2nd Trimester

Why Would Someone Say This

So when I picked my students up from the lunchroom today, one of the monitors said, "Mrs. P, are you having a girl?"  I told her that my ultrasound wasn't until next week.  She then proceeded to tell me that she thought I was having a girl because I have gained SOOOO much weight in my hips and butt.  For real???

First of all, I have only gained about 8 pounds, and it's all in my boobs and belly!!  Secondly, why would someone say this?

My coworker told me to ask her what she was having (she's pretty heavy - not pregnant) cause he heard her say this to me.  I'm used to people giving me random advice, but not just blurting out insults!  Luckily I had 26 pairs of little eyes on me, so I held my tongue!

Re: Why Would Someone Say This

  • Someone said that to me at 16 weeks.  I was super annoyed, but I was still in a size 4.  I think some women just like to see smaller ladies gain weight when they are pregnant.

    DD1 born 5/24/10.

    Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.

    DD2 born 5/14/13.

    Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.

    Expecting someone new 4/17/17.
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  • OMG!! Some people are SO rude!!  I'm sorry you had to put up with that!
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  • ?? Who teaches a little kid to say things like that? It was funny when my mom told me my ass got bigger, but it's not funny when it's a stranger.
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  • It is amazing how rude people can be when you're pregnant. Sometimes I wonder if they even realize how they sound, or they think it's okay to say things like this since we're pregnant?? Jeesh.
  • Ugh Confused

    Something about a pregnant belly makes people lose their filters.  It's like that quote (which I'm sure I'll totally butcher) - 'It's better to remain quiet and have others assume your stupid, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."

    bfp 5/17/09 - missed m/c 6/17/09 @ 9w - stopped growing 6w 1d, D&C 6/19/09
    BFP #2 10/13/2009 on our 2nd Wedding Anniversary
    Discovered TWINS during the 6w u/s - what a shocker!
    Delivered on 5/19/2010 at 34 weeks due to pre-e and HELLP syndrome
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  • imagemeangene:
    ?? Who teaches a little kid to say things like that? It was funny when my mom told me my ass got bigger, but it's not funny when it's a stranger.

    It wasn't a kid....an adult monitoring the lunchroom.  But all my little kiddos were standing there. 

    Agreed - family members are allowed to comment because they are fully aware of the wrath that may follow!  Strangers, comment at your own risk!

  • imagesuepotsy:

    imagemeangene:
    ?? Who teaches a little kid to say things like that? It was funny when my mom told me my ass got bigger, but it's not funny when it's a stranger.

    It wasn't a kid....an adult monitoring the lunchroom.  But all my little kiddos were standing there. 

    Agreed - family members are allowed to comment because they are fully aware of the wrath that may follow!  Strangers, comment at your own risk!

     I have to learn how to read... Sorry :)

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  • imagemeangene:
    imagesuepotsy:

    imagemeangene:
    ?? Who teaches a little kid to say things like that? It was funny when my mom told me my ass got bigger, but it's not funny when it's a stranger.

    It wasn't a kid....an adult monitoring the lunchroom.  But all my little kiddos were standing there. 

    Agreed - family members are allowed to comment because they are fully aware of the wrath that may follow!  Strangers, comment at your own risk!

     I have to learn how to read... Sorry :)

    It's okay!  Easy mistake!  I rhink it's worse that it's an adult - she should have known better!

  • Someone would say this because they have nothing better to do than be a dumbass! I'm sure she was just being spiteful. I don't understand why any negative comment comes out of another person's mouth when speaking to a pregnant woman. My coworkers harrassed me b/c I didn't start showing until two weeks ago substantially... you can't live up to everyone's expecations or apparently measure up! Some people are just mean. I hope you aren't too hurt by what she said because it obviously was unnecessary!

    You keep that baby happy & healthy and forget about the dumbies that may surround you!! Smile

  • There is this OWT that if you gain a lot of weight in just the belly region then your are having a boy and if you gain weight all over then it will be a baby girl. Unfortunatly a lot of women - especially women in my mother's generation and my grandmother's generation - feel that this is a standard that all womens bodies must abide by no matter what and they feel like its ok to say these sorts of things. My own mother told me that she thinks I'm having a girl because I'm so big all over and when I showed her the pics from our ultrasound showing our little boy's "hootie" she still said "But you're so big!" In all honesty I do look huge but I haven't gained any weight, in fact I still have 8lbs to gain to get back to my pre-preggers weight and I'm six months!!!

    Don't worry too much about what others say. Just focus on the fact that even if you gain 100lbs you are still going to be the most beautiful person in the world to your LO!  

  • I'm proud of you for keeping your cool, that must've been difficult. People are horribly rude at times, but I agree with pp, it seems as though larger people take advantage of the opportunity to see smaller women gaining weight.

    When I first found out I was pg, I told a girlfriend of mine and she said 'I knew something was up, your face is a lot fatter and you just seem more plump'. I politely explained how I'd actually lost 8 pounds from food aversions due to m/s. I don't remember exactly what else I told her, but I'm sure it wasn't very nice.

  • Wow! I don't know if I could have handled that situation as well as you did. I don't know what it is about pregnancy but people definitely think they can comment or offer advice about everything! 
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