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Northern California Babies
Questions: Pediatricians...(amyf I would LOVE for you to weigh in)
I have been researching pediatricians lately and have compiled a very short list of ones that I wish to meet...a couple of them do not have children of their own; I feel like having a child doesn't mean you would be a better pedi...but part of me also thinks having a child and experiencing some of the struggles might make it easier for the pedi to identify with DH and I....
So my questions:
1. Did it matter to you if your pedi had kids?
2. Why/Why not?
3. If you switched pedi's later...did it have anything to do with them having children or not?
(amyfelice, I would LOVE it if you would be willing to share your thoughts on this, as a pedi...and especially as one who has gone from not having children to having them)
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Questions: Pediatricians...(amyf I would LOVE for you to weigh in)
It didn't matter to me if our pedi had kids or not, I want them to give me medical advice, not personal advice.
We switched pedis because we moved, previous pedi had kids, current doesn't, and I haven't seen any difference in the care we receive.
It didn't matter to me if he had kids or not. I was more concerned about how he and I would mesh vs his own personal experience with kids.
ETA: I thought for sure before I opened this that you were going to ask "what questions should I ask" and I was prepared to post my list! HA!
It wasn't a priority to me but I completely understand what you mean. I do think that there is going to be an increased ability to be empathetic about situational things if your pedi has children of their own but it's not going to affect their abilities to provide quality medical care.
This.
::My Blog:: ::My Pinterest::
1. It only depends on their attitude to whether you, as the parent, are in charge of your child and their medical treatment. When my first pedi started to chime in on his opinion of something (based on being a parent), I counter argued. Then he said, "You sound like my mother." Then I said, "Well you turned out to be a doctor so I would say she did a damn fine job raising you." He shut up after that.
2. See above.
3. We switched but it had more to do with the lack of responsiveness. I think I caught wind of the fact that he wasn't into it like he use to be because a few months later his office shut down.
Interesting question. I have been asked over the years if I have kids, sometimes in a confrontational manner, as an insinuation that I would never suggest such an invasive test if I did, such as urine cath or a spinal tap.
I don't think the pediatrician necessarily has to have kids to understand what parents go through. For me, it was extremely helpful to have best friends with children. I got to see them very frequently and could see the things that parents need to do to get through tough times, etc, and could bend my "rules" when I saw how important it is to be flexible and how each child has individual needs. Does that make sense?
I have asked my colleagues over the years if having children changed the way they practice medicine, as in tests, treatments, etc, and the answer has universally been no, it has not. We are generally a child-loving, empathetic group and I think, as someone mentioned, experience is probably a lot more important.
If someone is rigid and totally clueless, then they probably don't have any nieces, nephews or friends with children either. I don't think I will do anything super different. In fact we are trained to NOT say 'If it were my child this is what I would do", because it implies a lack of objectivity and you are not supposed to treat your own child for just that reason. Also everyone has different values and cultural background and you can't say what another person should so with their child based on your own background. You can just say what you recommend and give them their other options if they don't accept that.
Our first pedi in Marin didn't have kids and we LOVED her. She was my age, if not a few years younger, single, and totally stylish and adorable. Like a little too good looking to be around in the early PP days. We're on our 4th pedi now through various moves, and that first one is still our favorite.
So having kids vs. not having kids was never in the consideration set for us, and the one that didn't have any ended up being the best we've seen yet.
I've never asked our pedis if they have kids and so honestly I don't even know if ours has kids. She's pretty young...maybe younger than me...so I get the feeling she doesn't. It doesn't make a difference to me.
We had to switch pedis. E was on DH's health plan when she was born. Then we switched her to mine (Kaiser) when DH lost his job.
What IS a deal breaker for me is the doctor not listening to my questions and talking down to me.
My pedi doesn't have kids to my knowledge - and it does not matter to me at all.
Your pediatrician is not your parenting advisor. He/she is your child's doctor. They don't need children of their own to do their job in any way.
1. Did it matter to you if your pedi had kids? IMO this should not matter, you're there for medical advice not parenting advice. Just as it shouldn't matter if your doctor is gay or straight, married or unmarried. I feel that as long as their profesionalism isn't clouded by their personal life things are good.
2. Why/Why not? see above
3. If you switched pedi's later...did it have anything to do with them having children or not? nope.
FTR, N's pedi was my pedi, he's an older guy, has kids that are my age etc. But his having kids had nothing to do with my choice. I've seen him in "crisis" type situations and liked him, I wanted a cautious pedi, one who was not going to pass my concerns off as nothing or just a crazy mother. He has proven to be a great pedi, one who is willing to order tests that others may not. IMO being cautious and maybe overly so is very worthwhile.
But on the other hand he is also really down to earth and when we were dealing with colic recommended a "treatment" that wasn't really mainstream (probiotics). I like that he's up on all things new even though he's an old school guy.
1. not really - although i did prefer that they did, if they didn't they weren't ruled out
2. i want medical advice ... personal ancedotes are optional
3. rosie's on her 2nd pedi b/c she was on my ins. the first 30 days of her life before being added to dh's ... we have separate carriers