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Baby Showers
Hosting own shower
I'm hosting my own shower, but I think it would be too big to have just one. I have an enormous family (65 females on my side alone) and DH's side isn't exactly small. And that's just family -- I'd love to invite my friends, but I'm young (23) and a lot of them wouldn't be comfortable hanging out with my Grams and the rest of my female family.
Would it be a faux pas to host a seperate shower for my friends and for DH's side if I'm the one who is doing the hosting?
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Re: Hosting own shower
Just in case this isnt MUD.
DO NOT HOST YOUR OWN SHOWER. This is a big no-no! You can NOT host a party for yourself that involves gifts for yourself. Someone else must host the shower for you. Other than helping to pick the date, you should stay mostly out of it.
Also, when i say someone else must host the shower for you, they have to OFFER to host it, you cant ask someone to host your shower.
?
Agreed.?
Go for it! I would coordinate with your Mom & MIL though-- they can be great buffers and coordinators with a big family to make sure you don't ruffle feathers.
I disagree with the sentiment that you can't host your own shower... By the comments above, I would think it would be improper to organize a party/get-together when it's my birthday-- and that's just silly. (So is the idea that you can't host your own shower.)
If this is not MUD, then:
#1 Don't throw yourself a shower. Just send out cards and beg for gifts. Same idea, right?
#2. Don't put links to your registry in your bio. That's just plain dumb. And also begging for gifts.
Agreed! I would not even consider attending a shower that someone has thrown for themself. Begging for gifts is not ok.
While I do think it's sad that you have lots of friends and family,and noone has offered to host your shower,I do think it's ok to host your own.It';s just like throwing your own birthday part and people do it all the time.You know what you want better than anyone so go a head and throw your own shower. Another Idea would be to get about five of your closet family members and friends together and say Im thinking about having my shower on this date what do you think? Then you can aske for their input about menus and and so on.Then you can ask Mary would she like to do the cake.and sue and jane if the would like to help with the food and nan if she wants to do thr invitations and rsvp's
The amount of money it would cost you to host your own shower, with that many people, may not be worth it ~
If it's about meeting the baby, do it afterwards.
To those that say it is OK to host your own shower...are you for real? Have you never read anything on proper etiquette? I mean...seriously?
You cannot host your own shower. Quite frankly, IF you have sooooo many relatives (65 women) and not ONE has offered to host a shower for you do you really think they would come to a shower you hosted yourself? I think not.
Also, the one pp had a good point. Use the $$ that you would spend on a shower of that magnitude and buy the stuff you need for the baby.
To the pp that said a shower is the same as hosting your own birthday party or wedding reception. They are NOTHING alike. The sole purpose of a shower (baby or bridal) is to get gifts. Gifts are NOT required for a wedding/reception or a birthday party (although most people think they are).
Personally, I think this post is MUD...and if not then a very ignorant person wrote it.
DO NOT HOST YOUR OWN SHOWER. This is a big no-no! You can NOT host a party for yourself that involves gifts for yourself. Someone else must host the shower for you. Other than helping to pick the date, you should stay mostly out of it.
Well if noone else steps up for the job, I think it would be a little crappy to say thats he doesn't deserve a shower. I'm going to a shower next month thats being hosted by the mom and dad and I do see one things wrong with it. I'm thrilled that I was invited and get to share in thier special day!
The uptight ones will tell you you're wrong for wanting to throw your own shower however that's not the tone I'm getting from it. I can see that you want a shower but no one has stepped up to offer. If I were you, I would have your hubby talk to his side of the family and possibly hint to his mother about throwing you one, if it's a no go then I wouldn't stress it.
In terms of your side of the family and friends, I would prolly talk to your mom about it and see if they have plans they haven't informed you about yet. But it is "bad etiquette" to throw your own shower but we're no longer in the dark ages, things aren't as traditional as they once were. We're seeing a lot more co-ed showers etc. So don't feel bad about what the other posters had to say, you know how the old saying goes right...
"Opinions are like assholes, everyone's got one." lol
Showers don't need to be about presents. This goes for bridal showers and baby showers- let's celebrate the person, and in this case motherhood. Some showers do seem it's all about the materialistic side, but you don't have to have one of those. If you're smart and can do some strategic planning to include meaning and making it reflect you, this could be a beautiful thing, no matter who does or doesn't host for you, if anyone. Do it yourself, and anyone who has an issue with it doesn't need to come. This isn't about begging for gifts.
I do agree with an earlier post to talk to the mother and MIL or other awesome women in your life to see if they can help. You're not asking for a shower, you're asking for help, assistance, ideas, etc. Any of these women should be delighted to help you in something like a shower. Good luck!!!!!
Agreed!
Just wanted to chime in and finish this...
"and they all stink!"