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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
FFFC
This discussion has been closed.
Re: FFFC
It has been mentioned in a very casual sense several times, like oh i wish they could move to tx, they could just stay here etc etc, but now they are for sure moving out in march and this was something DH discussed with his friend (the friend and wife talk to each other a lot more than DH and i do). I don't really have a say in most things. Perhaps another confession, but a big part of me hopes that things WILL go horribly wrong between DH and i and there will finally be a good enough reason to leave.
I am sorry you are going through a rough time. I hope you and your DH can come to an agreement about getting the help that you may need.
As far as going to church alone and pregnant - I've done it. My DH is also not into church and I know that I need to go for myself and for my DS. I know a lot of couples where only one of them attends church, so it is ok. I hope no one judges you - it is CHURCH, for crying out loud!
My confessions --
1. Our Christmas tree is STILL UP. I feel like we are such deadbeats. DH has been working a ton and I was sick for a while earlier in the month and it just hasn't gotten taken down yet.
2. I totally don't feel like showering or doing anything work-related today (I work from home, so I can get away with being gross).
It must be a southern thing. If a child said "yes ma'am" to me, I would definitely think that was a little weird. I will teach DS to respect his elders and to say "please" and "thank you", but I've never been a fan of "ma'am" and "sir". It's just not a part of our culture around here.
i totally agree with you on all of this! i get the same crap about the fact that dd is nearly completely potty trained and she can count and say some of the alphabet. it's not like i strapped her to the damnn potty and made her potty train, she just did it.
i was suprised too, maybe it's because i was a navy brat, but in my household we said yes mam and yes sir to adults, it's just how we were raised and i still find myself saying it a lot of the time.
Thanks for the kind words. This church is amazing and accepts everyone so I don't think I'll be judged, but I just feel weird about it.
I took my tree down yesterday, lol! Only because big trash was today and I would have to wait another month if I missed it.
I totally agree with the bolded part. I don't care what anyone else does but I can't imagine not teaching Nicholas to say ma'am and sir either. I think it's just ultra polite and classy if a child or anyone for that matter uses ma'am or sir in response to someone, anyone.
To this day I still use ma'am and sir in response to everyone, the drive-thru person at McDonalds, the customer rep on the phone from the cable company, etc, etc.
It could be my TX upbringing who knows. I'm brining the sir and ma'am to MD though.
Also, I feel kind of bad for my DS. Expectations are going to be very high for him, especially from grandparents. Both DH and I (and our siblings) were honor students and did very well in school. Now that DS is clearly speech delayed, I can't help but think about the fact that he might not follow suit (though I realize speech and intelligence don't have to be tied together).
I think that most people who apply themselves can be "good" students, like a B student, but in our families I know that would be a disappointment, and I'm already worried about DS picking up on that kind of negativity. As long as he is a hard worker, that will always be good enough for me. I just hope other people will mind their own business.
Me too!! Absolutely.
The Mouse ~ 06.12.08 | The Froggy ~ 02.23.11
It is very southern and very much a part of the military culture. DD will be taught this as well. And if an adult says they can call them by the first name it will be Miss, Mrs, or Mr. In front of it.
Shes a gem... but unfriending her would cause more drama!
Yes, I am a military brat as well, so I'm sure that adds to my emphasis on it. And absolutely any adult will be a 'Miss' or 'Mr'. Our DCP is 'Miss Debbie'. (not her real name, but you know what I mean)
The Mouse ~ 06.12.08 | The Froggy ~ 02.23.11
Definitely.
i didn't respond to any of it yesterday, but i think saying "yes ma'am/sir" to other adults is fine (although for ME, it makes me feel weird so i just ask kids not to), but i would never make my child respond to me that way. I think saying "yes" instead of answering, "yeah" is something that all kids should be taught. that's a personal pet peeve of mine.
re: the ma'am, sir thing, I got the vibe that most people were against children addressing their PARENTS like that on a regular basis, not other adults. I'll teach Kat to give other adults that respect, but i don't want to be ma'am, I want to be Mommy. but not Mommie.
Yes, Mommie Dearest!
a confession of my own..... I'm letting MIL babysit tomorrow, which doesn't happen very often (they live 3 hours away, we are going there to go out with friends for a special occasion). I'm probably going to piss her off, but I'm nervous about her giving kiddo her bath. She's so absent minded, I worry she'll wander off. So I'm going to tell her straight out to not leave kiddo in the bathroom alone, and probably offend her. Oh well.
#1- I feel like a horrible person/mom even saying this.....but I really hope the next baby is a girl just to piss of my mother in law! Because I honestly don't care either way, but I know she is just banking on us having a boy. She is an evil person and human being! OBVIOUSLY my first and foremost is that I want a healthy baby.
#2- I faked nausea the other night at 3 am so DH would get up with DD, and it was a work nght for him..........so now I feel bad but I was so exhuasted and couldn't imagine getting out of bed!
Both of these things make me a horrible mommy lately I realize this!
My DH has been OOT since Monday. People keep acting all judgey about the fact that he's on vacation without us. I TOLD him to go and enjoy himself. Apparently this is a foreign concept, because one friend actually called him a selfish ass!
I keep getting asked if I'm lonely. Yeah, I miss him, but with Alaina here and another toddler 50 hours a week, I don't have time to get "lonely." I'm too busy. Although tonight when he walks in, he's gonna be in for it.
We're Tigra and Bunny and we like the boom.
Thanks! Now I have that song in my head.
I don't know how much of this is really a confession as much as a vent, but here goes. Today is our 5 year anniversary and I'm really not happy about our situation. Not our marriage, but our living/financial/stuff like that. We are in worse shape than when we got married. We are fed and housed, and I see all this coverage of Haiti and feel like an ungrateful brat. Ugh, I guess I just don't know how to feel. Situations like this are really relative and when most people we hang out with are fairly well off and going off on vacations and buying whatever they want, well, its hard. The last trip we went on alone was our honeymoon 5 years ago. Boo.
Anyway, this is just my brain unloading. I need to go donate to the Red Cross now and remember how lucky I truly am.
After that it was "Good Vibrations" such a sweeeet sensation!
Yeah, I'll be both. If my mom or dad asked me a question growing up, I always answered with a m'am or sir.
"Did you put away your laundry?" "Yes M'am"
Of course I'll be Momma too. And definitely no 'yeah' s or 'uh huh' s. Won't fly in my house. I guess I do kinda sound like a drill sergeant, but thats just how I was raised.
The Mouse ~ 06.12.08 | The Froggy ~ 02.23.11
For me, it's definitely a Southern thing. I was taught yes please and no thank you. I have cousins that grew up in Ocala, Fl and they were taught yes ma'am and no sir. I remember staying summers with them and when my Aunt called them they had to answer with "Ma'am". I actually thought it was kind of neat. Very respectful. Well one summer I had to stay by myself with them and my Aunt pulled me to the side and asked if I could refer to her as ma'am. I was 12 or 13 at the time and I was kind of embarrassed. I mean, I was saying yes please not like I was saying yup or yeah.
Anyway, I will raise my children to be polite. Not sure if I'll make them say ma'am and sir. But they definitely will be taught manners and to be respectful of their elders. Any adult other than family will be Miss, Mrs, or Mr first name.
We have a fairly woodsy backyard and I may just chuck it behind the shed! I am TOO embarassed to leave it out front for the trash collectors!
I hope your relationship improves with your DH. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm sorry you're going through a rough time with YH. FWIW, I go to church with my son, obviously pregnant and without my husband - and I've never given it a second thought. Try not to stress about that.
I think most people meant it was weird to make your kid address YOU that way, not other adults. I want Ainsley to say yes ma'am to other women, but she doesn't need to say it to me. If I tell her to clean her room and she does, that's good enough for me.
I think thats all thats important, being polite.
I don't have any issue with parents NOT teaching their kids to say m'am or sir, but the number of people who had an issue with ME doing it is what confused the hell outta me.
The Mouse ~ 06.12.08 | The Froggy ~ 02.23.11
i think that sort of thing is just power trippy bullsh!t. bad form on your aunt's part.
Yeah, I agree. Thats just plain ridiculous. My parents would have said something to me, but not any of my other relatives.
The Mouse ~ 06.12.08 | The Froggy ~ 02.23.11
I am taking the boys to the movies tomorrow.
This is flameworthy because I am not taking them because I want to do something nice for them, I am taking them because I want to go see the movie. I am just using them as an excuse. Dh knows me too well he totally called me on it but he doesn't care. It's not like they will know that. I am totally going to play it up like I am doing it for them
But really it is for me
oh and my cheap butt is taking them for free with the free movie coupons from the boxes of lucky charms they have been eating! taking kids to the movies is sooo expensive!
I think that is the most improtant thing. Both my parents were 4.0 students all through college and I barely got a 3.4. But the big thing has always been that my parents only asked us to do our best. That built in me an internal drive to do everything in my power to do the best job possible.
Although I don't agree with the sir and ma'am part, I do agree with using Miss or Mr in front of adults names. DD's sitter is Miss Kim.
oh alli, i'm sorry:( things are never perfect, but i really hope counseling works out for both of you. if you need anything or need anyone to talk to, please let me know...i'm here for you. if are catholic i would tell you to come to church with us:)
This in bold. Underlined for emphasis. Last night sitting watching what those people are going through just made me cry. I looked over at DH after they showed one little girl who ahd been burned & his bottle lip was curled down like he was going to start himself. It's just horrible. They might have had/have their problems but no one, no one deserves that. Especially the fact that the majority of the population there is children.
I don't want to keep quoting but I don't get how anyone can say that anybody deserved what happened.
The DR and Haiti have been hit so hard this decade. They might be a third world and poor country but that doesn't mean they deserve anything. No one "deserves" that. What could those poor people have done to deserve that?
The saddest part is they are so poor those buildings don't have building code like we do here they are made out of concrete and boards. If it had happened to a richer city with better equipped buildings there wouldn't be as much devastation. If anything imo those people are the last people who would "deserve" something like that.
Pure awesomeness