TTC After a Loss

vent... sorry

I have a friend. We've been friends since 5th grade. I love her to death but she's so egocentric.

When I first found out I was pg I told her because she was at my house. The first words were "I Get to be the godmother" thanks hun. You know I've tried for over a year!!! 

Then I mc and I told her through text since I still wasn't speaking. All I got back was "No!!!"  then she never elaborated, just changed the topic to her school work.

Tonight we went out to Walmart (ha yes I do go there) and it came up briefly and she changed it to her on and off fVck buddy.

I was feeling pretty low tonight and I must be a masochist and looked up baby stuff. I don't know why i thought she'd help but this was an IM message.

julybug1591 (10:39:15 PM): sigh I think I'm going nutters
friend (10:39:19 PM): ?
julybug1591 (10:40:02 PM): I keep looking at baby stuff A) it makes me cry B) I don't know when/if I'll ever have a baby
friend (10:41:16 PM): thats normal
friend  (10:41:36 PM): i feel like i need to vomit
friend (10:41:41 PM): and i want to eat something but i cant stomach anything
julybug1591 (10:42:05 PM): that sucks
friend (10:42:49 PM): yeah
friend (10:44:39 PM): 'ughh i just had a thought
friend (10:44:42 PM): what if i have a polyp?
friend (10:44:48 PM): or a nodule
friend (10:45:21 PM): and there goes my theatre career
 
thanks dear for caring so much about me. Tell me who bought you those pg tests all through high school? ME! who bought you plan b last month because you were too stupid to us a condom? ME! who picks you up when he treats you poorly? ME!
 
uhg I'm sorry guys but I needed to vent somewhere

 

BFP #1 10/28/09 EDD 06/24/10- Miscarriage 11/2/09
BFP #2 11/30/09 EDD 08/12/10- Sophia Grace born 8/1/10
BFP #3 11/16/10 EDD 08/04/11- Samuel Richard born 7/28/11
BFP #4 01/04/12 EDD 09/19/12- Simon Nathaniel born 9/6/12
BFP #5 03/27/13 EDD 11/25/13- Savannah Lee born 11/18/13

Re: vent... sorry

  • That's annoying. A lot of times it seems people just don't know what to say or how to react. It's a really immature way to react, but maybe she just doesn't know what to say, or how to react, and is trying to change the subject so that *she* doesn't feel so awkward. Maybe tell her that sometimes you just need to vent and get it off your chest, and that her changing the subject makes it seem like she's discounting your problems.
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  • Dude, you need new friends.  Seriously.  Just because you've known someone since fifth grade doesn't mean you still have things in common.  I know that people don't always know what pain it is to go through a miscarriage, but your friends should be sympathetic or empathetic... and help to support you, whatever way that may be. 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageColindaP:
    That's annoying. A lot of times it seems people just don't know what to say or how to react. It's a really immature way to react, but maybe she just doesn't know what to say, or how to react, and is trying to change the subject so that *she* doesn't feel so awkward. Maybe tell her that sometimes you just need to vent and get it off your chest, and that her changing the subject makes it seem like she's discounting your problems.

    I agree with Colinda but I also agree that you don't ahve to be friends forever with some people. I had to cut some friends loose for hurting me...for some it was temporary and for other pretty much permanent.  You definitely need to tell her how she hurt you in the gentlest way possible (even though she may not deserve the consideration) so that she can maybe learn the right way to be a friend and to not be so self-centered.

    dd(Brianna) 11/01/94, ds(Bram)10/17/95, ds(Jesse)9/26/97, dd (Annie Ruth) 7/27/05 5mc Jan '08, May '08, Feb '09, Sept '09, Apr '11 "And can it be that in a world so full and busy, the loss of one weak creature makes a void in any heart, so wide and deep that nothing but the width and depth of vast eternity can fill it up." - Charles Dickens

    PAL/PGAL Welcome

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