How many of you are open with your "troubles" at work? I haven't told anyone cause I am a little ashamed. Everyone knows we are trying to get pregnant, mostly because 5 or 6 people got pregnant/had babies in the past 6months and they always ask what our plans are. Plus I have always said when I get pregnant I am going to need to change my schedule cause right now I work 12 hour days. But now the drugs are making me crazy, and I think people are noticing. I almost cried today when I was a second late opening a reporters mic and the producer yelled at me. I never cry at work. You can't when you work with ten guys. Usually I yell back.
So who here has told co-workers/ bosses their situation?
Re: Does work know you are TTTC?
I havent told my boss- some people know a little bit about us trying for a while-I dont think you have to make excuses for your behavior. chalk it up to stress- dont worry about explaining anything to your coworkers.
My male boss knows b/c I needed some time off.
I have also told my female co-workers that I am close to outside of work as well as a few other co-workers that I know have dealt with IF.
Tara & Dave - TTC since September 2006
PCOS - dx 1999 (amenorrhea) | freakishly long fallopian tubes
Hypoglycemic | thyroid issues | severely anemic
Multiple Clomid cycles of 50, 100, 150 - absolutely no response
Follistim 50/100 | Follistim 75/125 | Follistim 100/150 IUI - all BFNs
Converted IVF - BFP - m/c | FET - BFN | IVF #2 = BFN
IVF #3
My boss knows. I told her because of the time off. I also told her b/c she just recently started having a "friend with benefits" and she'd tell me 500 times a day how she thought she was pregnant and any time I'd tell her that I needed to talk to her (always work related) she'd say "are you pregnant?". It got old.
TI, IUIs, IVF = c/ps and BFNs
After two losses, third time was a charm.
pm me for blog link
we are a close knit family in my office, so I told my boss and a few other people so they would understand why i come in late with bruises on my arms, cry every so often and didnt think i was looking for another job when i take days off around important due dates. they are ok with it and really supportive, my boss actually just called me about an hour ago to see how I was feeling today.
I'm open about it. I don't see a point of me not being open about it. I have to leave work so much for it, that it is kinda a must to be open for me.
Guess it's just a personal decision based on what's going on with you.
You are so lucky! I know my boss would not be that understanding. He gets annoyed when I have to say no to filling in for someone because I have to go get my Remicade infusion. Hello, those things keep me out of the hospital! It's not like I schedule them during my scheduled working hours. If I told him about needing off for Dr's appts he would probably give it to me, but I would get a good brow beating first.
My boss knows, as of about two weeks ago. I never would have told her, but suddenly an opportunity came up that would require a lot of travel. I wanted to do it, but know that I couldn't do IVF and also plan on a lot of traveling. I felt that in the situation telling her would be the right thing to do, and it was. She was very supportive, and found a way for me to take the opportunity, but keep the travel schedule in my hands--without telling anybody else why.
I think when it's time to tell (if ever), it will become obvious to you. Perhaps this situation with the tears is that sign. Or perhaps it was just a bad day. I probably would have been in tears over it, but I'm thin-skinned.
ughhh i am so sorry that your boss can't be understanding. It really sucks and makes things that much more difficult. It's too bad that people just can't go to their boss, tell them they have a medical condition that they need to leave work for, and the boss just say ok no questions asked. It really should be that easy, but unfortunately it is not. Good luck with everything! Hopefully everything will work out!!
At my part time job, they know. It was entertaining trying to fill in my availability when we're starting IVF... I just lost my full-time job, but they didn't know. Of course, since my last day is Friday, I'm telling people since I don't care anymore.
DH told his principal about it, and the principal is being very supportive, which is great. Of course, DH needs a lot less time off than I do!
No.
If you're my FB friend, I just posted there.
Ditto. I'm the same way! I'm very open about it. The more you open up, you will find people who are going through the same things.
My coworkers and female boss knows that we are trying and have been for 3 years. They are pretty supportive and keep telling me it will happen (which sometimes I don't want to hear). The other thing I hear all the time is to "schedule" my future pregnancy so that I don't give birth during tax season (accountant)... yeah right!
I almost cried today too when a client came in that was finally pregnant after trying "forever" and after spending $60,000 on it! Not what I wanted to hear!
TTC #1 since Oct 2006 with severe MFI.
Summer/Fall 2011 - DH on clomid. Helped with morphology and motility, but count still under 1 million.
February 2011 - First RE appointment to discuss options.
March 2011 - We aren't sure what we are going to do right now. DH isn't sure about DS.
~SAIFW~
2 years, 2 surgeries, 2 clomid fails, 2 IUIs, 1 loss, IVF #1 - 10/25/10 = BFP!, DS is now 3.5yrs!
TTC #2 - 6/12 surgery #3, FET #1 & 1.2 = BFN, 12/2012 FET #2 = BFP! DD is 1.5 yrs!
Surprise! 12/16/14 BFP, loss #2 12/31/14
I can't wait for the "im getting a divorce" post in 5 years or so because your husbands were fed up with your disgusting chair asses from playing on the knot all day and getting fired 4-5 times for not doing any work. you guys are all winners!! ~ Laur929
So...only a few people know. I told 3 women at work. 2 previously had issues (1 adopted and the other has 2 through IVF). The 3rd woman I told is my age and is going through the same thing that I am right now - we're even going to the same RE.
I haven't told my boss yet. I basically just said I had some medical things I was working through.
Yes, I told my boss, many of my colleagues and my direct reports.
Please don't feel ashamed of your infertility, you haven't done anything wrong. (((((hugs)))))
Only one person at work knows that DH and I have been having problems conceiving - that's it. No one at work knows any details, and it's was so hard to avoid the conversation because with 3 women who have just started Mat. leave and one more that's about 6 months PG right now, everyone would ask or say "so...you're next!".
I know my boss will be supportive, but because we don't know yet if IVF is even a possibility until DH's urology appt. at the end of this month, I don't want to bring it up until I know I'm going to require a lot of time off for appointments, especially since the clinic is 2hrs from where we live.