
    DS #1 Born 1/3/11 after IVF #1
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