Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Don't really want to write here.

I had my 2nd d&c yesterday.  I found out there was no hb at 10 weeks 4 days.  Baby stopped growing at 8.4.  I just wish people would understand, and leave me alone.  I dont want hugs and "sorries" at a birthday party that I dont even want to be at.  Just leave me alone.  My friend at work even asked me if I was ok and if I didnt have a doc appointment could I please work for M**** because she didnt want to work with her.  HUH?  No.  I'm having a miscarriage.  I want to lock myself in the house and watch tv with my son.  And the only person I want around (besides my son) is my husband...but he's with his f*&#*^% friends.  I feel so alone.  How strange is it that I b*&ch and moan that I want people to leave me alone...yet I feel so alone. 

I've even stopped bleeding already.  So the only thing I have to remind myself of this baby is some motrin 600, tylenol 3, and some antibiotic.  Oh...and an ultrasound picture I wont allow myself to look at.  

Re: Don't really want to write here.

  • I am so very sorry for your loss...

    I also had a D & C yesterday and I don't want to be around anyone except my husband and cat! I've had friends text me knowing what just happened just to send a forward... I mean REALLY!!! Then my DH's friend ( oh how I don't like him to begin with), also knowing what had happened, calls us twice today "Hey you want to go on a boat w/ some friends?" WHAT, are you kidding me I just had surgery!!! Then he calls again "Hey you coming to the bonfire??" OMG does he not get a clue!!! Then he is like, "you guys never do anything fun!" We just lost our baby!!! Ahhhh people can be so cruel, get a heart!

    Ahhh sorry... I needed to get that off my chest too... So hun I know how you feel... Al  I have done is sat in front of the couch and rented movies, played ps2, got on here and blogged... and out of know where just burst into tears...

    It's so crazy how attached you become to someone you never have even met... (sigh) Even though right now it is incredibly hard to deal with, it is the best feeling in the world to love someone that much!

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  • Im right there with you...I sent my DH and 4 year old away for the weekend because I needed to be alone and didnt want her to see me being a mess..but now I feel so alone and want them here...

    Im still bleeding and wish it would just stop already....everytime is see the blood it reminds me of what I just lost. I almost wish I had a D&C instead of this happening naturally because the tissue I just passed about 4 hours ago was no clots....it was the sac and the tiny white boney tissue of my baby (sorry tmi)

    Im so sick of people calling or texting to say how sorry they are and if im ok...

    I know I would rather be alone then feel quilty about not wanting to do anything with my daughter except lay in bed and cry but it sucks feeling alone too...

    I think the only people I would like to say something to me besides DH are people who have gone through this or are currently going through this...so after saying that I am very sorry you are going through what I am going through...I wouldnt wish this upon my worst enemy... 

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  • Yeah.  I got invited to a keg party.  I was flabbergasted.  First of all..when was the last (or first) time I was at a keg party?  Second..I have a 5 year old.  And third..I JUST HAD A MISCARRIAGE!!  These people just dont get it. 

    Let me know if you ever wanna chat, I could use it too.  

  • Yeah my sister calls me today complaining about her cell phone and how she has to wait for an upgrade blah blah blah...I wasnt upset with her because she had no idea I lost the baby yet..I wasnt ready to say it outloud to everyone yet...turns out she just talked to my mom and my mom told her!! I was actually thankful my mom told her so I didnt have to but what the F! she knew and still called to complain about her damn phone and how she couldnt afford a new one..basically implying I should buy her one! Even family doesnt get it sometime...

     

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  • imagejojokittie:

    Yeah.  I got invited to a keg party.  I was flabbergasted.  First of all..when was the last (or first) time I was at a keg party?  Second..I have a 5 year old.  And third..I JUST HAD A MISCARRIAGE!!  These people just dont get it. 

    Let me know if you ever wanna chat, I could use it too.  

    WOW really, some people just need to grow a heart... That is horrible. I'm so sorry...  (((((HUGS)))))
  • I'm very sorry for your two losses.  After my loss DH and I stayed away from everyone for at least a week, then started to let people back in.  I didn't even talk to anyone for a while and when I did at first I had to have my DH with me.  Can you take this week off and just lock yourself in your house and grieve?  ((((((((big hugs))))))))))))
  • I had my D&C yesterday and I find that being with family is helping to keep my mind off of it.  My DH doesn't really know what to say and I know he is sad too.  My parents and sister have been really supportive but I am just so sad.  My close friends know and most sent me texts, emails and a few called (even though I said I didn't want to talk to anyone).  Everyone gives the same advice - "well at least you know you can get pregnant"...."it will happen again"...."you are meant to have the family you will have".  I don't want to hear any of it now - I am just not ready.

     

     

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  • I am so sorry for your loss. Its the hardest thing I ever had to go through. I had a missed miscarriage for my second. I was almost 12 weeks, they said baby died at 6 weeks. Its an awful feeling thinking you never knew anything was wrong.

    People will say stupid things, they just dont have a clue. they dont know what to say.  I get mad when people tell me "oh I know someone who had 5 miscarriages and they have kids". gee thanks...  and if one person tells me how common it is I am going to strangle them!

    you will go through all stages of grief. I am so happy you found this board. It will help you and its a great place for support. these ladies are great. Also when you are ready the TTC after a loss is a fantastic board.

    in time it does get easier.  I promise you. the pain will lessen but you will never forget. I lost my second 13 months ago. I look at the ultrasound picture sometimes and still cry. I cant throw it away. Its the only picture I ever got from all three pregnancies. thats my sweet baby.

    Also you have a good advantage. you have that sweet son of yours that will keep you grounded and happy. I am sure he makes you laugh. he will be your strengh. also your husband will be your rock. dont be afraid to lean on him.

    good luck to you. and again I am so sorry.

    ps, read my blog esp. my earlier posts. it might be helpful to you.

    big hugs.

    Suzanne & Pasquale 9/9/07
    Our Journey in Blog.
    My Blog
    Our Sweet boy Luca Salvatore 10/6/10 & Our precious daughter, Arianna Regina 4/9/13
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I know what you mean about wanting to be alone, but then feeling SO alone once you are. There were times I made FI leave the house and hang out with friends, but the second he stepped out the door I wanted him back. But we are always here for you.
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