Bad Christmas spirit. — The Bump
Postpartum Depression

Bad Christmas spirit.

Finally had my blood drawn this morning.  I am anxiously awaiting the results.  I will be finding out if a thyroid problem or vitamin deficiency is leading to my depression. 

My increased dose of Zoloft is helping some, but I had a rough day today.  I broke down over my lack of Christmas spirit.  I feel like such a failure.  I worry that I have ruined Allie's first Christmas.  I bought cards and wallet photos of Allie, and there they sit, unsigned and not mailed out.  I have no Christmas tree...not a single decoration up.  I went on a marathon shopping spree with DH yesterday, but no gifts are wrapped.  I got no cookies baked.  I am dreading going to visit family.  I felt for a moment that I would be better off dead than having to suffer through this holiday in which I have failed to accomplish any of the normal festivities.  I am just feeling so down on myself right now.

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Re: Bad Christmas spirit.

  • Rest assured that NO ONE remembers their first Christmas. So you can't really screw that up. I have nothing for DS because we are broke,he has quite enough, and he won'y know what the heck is going on anyway.

    You cannot fail Christmas. The holidays shouldn't be about forcing yourself to do a bunch of junk that you don't want to do. No one will die if there are no Christmas cookies (actually their waistline will thank you). Wrapping gifts? A waste of time and paper. Save your cards for next year (now you are prepared for next year) and hand out the pictures of your DD when you see people.

    Dreading to see family? Can't help you there. I'm dreading that too. 

    When you are feeling depressed, getting out of bed, feeding yourself, showering, on top of taking care of a child are major accomplishments. Cut yourself a break. Think about what you'd tell a friend who was feeling the same way. In 2 days it will all be over. 

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