Postpartum Depression
Colic and Guilt
Over the past couple of days, DS has been getting very very fussy around 4pm each day. Looking at his symptoms and consulting with my Mom has lead us to agree he probably has a slight case of colic. Well, I was researching colic and looked at the possible causes and one is excessive stress or anxiety in the household. Reading that was like someone stabbed me in the heart. Because I know that is me doing that to him. And though I am trying to stop the stress and anxiety, with the PPD and PPA it's so hard and now I am pretty sure its making my son miserable too. Making him physically ill. I feel like the worst mother and human being. I know I cannot help it, that it's not an intentional thing, but I feel awful!!! How do I deal with this? So far I have promised to try harder to not stress and be anxious but I am not sure I can really keep that promise. I just feel so damn guilty!!!!!!
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Re: Colic and Guilt
From my understanding of it, the cause of colic cannot be determined. Please don't think that you did it to him! Just think of it as something that happened, and something that you are going through together. Maybe instead of worrying about what you think you have done wrong, focus on what you can do right. You are there for your DS, able to soothe him in ways only mommy can!
Hopefully you are seeing a doctor and getting treated for the PPD/PPA. If not, please see someone. Getting well is one of the best things you can do for your DS. You are a good mommy for doing all you can to be the best mommy you can.