Telling your child about IVF?

Renesmee · December 2009

I am working on my daughter's baby book and there are lots of questions about how we found out we were pregnant, first ultrasound, etc. It got me thinking...are you telling your child they are an IVF baby? I don't know if I should talk about IVF, or just kinda ignore that in her baby book and just gloss over the details of lots of ultrasounds, finding out bloodwork results from RE, etc. I don't know if I am going to hide it from her, but I also dont know if I want to talk about it in her baby book... I just can't decide!

lnle · December 2009

renesmee - you're back!! congrats on your baby girl!

I think since we're having 3, I'll probably come clean about IVF. spontaneous triplets happen, but not often!

Renesmee · December 2009

Yes I am back! I can't believe you are over halfway done! You must be so excited! And I guess you will have to come clean - lol. I hope you are having a great pregnancy. I can't imagine having three babies kicking me all at once. One was enough for me. Ha ha!

GypsyEsq · December 2009

We had planned on an IUI but got canceled and then lucky on a medicated cycle that the RE believed had failed -- the whole story is in DD's baby book.

desabean · December 2009

I was actually just looking at my scrapbook and wondering if I'd been *too* honest....I am absolutely not going to hide it from anyone...but it could (will) be pretty confusing at an early age but I guess it will work itself out somehow. I just think that any confusion it may cause early on will definitely be replaced by a greater understanding and appreciation of how badly we wanted her when she is older. That doesn't necessarily mean you need to put it in a baby book....but I did and I'm ok with that decision. But I plan to be very honest about a lot of things with her (we'll see how some of the rest of that goes ; ) .

somethingchangd · December 2009

I plan on telling him. Like Desabean, I think it will help him to know just how much he was wanted. I (personally) can't imagine lying to him about it. We're not ashamed - as a matter of fact, I have some pride that we fought so hard to get him.

The only photo in his room is of him (and his would-be sibling) as a blastocyst. His first baby pic!

ela81 · December 2009

I have the IVF info in my DDs baby book, like "when did you first suspect you were pg?".......When the RE put 3 embies in me:) I'm not worried about it, everbody we know is aware of what we went through for her. I figure even if ppl did not know it's her baby book so it's not something that is sitting out on the coffee table for everybody to see. All of that said you have to do what will work for you.

tina623 · December 2009

I'll tell them. It's in their baby book. My aunt had a hard time having my cousins and she was always open with everyone saying "it took me 6 years to get pg" and it didn't affect my cousin (who got pg first month trying .. ).

becca2325 · December 2009

Hey Renesmee!! Congrats on your baby!! I can't wait for mine to get here.

I plan to tell her about IVF but maybe later when she can understand better. I definitely won't keep it a secret- most people already know so I'd hate for her to hear it from someone else. I plan to put her embie pic in where the baby book asks for first pic, but just not get into detail about the IVF.

mrspresley · December 2009

i didn't do IVF but just wanted to say congrats!! our babies were born a day apart

Temp848906437505510 · December 2009

Yes, and she will also know that a very special woman donated her eggs to us so that we could have her.

kimarino13 · December 2009

I definitely plan to tell mine. I think the journey to get them was amazingly hard and wonderful at the same time, and something I am happy and proud to share.

Mrs.Babbsy · December 2009

kimarino13:
I definitely plan to tell mine. I think the journey to get them was amazingly hard and wonderful at the same time, and something I am happy and proud to share.

This and all the awesome friends I met along the way! that can't be replaced. I even found a cousin (Hannah) of mine during this journey.

skoorbnibor · December 2009

well, since his baby book has about 23 u/s pics in it, I will tell him everything!

AvaLikeLava · December 2009

Yes. I certainly plan to tell him. We are not embarrassed by it in one bit, and it's part of what makes him so special.

One of our holiday tree ornaments is his embryo photo. We're not hiding it by any means, so one day when he asks "what is that?" I get to say "that's you, when you were 3 days old!"

roaringrock · December 2009

of course we will tell ginny about IVF. why wouldn't we?! being infertile is nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of.

MBandBud · December 2009

I am sure we will share this information at some point, but I, too, struggled over what to put in my pregnancy journal. I do have all the information, and I did answer all the questions honestly, but I do believe there will be a right time to share this. This may actually depend on dc's growth and when it comes up. The timing may be right to include the details, or we may want to share the regular pg stuff first. It all depends. The info will get shared but I get waiting and I don't think you need to decide right now on that. Best wishes and thank you for validating my wonder on the right thing to do.

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