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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
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it has not been a good day

lpennie16lpennie16 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

We went to FIL's and there was a ton of people there. DS was sitting on the floor between my feet playing with a few toys while I ate. Other children (aged anywhere from 8 months to 3 years) would crawl or walk up to him, look at him and go away without talking to or playing with him. I am pretty sure it is because he didn't know they were there since they didn't speak so he didn't look at them or interact with them. He kept playing instead. He will obviously touch another child if he knows they are there or talk to them if they talk or make noise. Unfortunately today they didn't happen to.

I can't help but worry about his future, that people his age will take no interest in interacting/befriending him b/c of his disability. The lack of eye contact or any indication that he SEES them and is interested makes him a non-participant in the whole baby play thing. I just worry and it makes me sad.  thanks for listening.

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Re: it has not been a good day

  • LoriB00LoriB00 member

    That does sound really hard for him and for you! I imagine though that as he gets older he will be better able to "sense" that someone is near him.  He'll probably even be able to get a good idea about where they are.  I've always heard that people who lack one of their senses have almost hyper-senses for the rest.  

     

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  • 1MusicMaker1MusicMaker

    ::hugs::

    I am so sorry.  It is always hard to think about the struggles your child may have down the road, but all you can do is love them and prepare them the best you can.  You are a great mom and he is lucky to have you in his life to help him!!

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  • JodiandMickeyJodiandMickey

    Aw, I'm sorry that this happened. I understand your worry for him... it's only natural that you worry about his future. I work with kids with special needs and can pretty much tell you that MOST children are very kind. Sure, there are some kids who will be cruel but most of your son's classmates will look out for him and see through his disability. Just as you see your son first, they will too. Kids will amaze you sometimes with their generosity and ability to see who a person really is. I wish your family the best!

    P.S. If you find yourself in this situation again, there is no harm in explaining in kid-friendly terms that your DS cannot see them but can hear, feel, touch, etc. just like they can. 

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  • lpennie16lpennie16 member
    thank you ladies.
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  • JuneMommy2BJuneMommy2B
    I know that must have been tough, but I think its important to remember that at your DS's age (and the ages of the other kids for the most part) kids don't really play together. An 8 month old has no concept of not wanting to "play" with a child who can't see.  They engage in parallel play, where they play around, or next to, each other.  I think as they all get a bit older they'll become more interactive, and your son will be a part of that.  Even when I go to playdates, its interesting to watch the kids DD's age. They all play in the same area, but each one is doing her/his own thing.  Give it time, and don't worry. 
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  • mary5198mary5198
    I'm sorry - I can't imagine how hard it must be for you.
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  • ronnie dayronnie day

    Before we knew that Lucy's vision wasn't as bad as they originally told us, I had this fear too, and a lot of what happened was people would KNOW she couldn't see, so they would not play with her, like her cousins that were younger and stuff.

    I kinda got into the habit of saying things like, Lucy, your cousin so and so is here to play with you, or Lucy, your papa wants to hold you here you go, etc.  I just made it a habit to announce what was going on around her so she just always knew.

    Now that she does have vision, I catch myself still doing it.

    HTH and I am sorry, things will get better.  At the Nevada Blind Children's Foundation, there are so many kids there that know I am standing inches away from them when I haven't said a word.   He will learn to adjust and he will amaze you in so many ways, you will look back and wonder why you ever worried  :)

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  • J+OJ+O
    I'm sure that was difficult to watch.  When he gets older you can cue him in to the kids around him though.  You can say, "Sarah wants to play with you."  And he'll know.  But I know it is difficult to watch right now.  ((hugs))
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