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TTC After a Loss
Is it selfish of me to feel this way!!!??
I'm mad, angry, furious!! At the people I work with. I know I've been only posting about them, but everyone else seems to "be human" around me. I've posted before that my boss is 3 1/2 months pregnant. Now on monday one of my coworkers shared with us that she is 4 weeks pregnant. After that I cried for over an hour cause I'm unable to feel vulnerable. I know they are excited and should be celebrating but common, they have brains, and feelings. Seriously someone should at least think to be a little "patient" around me. But now I've had it!!! Not only are they talking and chating all day long about it, in front of me, but they got cake to celebrate, and I wasn't invited. And tomorrow they're all going out to lunch to celebre, again, and with this too I'm not invited, and since I'm staying in I'm supposed to be assisting the door and phones. I'm not mad because I'm not invited to the celebrations, because according to them "this is their way to not hurt my feelings" since I was crying on monday. Seriously I don't care!!! I'm furious cause all they care is about themselves. Can't they go to get some coffee after work? Can't they just be humans for once, and think outside the box, and maybe notice that I'm going through hell!!? Can't they be more respectful of other people's feelings?
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Re: Is it selfish of me to feel this way!!!??
I'm sorry.
(((Hugs))) Your office really does suck.
And your co-worker sharing and celebrating at only 4 weeks? To be that naive.
That's what I was thinking. I truly hope she doesn't find out why it might be smart to wait a little longer.
Awww, honey, I'm so sorry they're being so inconsiderate. I agree w/pp, I don't think people who haven't experienced losses think their comments are inappropriate. My sil even said rather caddy, "Well, we (she and my mil), haven't been through that. We don't like talking about it because you seem so down all the time and we don't know what to say to you."
I think that's the problem w/most people.......instead of just being compassionate and trying to let you cope in your own way, they just want to brush us off because we're not all cheery-cheery, niave. (FYI, whoever posted the "niave" comment, is right on!!)
(((hugs)))
wtf?! Thats crap... how come people dont understand doing this sort of crap only makes us feel worse??
I'm really sorry that really is terrible of them, then to make you sit there and watch the door the whole time they are gone... SCREW That I would take that afternoon off and schedule a lunch with DH just to spite those wenches.
Yeah!! this is so true!!....I understand that they want to celebrate, and I'm ok with it as long as you are not doing it right there in front of me. But what bothers me the most is their lame argument: "we know you are going through hell, so thats why we are not inviting you, stay in and cover for us, but in the meantime, we are still going out to celebrate not really caring if we hurt your feelings or not, because we are happy and too bad for you!!"
You read my mind!! She is actually 3w and a few days....not even 4 weeks yet!! And now she's yelling out the news to every-single-person that comes through our office. If someone I knew lost their baby at 20 weeks (not just cause you are in 2nd tri means u r off the hook) I would at least wait a little to tell people.