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How do you spoil a newborn.

jdreams76jdreams76 member
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Since I have had DS everyone is always saying OH HE IS SPOILED! Why because I hold him when he cries and try to find out what he needs? Or now that he is almost 3months old he loves to cuddle with me and not you when we are visiting (referring to all my family). It bothers me when people say that he is cared for not spoiled. It's funny the only one that doesn't say that he is is my MIL. Even though she does hold him while he is crying and tries to figure out what he needs on her own except most of the time when she stops by it's one of his feeding times and that's what he needs. Anyone else hear this a lot and get annoyed? Or am I just venting alone :P
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Re: How do you spoil a newborn.

  • ilovemyprinceilovemyprince
    I'd be annoyed too...IMO there's no such thing as spoiling a newborn!!!
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  • OCMom2009OCMom2009

    I know that used to be the thinking - that you could spoil a newborn but now the docs and nurses all say that's not true.

    In fact, I found something on the ed.gov site that says it's no longer the method of thinking. I had a talk with my parents about how when Sam cries it's because she needs something and that you can't spoil them and now they understand.

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  • PB&J1216PB&J1216
    I agree. I am soooo tired of hearing people tell me that it is ok and good to let a newborn cry. I don't know about the rest of you Momma's out there but my lil man hardly ever cries and when he does you know there is a reason for it. It isn't like he cries for no darn reason!!!!! I would like someone to comfort me everytime I cried? No? Grr... Sorry this is a sore subject for me too.
    Parker 12:09:09 Alyssa 5:31:12
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  • ilovemyprinceilovemyprince

    imagePB&J1216:
    I agree. I am soooo tired of hearing people tell me that it is ok and good to let a newborn cry. I don't know about the rest of you Momma's out there but my lil man hardly ever cries and when he does you know there is a reason for it. It isn't like he cries for no darn reason!!!!! I would like someone to comfort me everytime I cried? No? Grr... Sorry this is a sore subject for me too.

    This!!! I

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  • kob227kob227

    OMG I am seriously fed up with this, it's the one thing my mom constantly says that really bugs me.  And the one thing I agree with my MIL on, you can't spoil a newborn.

    And when I tell my mom I can't put DS down because he starts to cry and that he only really naps in my arms, she responds "Not spoiled, huh?"

    Well I've now found that DS like to sleep on his tummy, so I supervise his naps on his tummy and have no problem with him absolutely having to be in my arms.  

    I told her even if I was spoiling him, I want to give him all the love and comfort I can right now and if that means holding him when he wants me to, so be it.

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  • norunawaybridenorunawaybride
    I get annoyed too when I hear that I'm spoiling my DS if I don't let him CIO.  I don't understand how some people think that a tiny baby that has no cognitive ability can maniupulate adults into spoiling them!  Look at a baby's head size.  Their brain is not completely developed, and crying is a baby's only form of communication that is used for the sole purpose of survival: food, safety, and comfort.
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  • jshfjshf member

    imagenorunawaybride:
    I get annoyed too when I hear that I'm spoiling my DS if I don't let him CIO.  I don't understand how some people think that a tiny baby that has no cognitive ability can maniupulate adults into spoiling them!  Look at a baby's head size.  Their brain is not completely developed, and crying is a baby's only form of communication that is used for the sole purpose of survival: food, safety, and comfort.

    This!  Sometimes people make me feel like I am doing something wrong, but then I remind myself that DS is just communicating to me what he needs.  He doesn't know how to manipulate me yet.  Although when he smiles, I would do anything for him!  I don't know if that will ever change! 

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  • jdreams76jdreams76 member
    Thanks ladies! I needed to hear some reasonable people that understand. Not people that obviously did things another way 10years ago or more. My mom stopped by on her lunch break like she does daily during the week and we got into it again. I was standing in the kitchen bouncing my son and talking to her and she was like look at him he is spoiled! GAH! I just started in on her. I said how can you keep saying that when I tell you over and over I do not spoil him you cannot at this age etc etc. She flipped out on me and yelled and stormed out like a child. Pretty usual for my mom. I had my daughter 14yrs ago and she was never a part of her life and she says it was because she was a young grandma.. So was my husbands mom but she and my daughter have a great relationship. Thanks for letting me vent.
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  • BratNatBratNat

    They wont want to be snuggled by mom when they go off to college.  LO will never be 7 days old again.  Even if I am spoiling him--who cares.

     

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