Where to start?

samm1983 · November 2009

Where/How did you start? I think that it would be wise for us to start looking into new options for our family. I just have no idea where to start. Who should I talk to? Where can I get information? From the information I have found so far, I think that domestic adoption would be best for us.....I just don't know what to do next.

Thanks for any info you can give me. :-)

mrsdrkwaver · November 2009

Well to get started you have to look for a couple of agency in your area and sign up to go to their informational meetings. That will help you decide if you want to go with an agency or not and then you can choose which one you feel good about. Every agency does things a little different so find one that fits you. If you decide to go it alone find out from an agency what your state laws are what you need to do to do that. In most states you will still need a home study done by an agency then you can go alone after that if you which. When I say gone alone I mean you and a lawyer and a birthmother or go with an agency that will help you find a birthmother and help you with the whole process plus console the birthmother. You have to decide what is best for your family. Good luck in your journey.

lilmufish · November 2009

I would start by reading adoption for dummies and read some of the posts on this board. These ladies are great. GL, welcome aboard!

Jessie*J · November 2009

It's overwhelming at first .... well I have had many overwhelming times this whole journey lol.

I looked on the internet .... I am STILL looking on the internet for options b/c we ran into a bad agency situation and we're basically back at square one after over a year of waiting with them!

This board is great. So many ladies and different situations.

Right now my husband and I are emailing a few different attorneys who work soley with private adoption. We feel that's the best way to go now.

I wish you the best!!! Take it one day and step at a time and you'll do fine!

K8-B · November 2009

Everything the PPs have said, definitely. I started by googling adoption agencies in the town where I live. There are 7! We go to our first information meeting next week, and I'm so excited. We also emailed or called all the agencies and had them send us their packet of information.

Also if you know anyone IRL how has adopted they are invaluable especially is they used an agency in your area.

Stay on this board, too. There is a lot of information here. Oh, one more thing, I have also been reading blogs with adoption stories. This has been very interesting for me as well.

Good luck with your journey!

ColoRxGirl · November 2009

Welcome. Please accept my condolences on your losses - your siggy looks similar to my history. Here's to taking aspirin and B-vitamins for the rest of our lives. . .

First, I would give yourselves a little time to process giving up on conceiving for a while. That, in itself, is a loss to be grieved. DH and I and took about a year off from the whole process and did some things just for ourselves before diving into adoption. Not saying this is the right path for everyone - but the grief component of IF should be acknowledged. And many agencies will want to know how you're dealing with this before approving you.

When you're ready - start your research. Lot of great books and resources out there - I also keep a list in my blog (link in siggy). For us, our first stop was the internet for some agency and state law info, then a trip to a good attorney. He helped direct us to reputable agencies, which we then selected from.

Best of luck and please post whatever questions you have.

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