Circumcision Decision ~ Help

The Lungos · August 2009

For all you moms of boys and/or moms-to-be of boys ? what are you going to do about the circumcision question. DH and I have just started to discuss it and I have done a little research on line, but I am really torn about this. Do we or don?t we? There is a lot out there that says how terrible and horrible it is for the baby and then there is the other side that says while in most cases not medically necessary, it can prevent some health issues and is more hygienic. And it has been done for a very long time (not saying that makes it right) so I told DH the final decision was up to him.

I still have a lot or research to do and doctor questions to ask...

What are you going to do?

CTri17 · August 2009

this is one decision we are still working through. Check out parenting.com's forums. They have something called the case against circumcision that brings up many points.

We are still undecided but I am leaning one way I think.

chrystaleigh · August 2009

We are going to circumcise LO. It's not medically necessry but it is more hygenic.

cinderellabella · August 2009

We don't know what we're having yet, but we've already decided that we're are going to do it if it's a boy.

krissyh21 · August 2009

I suspect you are going to get the same type of mixed responses as you read online here (this is how circumcision posts go). I left it 100% up to my husband, because he has a penis and I don't. He is circumcised and without hesitation he said he would be more comfortable if our boy was as well. No heavy research was needed for me to be comfortable with that decision.

Max'smom · August 2009

Since I don't have a penis, I left the decision completely up to DH. I don't have strong feelings either way. DH choose to have DS done, mainly I think because he is, but honestly I didn't question his decision at all.

Denae'sTTC · August 2009

This was a no brainer for us.. I dont want my kid to think he is different from his friends..Or later on be mad casue he has a turtle head and none of his friends do..Plus things can get stuck in the foreskin and thats gross...

ellemoney:) · August 2009

We aren't having a boy.. but if we were we had already discussed it. ?I told DH it was completely up to him, but I don't think we would have. Dh isn't.. and I just feel like it's something?unnecessary. ?I read in Parents that sometimes it's not even numbed when they do it. ?I wouldn't be able to stand that ? ?(I think it depends on what area you're from, etc).?

?

Layla116 · August 2009

I don't think it's that "horrible" for the baby. If that's so horrible, childbirth would be HORRENDOUS for the baby...JMO.

He will be too young to remember anything bad.

We're going to do it.

RickeyandDani · August 2009

I rather my child go through temporary pain then deal with a lot of possible problems as they grow older.

B!tchBeckman · August 2009

-You're opening a can of worms and will get alot of answers!- from both sides.-

With Alek we circumsized him, and we will again with Draven. For us the benefits outweighed not doing it. Having it done right away the baby wont remember it, they give anesthesia to make it painless for the infant (Well less painless than if the child were older and remember it)

We thought about the cleaning process. While either way you have to clean the area, you will have to do more in depth cleaning with an un circumcized penis. You'll have to fold back the forskin and make sure theres no poop etc under it that can cause infections.

Infections are more succeptable to an uncircumsized penis because you may think that you are getting it clean enough but sometimes it's not well enough and infections -if untreated for too long can cause long term issues.

Also I don't know who in their right mind (meaning grown male) would opt to go in for a surgery later on in life...

This is just my opinion.

MissyC979 · August 2009

We are doing it. Not circumcising was never really a discussion point for us. We both feel pretty strongly about it.

rissainthesky* · August 2009

we are having a girl, but if we were having a boy, we would circumcise. Its a personal decision. Both have pros and cons, but neither way is "wrong." I've asked DH numerous times about it (he is circumcised) and he says it isn;t even an issue for him, he would want his son circumcised. also, I would want it done for religious reasons.

Lurksgirl · August 2009

We don't know what we're having yet, but our doctor said this to us: aside from religious requirment if the baby's father is circumsized, then you should do the baby as well so that if the LO happens to see daddy naked he won't wonder why his is different from his fathers. As for us ... should we have a boy, we're not planning on it.

justrachet · August 2009

We just talked about this last night. DH asked for my opinions, but honestly, he knows more about these things than I do, since he was circumcised when he was 10 and remembers all of it. Because of his feelings on the matter, supposing we have a son, we will be having him circumcised as a baby.

emmyloustu · August 2009

If this LO is a boy, we will circumcise. Dh was not circumcised at birth (his family is from Ireland) and then it was decided later -around age 10- that he would be for various medical reasons. He remembers the pain and does not want his son to have any memory of the event so it will be done at birth.

Kathy02912 · August 2009

I'm not convinced by the hygiene argument. If you don't prematurely detach the foreskin by pulling it back, it should stay fine. There are slight medical advantages both ways, but none that are very compelling for me. And, although I don't like to think of my future kids' sex lives, apparently it feels better to be intact.

I'm more comfortable with the idea of circumcision, because as an American born in the 70s, I've only ever seen circumcised ones. (When a French college friend learned that, he REALLY wanted to show me his!) However, I knew that wanting what I was used to was a selfish reason.

The big thing that decided it for me was the experience of a friend. They didn't circumcise their son. Later, he was diagnosed with a problem where the urethra didn't exit at the end of the penis, but sorta off to the side. It's not a dangerous problem, but would mean that he would only ever be able to pee sitting down. The surgery to correct it used his foreskin. Viola! Perfect penis! If they'd circumcised at birth for no reason, they wouldn't have had that option later. Chances are slim that a son of ours would need surgery like that, but it just spoke to me to leave things alone, so that you have options later.

Plus, I'm not big on irreversible changes. I can't even commit to a tattoo!

CTri17 · August 2009

B!tchBeckman:
We thought about the cleaning process. While either way you have to clean the area, you will have to do more in depth cleaning with an un circumcized penis. You'll have to fold back the forskin and make sure theres no poop etc under it that can cause infections.

Infections are more succeptable to an uncircumsized penis because you may think that you are getting it clean enough but sometimes it's not well enough and infections -if untreated for too long can cause long term issues.

Early on (from birth to up to 3 years) there will not be a cleaning process of underneath the foreskin because it is attached and should not under any circumstances be retracted. It will retract itself as the child grows older.

Then yes, it will have to be part of routine cleaning.

Just wanted to say that...this is just my opinion

Lauren5841 · August 2009

When I worked in daycare centers I worked with a very diverse population with little boys who were circumsized and uncircumsized. The boys who were uncircumsized had a much harder time with ensuring they wiped themselves correctly (when they were getting potty trained and after) and had to deal with more frequent rashes/irritation in that area. For those reasons...I'd say make him look like his Daddy (i assume Daddy is circumsized) so it'll be easier in the long run:) Good luck with your decision!?

blessedinthewest · August 2009

I let SO make the decesion and he wants to circumcise. He says that it is just easier for young boys and even adults to keep it clean. He based his decesion solely on that.

Melaina25 · August 2009

"It's more hygenic" is not a valid reason; just saying.

It's a personal choice. It's not standard here and if we have a boy I'd have the baby match the Dad.

Kathy02912 · August 2009

Lurksgirl:
We don't know what we're having yet, but our doctor said this to us: aside from religious requirment if the baby's father is circumsized, then you should do the baby as well so that if the LO happens to see daddy naked he won't wonder why his is different from his fathers. As for us ... should we have a boy, we're not planning on it.

I don't get that argument. There will be a lot of differences between a son's package and his daddy's. Starting with public hair! I think kids can handle body differences really easily, if they're explained matter-of-factly.

Oh, and with our daughter, before we knew she was a girl, I thought, "Let DH decide, he's the one with a penis." Now, my thinking is: SCREW THAT! I'm the one who's put in hours doing research and talked to all of my mommy friends! What does he know?

SpartanGirl · August 2009

We chose not to circ. It is not medically necessary and many insurance companies are choosing not to cover it.

Yes, it is an area that is more prone to infection, but as our pedi said, so are our ears and we don't go lopping those off do we?

FWIW, DS has never had an issue or infection.

ETA: Just to add more to the non-circ side - The "hygenic" argument never did it for me. Our pedi told us to clean DS's penis like we clean his elbow. No pulling back the foreskin or extra steps. As he gets older he will be responsible for cleaning it the same way he will be responsible for cleaning out his ears or any other part of his body.

And for matching - well, everyone is different. Isn't this just one more way to teach your child that people look different, but that's okay? Personally, I hope my kid isn't running around comparing his penis with everyone he sees! lol!

mrs_sherod · August 2009

Def circumcising. TMI, but my dad has told me he is not circumcized and has had issues in the past.

easjer05 · August 2009

We are likely to circumcise if the LO is a boy. But it depends on a few factors. Because we are birthing from home, we have to find a pediatrician who will do it and insurance may or may not cover it. We don't believe so strongly in circumcision that we would pay oop for the procedure, but if it will be covered, our preference is to have it done.

twh2006 · August 2009

My son isn't, and this one won't be either. My husband is, but after much research he agrees with me, it's there for a reason and not necessary to chop it off.

PP who stated it's done under anesthesia....I'm a nurse, and I'm telling you it's not at my hospital, sure they tell you it won't hurt etc...and I've even heard a doc say they use a local, but you don't sign consent for anesthesia and you aren't back there when it's done...It's not done where I work, or other places I've worked at. FWIW.

Happy10th! · August 2009

For several reasons, we will not circumcise. If LO would like to alter his body, that should be his choice.

You will find lots of information leaning one way or the other; here are some links:

https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071008190723AA9cSIT

palomaLuna · August 2009

If we have a boy, definitely not. DH wasn't, and he's never had any problems. Neither have his brothers. If it's a matter of hygiene and infection risk, I think educating boys on proper care is the most important factor.

I think nature created foreskins for a reason. And I wouldn't be one to mess with nature.

fIowerchild · August 2009

My son is circ'd. We did it for the future generation of females.

Twin_Stones_in_the_Oven · August 2009

DS is and if this baby is a boy he will be as well.

Twin_Stones_in_the_Oven · August 2009

DS

is

Slockhart · August 2009

My SO is circ'd and he is Jewish so I guess in Jewish traditions it is what you do when a boy is born. He wants his sons' to "look" like his to avoid and questions of why LO looks "different" as he gets older.

palomaLuna · August 2009

fIowerchild:
My son is circ'd. We did it for the future generation of females.

Meaning?

Alyssajoy87 · August 2009

DH and I covered this before we even knew we were having a son. We decided that because it can prevent some health issues, we will have our son circumcised. Plus, there are things they can do now so that it's not so hard on the baby, which was one big factor in our decision. I understand that a lot of people don't agree with that decision and that's just fine- they can do things differently with their children, but this is what we felt was right for our family.

Anna&Matt · August 2009

We are on team green but if it's a boy we will definitely circumcise. DH was not and he wound up getting a horrible infection as a result and had to be circumcised when he was about 5 years old. I do not want to put our child through that so we'll circumcise at birth.

clbaby · August 2009

We are going to get our son circumsized...I just think it will be better in the long run for his health and his personal/emotional well being.

ale84 · August 2009

My ex boyfriend wasn't and he will openly tell you that he wishes he would have been.

nolabride0605 · August 2009

Snip, snip... sorry baby boy!

DH and I talked about it before we found out we were having a boy. At the u/s when the tech said it was a boy, DH looked at me and said, "circumcise." I didn't even really consider not doing it...

kuzzu25 · August 2009

it seems like generally fathers lean toward what they are...circumcised or not. I did it with DS, and do not regret that decision at ALL. I've seen arguments both ways, and ultimately it's whatever side has the more compelling argument to you and DH.

Married2MrWright · August 2009

If we have a son we will not circumcise, even though DH is. He feels very strongly about this and I support this decision. If, later in life, our son feels like he wants to be circumcised, it will be his decision, not one that was made for him. FWIW, I am not sold on the whole "it's more hygienic" issue...I gather than once the little guy learns how to take care of his business, hygiene shouldn't be a big issue or factor.

greycoral · August 2009

DH is, our son won't be. The rate of circumcision in the US is dropping, where it used to be around 85%, it is now closer to 50%, and very low in states whose state run health care do not cover the procedure (in CA, I know the rate is about 35% who ARE circumcised). I live in Oregon, and my state health plan does not cover it, they deem it a cosmetic procedure, and it would be $500 to do it.

I just don't think it's a necessary procedure, but it's a very personal decision. To do it because "he has to look like daddy" isn't enough of a reason for me nor DH.

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