Severe anxiety over DD's well-being
I am always on edge about the well-being of DD. If DH is taking care of her, I always have to look and see what they are doing. I have never left her with anyone else but DH, and never longer than an hour. When we go out in public, I keep her sunshade over her face so people can't see her our touch her. The holidays were horrible for me, and I was so looking forward to them while pregnant. I hated anyone but me holding her, I would cringe when someone would kiss her face, and when she cried I would get so stressed out. I have this insanely guilty conscience, so when she is upset I feel like I am diliberatly doing something to her. On top of all this, I keep picturing in my head bad things happening to her. Like, I will lay her down to sleep, then think "oh, what if she rolled over against the bumper and can't breathe and suffocates" or I will be walking along with her and picture dropping her. I don't know why I do this, but I can't stop! I keep thinking up these ridiculous scenarios in which she gets hurt or worse.
Is anyone else experiencing something similar? This has totally blindsided me. I have dealt with depression before, but never anything like this. If I leave the house with her, it has to be with DH because I can't handle being in public with her alone!
Re: Severe anxiety over DD's well-being
i'm sorry you are dealing with this. Have you spoken to a doctor yet?
I've had some of the same problems as well. I always think she has some disease or something is developmentally wrong with her. I always imagine worst case scenarios, like if I'm driving and in an accident. Or if I trip and fall with her. Or her not waking up in the morning. It's horrible but I've definitely been getting better about blockingout these thoughts with the help of medication and therapy.
Good luck and I hope you start feeling better soon.
This is EXACTLY what I am going through... plus a whole lot of saddness, guilt about returning to work, etc.