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3rd Trimester
S/O describing pain...
Trying to describe the pain of labor is like trying to explain a color to a blind person... how do you do that? If you attempt to describe the color green, you would say it is like the grass, but if the person has never seen the grass, they won't have any idea what you are talking about.
It is also like trying to describe a smell without relating it to another smell.. it just doesn't work.
Everyone has a different experience and different tolerance levels so describing pain as "the worst thing ever", or "not that bad" may be totally different for another person. People get pregnant and give birth all the time, and they do it multiple times, so the end result has to outweigh the pain.
That is all... just my 2 cents.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: S/O describing pain...
YEP!
To me, it was not bad at all. The worst part was laboring at home until they were 4-5 mins apart. I got the epi and felt nothing. Didn't even know she was out until she cried.
Yeah but I don't get what that has to do with anything. Aside from saying "it really freakin hurts", how to you describe pain to someone? It is kind of a personal thing and I can see from the birth stories, everyone has a different experience.
It's like asking someone how long it took them to get pregnant, everyone is different.
I never felt a single painful contraction and I didn't get my epi until I was 5-6 cm. I was also induced with pitocin and had no problems at all.
The OP is right, not everyone is the same and there is no way of explaining what it will be like, because you just never know. Now, I know that I have jinxed myself and that this labor/delivery will more than make up for the last one.
I have to disagree. Labor, unmedicated, hurts...for everyone, no matter their pain tolerance. Sure, it may hurt less for some than for others, but it will always be painful without drugs. And, if they say different...they ARE blowing smoke up your bum. Seven to ten sucks.
I couldn't agree more! I have a pretty high threshold for pain - what someone else might find excrutiating I might find slightly annoying. It doesn't matter how many different people respond to questions about how much pain there is, you'll never be able to guage it until you feel it for yourself.
Look at the poster above you in this thread. That is exactly my point.
You seem really confident, which is great. For some women, this is absolutely terrifying. It helps some to get other perspectives is all. You are right it is all different, but maybe she was looking for encouragement that she will make it through, and that it is all worth it. Something we all know, but could stand to be reminded of once in a while.
It is different coming from an IF background. I think that one becomes more humble, and in tune to the fears and concerns of others.....
Yeah...I was fine up until 5cm too. I'm not saying that pain doesn't differ, but it is painful, and anyone who says it's not is fooling themselves. And, look at my reply...seven to ten is when it really kicked in.
Either way...you'll see. Hope you don't feel an ounce of pain, but don't count on it.
Never said I wouldn't feel pain, or that I had a high tolerance, just that everyone's experience is different so asking someone to describe their particular pain is futile.
And I'm just saying that people that act like it's a cakewalk are fullofshit. No matter your threshold for pain, it hurts if you go naturally. I've never once hear anyone that actually went drug free say it didn't hurt...because it does.
I think this is a comical s/o, though...someone asked so people did their best to answer and help, and you feel the need to basically say the question was pointless. Maybe it's futile to you, but maybe it could help prepare her. Doesn't that go right back to your "everyone is different" argument?
I agree.
One of my friends experienced very little pain during her last childbirth. But then again, she birthed at home with only her husband present (this was planned). She said that it was a perfect, wonderful birth - the only pain that she felt was when the baby was crowning (the 'ring of fire'), but she was so relaxed and at peace with where she was, what her body was doing, that the birth was a piece of cake. She also photographed a birth where the mother made no noise whatsoever and actually giggled as she pushed the babe out because she was so excited to be meeting her little one.
But the experience is different for everyone. You have women that experience severe birth trauma, women that birth their babies on triage tables, women that go in at 2cms, get an epidural and sleep their labor away ... There's no 'right' or 'wrong' way to feel when having a baby. And no two labor & delivery experiences are the same, so it's pointless to try to compare the two.
She has already asked this question more than once and expressed her concerns about her extreme fear of labor several times. She also stressed out endlessly with 8000 posts about which stroller to get during 2nd tri. When she posed this very same question on 0-3 the other day she got lots of answers... so yes, posting it again is obviously futile and no amount of people reassuring her is going to give her that magical answer she is looking for.