Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

Those Pg with #2

Do you feel as attached as you did when you were Pg with #1?

I was pretty much obsessed with #1, and I was SO attached etc.

This time its different. We tried and wanted the pg so bad, I am attached to the end result the baby but I am having a hard time because I dont have the same feelings I did with #1

I feel guilty over it. Its hard to explain as I am thrilled/excited and would be devastated if something were to happen but at the same time its so different then #1.

Perhaps its because I have only seen a "lima bean" looking baby? Perhaps because I havent felt any movement? Maybe its just me? I dont know

*sigh* am I alone?

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Re: Those Pg with #2

  • I felt the same way. I also had the same guilt about it. I think it is just different the 2nd time. Even once I felt movement, I didn't feel as big of a connection to the baby. I think there is just something about the 1st pregnancy/baby. The first time every thought seemed to revolve around the pregnancy and baby, and the second time I had DS to occupy my time. I don't know. I still feel guilty even typing this!
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  • I was happy, giggly and loved everyone during my first pregnancy. My health problems stopped dead in there tracks. This pregnancy is so different, I'm irritable, coping with much worse morning sickness and feeling tremendous guilt for not being there for my son. I'm already attatched but I'm petrified that I won't be able to really give them equal amounts of attention. Did that make any sense?
  • I just posted this earlier...I feel horrible because I hardly stop to think about this one.  I think it is because I feel more at peace, know what to expect and have a dd to run after.   I am absolutely thrilled about my pregnancy but don't have the daydreams I did with the first.   Hoping that as I get bigger, things will become different.  I feel guilty just typing this :(
  • yes I am feeling WAY guilty because although I am thrilled I feel alot different then I did when I was PG with Ashlyn.

    It was like my life revolved around being PG with Ash and this time my life revolves around being a mom and much more that I feel as if the PG is taking a back burner which makes me feel guilty!

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  • I think it is preparing us for a life time of guilt...jk:)...to be followed by a realization that life will be ok once the little one gets here.  Let the balancing act begin.
  • imagejuietbride:
    I was happy, giggly and loved everyone during my first pregnancy. My health problems stopped dead in there tracks. This pregnancy is so different, I'm irritable, coping with much worse morning sickness and feeling tremendous guilt for not being there for my son. I'm already attatched but I'm petrified that I won't be able to really give them equal amounts of attention. Did that make any sense?

    Makes sense completely!

    I often worry about how I will be able to give both 100% and I worry about loving another as much as I love Ashlyn, which I am sure will happen naturally.

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  • Im glad to know I am not alone.

    I tried to talk to DH about this a couple days ago and he didnt get it at all.

    To him he is just thrilled, the more the merrier and has 0 concerns about anything just hopes the baby is healthy.

    I was feeling really guilty and thought I might the only one.

    I know I am extremely happy (I keep saying that!) but I just cant seem to shake that I am not like ok now today the babies lips are forming, and were now the size of a grape like I was with my first PG all excited about EVERY little detail.

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  • I checked to see what size my baby was for the first time and freaked when I found out he/she is already a peach.   ::hangs head in fruit calendar shame::

  • imagenooniesgal:

    I checked to see what size my baby was for the first time and freaked when I found out he/she is already a peach.   ::hangs head in fruit calendar shame::

    A peach! Thats big! wow...

     

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  • imageKellyOsu23:

    Im glad to know I am not alone.

    I tried to talk to DH about this a couple days ago and he didnt get it at all.

    To him he is just thrilled, the more the merrier and has 0 concerns about anything just hopes the baby is healthy.

    I was feeling really guilty and thought I might the only one.

    I know I am extremely happy (I keep saying that!) but I just cant seem to shake that I am not like ok now today the babies lips are forming, and were now the size of a grape like I was with my first PG all excited about EVERY little detail.

    DH was in a hurry to get me pregnant and kept telling me we needed a sibling for DS right away. He was beyond thrilled when I showed him my BFP. He can't wait to hold this child and see DS with his younger sibbling. We are both the oldest and he wants to share that with DS. I feel completely out of synch with where this little one is in size and development. I just keep hoping fir happy and healthy baby. I'm trying to be ok with this. I love this child but I don't have the luxury to daydream this time.
  • imageKellyOsu23:

    yes I am feeling WAY guilty because although I am thrilled I feel alot different then I did when I was PG with Ashlyn.

    It was like my life revolved around being PG with Ash and this time my life revolves around being a mom and much more that I feel as if the PG is taking a back burner which makes me feel guilty!

     

    THIS!!! Exactly!!!

     

    DD1 7/10/08  DD2 8/11/10  DS 7/2/13

  • imagenooniesgal:

    I checked to see what size my baby was for the first time and freaked when I found out he/she is already a peach.   ::hangs head in fruit calendar shame::

    LOL I did this too a couple of weeks ago to find out baby was already the size of a lime.  With Kenley I looked every single week...multiple times!  I think it's like noonie said...with the first you day dream, don't know what to expect, etc.  With this, we know what is going to happen and we're just busy with a toddler running around.  I feel attached but I'm ready to start feeling movement...it'll make it more real and pleasant vs the nausea Smile
    DD 6/17/08, DD 6/9/10, DD 12/15/11
    BFP 5/24/13 - Natural MC 6/7/13
    BFP 8/13/13 - Natural MC 8/27/13
    Ovarian Mass = removal of left ovary & tube 9/13
    BFP 4/24/14 - Tubal Pregnancy 5/7/14
    Removal of  ruptured right tube 5/8/14
    IVF or adoption??
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