My Worst Fear Came True

ikissedthecook · December 2009

Friday afternoon I came home from work to just a tiny bit of spotting when I wiped. Saturday morning it was gone. By Saturday evening it returned again. Around 3pm on Sunday it turned to bright red bleeding. DH rushed me to the E.R. where they ran blood and urine tests, along with an u/s. On the u/s I got to see what I had been waiting to see ever since I got the BFP - my LO's heartbeat! I thought the moment would be a huge sigh of relief, but since I was till bleeding I was till a little worried. After talking to the E.R. doctor, he reassured me everything was going to be fine. My cervix was completely closed, my baby looked great, and the heartbeat was strong. My HCG levels were a little low at 3291 but he said not to worry. He felt I was going to be okay. He put me on 48 hour bed rest and felt confident the bleeding would stop by then. I called my OB Monday morning and the doctor had seen my u/s. They too felt there was no need to come in because my u/s looked so good. Well, I continued bleeding through Monday night. Tuesday it started to pick up just little so I called back. They told me to come in at 3pm for another u/s. At exactly 1pm intense cramping like I have never had hit and I started to lose clots of blood. By my u/s at 3:30, my uterus was empty. I had undergone a complete miscarriage.

I have been through a lot of crap in my life, but this has to be the biggest heartbreak I've ever been through. DH and I have decided the best way for us to deal with our pain is to start trying as soon as possible. That being said, I'm a little confused where to go from here. Any board reccomendations would be greatly appreciated. Good luck to all you ladies and I hope to be back here very soon!

EllePost · December 2009

omg I am so sorry for your loss! Thoughts and prayers to you and I hope you are back here soon.

erincon8 · December 2009

T & P. I'm so sorry. Best of luck and I hope you will be back here very soon!

someflower6 · December 2009

oh hun, i am so sorry to hear this. a loss is devestating. each one is unique, and you and your husband will grieve this loss in your own way. however, i know when i had mine, i found great support on the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board.

trying again is a personal decision, but make sure you are ready for it not only emotionally, but physically. your doctor will advise you on when you'll get the green light to try again.

best of luck to you.

bedebum13 · December 2009

I'm so sorry for your loss. Try the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board (you mentioned looking for support boards). Best of luck to you and DH.

CAMbaby10 · December 2009

So sorry!!! That is my worst fear! Good luck and hope you get pregnant again real soon!

KelleyA · December 2009

I am so sorry for your loss.

apaul1208 · December 2009

I"m very sorry you had to go through this. My T&P are with you and your DH.

I agree trying again is a personal decision. My DH and I tried again after one menstrual cycle, but that was a decision we made together.

I got most of my support from two friends that had gone through it and talking to my DH.

Best of luck to you and I hope to see you back here as soon as you are ready!

DanceDeva4 · December 2009

I wish I could say something to comfort you. Please know you and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so sorry for your loss.

leatrez · December 2009

I went through the same thing during my first pregnancy which ended in miscarriage in October. I went to the ER they did an ultrasound and put me on bed rest said everything will be fine. They called it a threatened miscarriage. The bleeding continued and when I saw my doctor she told me I was having a miscarriage. After feeling depressed for three weeks, DH and I decided to try again as soon as possible. I purchased OPK's and as soon as I got one that was positive DH and I tried again and I got my BFP exactly one month after my miscarriage. I never received AF after my first miscarriage.

The miscarriage/pregnancy loss board was a great support for me. I would definitely recommend this board as well as TTC after a loss. Hang in their I know you will get another BFP. I hope to see you soon on Pregnant after a loss.

RivieraMaya05 · December 2009

I really am so sorry. I've been there and you are right, there is no pain like the loss of a baby. DH and I started trying again right away (after I was cleared from the Dr) even though I wasn't really ready in my heart. I am glad now that he nudged me to TTC so soon. We did get PG again right away which is pretty common with women who have had a m/c.

You should wait a month to regulate your cycle and to make sure your uterine lining is restored.

luckygirl13 · December 2009

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I had a natural m/c at the end of August and my doctor recommended we wait one cycle to try again. I was blessed with a BFP when we started trying again. I hope the same for you and you'll be back here very soon! I visited the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board and it is full of great advice. Everyone there understands what you are going through. I wish that board didn't have to exist at all. Take care. (((hugs)))

EricsWife2005 · December 2009

IKTC, I am so very sorry for your loss.

14years · December 2009

I am so very sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself and your DH. ((HUGS))

mchell9 · December 2009

I am so so sorry for your loss...my thoughts and prayers are with you and your husband during this difficult time. I understand wanting to ttc asap b/c you think that it will bring you back where you left off, but just take one day at a time. It is a lot to go through emotionally and your body has to adjust too. You will find great support on the m/c board and the ttcal board as well. They have been great boards for me. Sending you ((BIG HUGS))

wickedwitchofthewest · December 2009

I am so sorry for your loss. Knowing that i would be trying again asap was what helped me get my losses too. It's amazing how much pain it causes. Good luck to you.

grace416 · December 2009

Im sorry for your loss,I really hope to see you back here soon.

braylei · December 2009

I am so sorry for your loss.

kasslynne · December 2009

Nothing but T & P's to both of you.

KimW · December 2009

I'm so very sorry for your loss

ricejl · December 2009

I'm so sorry, I hope to see you again real soon!

DaniSev · December 2009

I am so sorry for your loss! The ladies on TTCAL and Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss are incredibly supportive from what I've heard. I hope to see you back here soon.

robyn2201 · December 2009

I'm sorry for your loss! T&P's coming your way.

DC+PittsburghBride · December 2009

I am so very sorry for your loss. I had a chemical pregnancy early on and the doctors do want you come in and see them. There is a risk of infection. Also, most will tell you to wait a cycle or two. You are going through one of the most painful things life presents and I send you thoughts and prayers.

Roxy80s · December 2009

I am so sorry for your loss. My T&P's go out to you and your DH.

mrs.g_6708 · December 2009

I am so sorry you had to go through that. I wish you the best of luck with ttc again.

Zista · December 2009

I am so sorry. What an incredibly difficult thing to go through. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

chrisgayle · December 2009

I'm so sorry. I felt the same about wanting to try again soon after my miscarriage last month. At the f/u visit 2 weeks after my d&c we were told that I was about to ovulate. We tried again & got pregnant right away which was weird because it had taken us so long the first time. I did some research & read that it's possible to be more fertile the first few months following a mc. Again, I'm so sorry for your loss- hugs to you!