Ohhh MIL long

Shandie_725 · February 2010

Last night, MIL came in our room and was telling us that LO's dresser is going to go here and that I really need to clean the space next to my bed so that we can put the bassinet there and what are we going to do when the nephews come over (they're 14 and 11). DH says to her, "I'm living in my bubble of delusion." She pauses, looks at him and asks what that means. He says that he's in "a bubble of delusion - right now, I know my wife is pregnant but I'm not going to process or discuss anything baby related" I'm going away to work for a few days and we were spending a baby-free night watching movies and the Celtics game.

I thought the woman was going to have a stroke - she got red in the face and started yelling at DH that he needs to take responsibility for his actions and that he can't ignore my pregnancy and we only have until the end of May to get everything together for LO.

She is so uptight about some of this stuff when we don't even ask or need her opinion. We honestly hadn't planned on getting LO a dresser - we have 2 drawers in our dresser that are empty, and there are also totes. I don't need to clean my side of the bed yet - I need to move a lamp, a night stand and my sewing stuff. It'll take me or DH less than 5 minutes to do it. And our nephews? What the heck am I supposed to do about them? They sleep over almost every weekend...make them aware that LOs can wake up crying and that if they're here they may get woken up?

DH and I have talked to her about her incessant need to talk about LO. We've told her that we're the parents and we will worry about where to put her clothes and sleeping location, etc. We've even talked to FIL and had him talk to her alone and with us (more united) but she doesn't stop. I'm almost at my wit's end. I'm so tempted to take our tax return and dump it all into an apartment so that we can move before LO arrives.

Mrs Babs · February 2010

Ugh MIL! At least DH is standing up to her though. She obviously needs to step back and realize its your baby not hers.

mopsie · February 2010

Look on the bright side... at least the C's won!!!

jdmiller28 · February 2010

If you took your tax return and got an apartment for yourselves, can you afford it? I'm not sure what your situation is - so I don't mean to pry. I don't think this'll get any better as long as you're living with them. It's her house and she's got it in her head that she can decide how everything can be set up in her house. I wouldn't doubt if she takes on some parenting responsibilities as well as grandparent after LO arrives.

Sorry - that's not much help, but I hope things get better for you.

bancbev · February 2010

This would simply be solved by moving. It sounds like you are staying there to save money, which it's great you able to do that. But as long as you are there in her house, you cannot expect her to change the way she is or thinks.

maryenap · February 2010

You are a strong woman, I'm freaking out that my MIL wants to stay with us for 2 days. Hang in there!

Butterbean52 · February 2010

If I were you, I'd move. The expense would be worth it to decrease the stress. You two are having a baby, so you are old enough to run your own household.

flippy1234 · February 2010

I would also move... my MIL was living with us for 3 years, we just bought a house last September and she was crushed when we told her she couldn't move in with us. Sure we were saving money before having her pay 1/3 of our bills... but its so much better now.