Okay, nevermind - DH already leaking gender news

NeverKnew · August 2009

So, after our NT scan today (where doc had made a guess at the gender), DH and I both parted for work. We made the critical error of not dicussing what we would do with our 'news'.

DH went to work and told his brother right away. I blogged that we weren't going to tell until our 20 week u/s. Doh.

DH now emails me pointing out that he'd already told. I said my parents won't get the 'it's a guess' thing and would start buying us gender-specific stuff regardless. I don't want to tell them. I'd rather just wait and make a big announcement (to everybody) later. He wants to go ahead and tell his folks since his brother already knows.

We've got an interesting discussion ahead tonight. I'm completely torn. Any viewpoints from the audience? What would you do in my situation? How would you cut off the flow of information? Or would you?

bubbles1233 · August 2009

Unfortunately, I don't think you can stop the flow of information. I think the best thing at this point would be to tell people yourself so that you can explain that it is a guess and not for sure. If you don't say anything, the gender will probably still get around, but people may not know that it not 100% sure.

Mrs.BoomBoom · August 2009

Can you tell his parents without telling yours? Our families never communicate with each other, so we could tell one and not the other.

krystal0707 · August 2009

I agree with PP that it may be hard to stop the spread, but I would just be prepared to tell others that it is still really early and you would rather wait for confirmation when you are further along. I think people will realize how early it is to find out the sex, but some will be oblivious. I would just laugh it off if someone is really adamant about getting you a gift, maybe say, "man I hope LO doesn't change their mind now ;-)"

Summer20 · August 2009

We have our NT scan on Thursday and even if they guess (which I don't think they will) we will keep it a secret until we know for sure. For the same reasons as you - people won't understand the "guess" part.

In your case, can he just tell his brother not to say anything? Work people probably don't overlap with your families and other friends so there's probably not a big risk there. GL

kelcat · August 2009

I agree, it's hard to stop word from spreading. When you do tell the news to your parents (or others for that matter) do you think you could say something like, the dr. thinks that we are having a ____ (stressing the think) but we will have another u/s at 20 wks to confirm.

Just an idea.

NeverKnew · August 2009

Summer20:

We have our NT scan on Thursday and even if they guess (which I don't think they will) we will keep it a secret until we know for sure. For the same reasons as you - people won't understand the "guess" part.

In your case, can he just tell his brother not to say anything? Work people probably don't overlap with your families and other friends so there's probably not a big risk there. GL

This was my plan too, and as for asking his brother to not say anything, I'm proposing this tonight.

I've - at the very least - asked him to please tell his brother to not tell until he and I have had a chance to discuss and come to a mutual conclusion. I don't think that's too much to ask.

Stick out tongue

gingerfamily · August 2009

Even if the doctor made an educated guess it is way too early to know for sure if he is correct.

I wouldn't say anything and ask his brother to keep the info a secret.

NeverKnew · August 2009

mrsh0606:

Even if the doctor made an educated guess it is way too early to know for sure if he is correct.

I wouldn't say anything and ask his brother to keep the info a secret.

"Well, the doctor guessed it was a boy and he says he's been about 80% correct in the past, so we'll have to see how good he is at our 20 week u/s in 7 weeks," just doesn't have the same ring to it as, "It's a boy!" does it?

mlf625 · August 2009

NeverKnew:
"Well, the doctor guessed it was a boy and he says he's been about 80% correct in the past, so we'll have to see how good he is at our 20 week u/s in 7 weeks," just doesn't have the same ring to it as, "It's a boy!" does it?

That does suck. ?We found out at our NT scan with DS that he was "very likely" a boy. ?While that was really exciting, it was annoying to be like "we're PROBABLY having a boy!" ?We have our NT tomorrow and I'm going to tell the tech we don't want to know. ?I'd just rather find out from my doctor at 16 weeks.

Anyway, now that your DH blabbed I think it's going to be tough to keep it quiet. ?I'd probably just tell. ?I really doubt your doc is wrong, I know most aren't going to guess unless they're pretty sure.

Congrats on your maybe-boy!?

NeverKnew · August 2009

mlf625:
NeverKnew:

"Well, the doctor guessed it was a boy and he says he's been about 80% correct in the past, so we'll have to see how good he is at our 20 week u/s in 7 weeks," just doesn't have the same ring to it as, "It's a boy!" does it?

That does suck. We found out at our NT scan with DS that he was "very likely" a boy. While that was really exciting, it was annoying to be like "we're PROBABLY having a boy!" We have our NT tomorrow and I'm going to tell the tech we don't want to know. I'd just rather find out from my doctor at 16 weeks.

Anyway, now that your DH blabbed I think it's going to be tough to keep it quiet. I'd probably just tell. I really doubt your doc is wrong, I know most aren't going to guess unless they're pretty sure.

Congrats on your maybe-boy!

Hehehe, thanks! Wink

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