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Stay at Home Moms
What does your DH do for a living?
DH and I have known since before we were married that we would want a family where I could be a sahm. We had planned to start TTC mid 2010. We've been saving a ton, but when we break down our finances, his salary would need to almost double for it to be possible for me to sah! We've played around with the numbers, deleting phones, cable, etc, but still can not get our expenses paid soley off of his salary.
So I'm curious, what do your DHs do for a living? Did they have to change jobs for you to sah?
Thanks!
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Re: What does your DH do for a living?
He's a computer programmer/database specialist. He makes very good money, but not enough to warrant me being home. I was voluntarily laid off from my job of 11 years. I had taken a 20% cut in the last year due to the economy. DH and I crunched the numbers and since my salary had been cut so much, if I were able to collect unemployment and we didn't have to pay the $1100/month (for 4 days/week!) in childcare that we were, it was pretty much a wash, or we may make out a little bit ahead.
So, that's how I'm able to stay home. This is my second week. Unfortunately, I'll have to go back in April/May as unemployment doesn't last forever.
He's a maintenance sup/computer guy for the state. He's also in the air national guard, and goes to school pt with the GI bill. When I got pregnant (and when I started SAH actually) he made much less than he does now - about 1500/mo take home at that time. He got a promotion, started taking classes and got a decent raise since then. So we are more comfortable now, but we were making it before.
In some cases (NOT all) it can really depend on where you live, where you are willing to live, and how much you are willing to give up. We don't own a nice house (we rent a small one) and we do splurge on things like cable, but we really wanted to make the sah thing work. We are waiting on the nice house and all that jazz.
He is an underwriter.
I work part time too - although I didn't work at all from pregnancy month 8 to 4 months post partum - and I only work 8-10 hours a week....and it can be inconsistent with client cancellations, etc. I am a speech therapist.
Anyway, we own a house. But we only have one car payment, we are frugal, etc. DH is a money saving machine, so he built up an account that we were able to dip into during my time off work.
I go to work in the evenings and on the weekends. Anything you could do a few hours a week just to help out?
Mes Petit Choux
I can't go back to yesterday - because I was a different person then. ~ Alice
Do you live in a high COL area? If so, consider relocating to someplace where you can buy a less expensive home. Typically, the mortgage is a family's largest expense, so it's important not to buy more house than you can afford.
DH is the director of an accounting division for a large national grocer.
ETA: Like some have mentioned, we're also older than the average nest couple. I'm in my mid-thirties and DH is in his early forties. We've had longer to save, work, invest, etc.
No, he didn't have to change jobs, but he's considering changing companies to be closer to home. He travels a lot which is one of our current sacrifices for me to stay home. We also live in a smaller home that we would be if I were working FT too. I do work PT from home though.
But honestly, the wives of most linemen I know are SAHM/WAHM. It's just nearly impossible to run a family, keep up with the house, take care of all your husband's business, etc. while he's on the road if you're working outside the home. I did it for the first 5 or 6 months DH and I were married and it sucked. I was going to school full time and working part time and I couldn't seem to get everything done.
My DH is a mechanical engineer. He works at the the job he's had since he was one year out of college.
The biggest contributing factor to me being able to SAH is that both DH and I are in our mid-30s. He's had time in his job to work up to a pretty decent salary. We had both accumulated significant savings while we were working so we have a financial cushion in place already.
He's a director at a Pharma company. He makes a really great salary, allowing me to SAH. We live in a high COL area as well. He didn't have to change his job when I decided to SAH with DD#1, but he has since been promoted at his company (last year), making it much easier for us. I gave up a really good salary as well, to SAH.
GL!
Field Engineer
He leads a team at a financial company. They don't really have titles there...maybe project manager? It's a Wall Street company, but he works for an office here in OK, which is very low COL. There are lots of SAHMs in my town, and most of the guys at his office have wives that SAH with the kids. They work a lot of hours, so it would be hard to have two people working.
As another poster said, we're in our 30s, so that helped. He's pretty established. Plus, COL is a huge factor here.
(m/c 1.17.07, m/c 5.15.07)
DS - 03.15.08
DD2 - 12.03.09
DD3 - 3.28.11
DH is a Senior Graphics Administrator/Engineer so he makes good money. We live in a low COL though. (He's been there for about 9 years now.)
We don't have any debt except our mortgage so that helps too. Having zero payments/car payments and cc's is awesome.
Before that, we paid off $34K debt in 14 months by sticking to a major budget. We still use the budget today and sock all of that money away in savings/retirement. We only have a 4 mo. emergency fund so we are slowly working up to 6 months.
DH is a computer programmer and specializes in specific programs that not many people work in. He makes enough for me to stay at home because we have very little debt. We have the usual cable, cell phone, electric, etc. But other than that we pay on mortgage and school loans. No credit card debt and very limited vacations, clothing allowance, eating out, etc.
I haven't read the other responses, but I'm sure many have mentioned trying to live off of one salary for a while or paying off some of the unnecessary debt. Also, have you thought of working at night or weekends while your DH is home with your LO? Just some things to think about.
Our mortgage really is our biggest expense, and we hadn't considered moving or me working PT.
Thanks for the responses gals! Hopefully I'll join this board in 2011!
DH works at our local Cal State University as an IT Consultant. He's been there 11 years, so his job should be fairly stable but with California's budget crisis, he recently got furloughed two days a month, eliminating 10% of his pay, for the next 12 months.
Yuck!
Hi and welcome to the board (you CAN participate before you have your child!)!
My DH has been a Lighting & Effects Artist in the animated film industry for nearly a decade and was before we even met. He makes 3x what I do (before SAH full-time I was a Public Auditor/CPA) so, my not working had no major impact on our finances. Unfortunately, we live in San Francisco, CA and it feels like he makes a whole lot less than when we livedin Texas, haha
If DH had not been able to support us all, I would not have been able to SAH and never would've even considered it so, I really do feel very fortunate that things just worked out this way.
Good luck finding some things that work for you!
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
DD#1~8/17/96------DS~10/24/05
He's a critical care nurse and no he didn't have to change jobs. Luckily, he only has to work 3 nights a week! It pays good enough for me to be a sahm, pay our mortgage and our bills. If money gets tight he can pick up extra shifts!
Nurse anesthetist. He's also in the army reserves. We were lucky--he just picks up a few extra shifts a month to cover what I would've made working.
Good luck! Hope to see you on the board soon!
My DH is a barber, and i know it may be way hard to believe but we're doing very well, we are both in our 20's and have no debt at all, which helps a lot. We own our home and have enough money leftover after our bills to put away in our savings. But bad thing is that i don't get to see him all day till like 8pm or 10pm and he leaves for work at 8am, it's hard and he doesn't have to work all those hours but he wants to please his costumers which i understand i guess. We always argue about him working so much without having to so hopefully he'll cut back on his hours since he is his own boss and can do as he pleases. What good does money do when you don't have time to be with the one you love(sigh)