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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
FI basically told me I'm a bad lay.
Everything short of actually coming right out with it.
I am truly sorry that I housed a baby for 9 months and then needed a little time to recover and am now getting comfortable with my new life role and managing a newborn.. guess I was just being selfish and lazy not to make sex #1 priority. 
FFS - he said "I was too limited" or some shyt like that - I asked if it was bc anal was not on the menu? He doesnt understand that just bc I tried it once, doesnt mean I liked it or ever want to do it again.
Realistically ladies, what do I do? Please, try to withhold the "give him lube and a mag" comments bc I want to try to spice it up with him! What have you done to bring a little "fun" into the bedroom? TIA.
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Re: FI basically told me I'm a bad lay.
Figure out what he likes and turns him on that is within the realm of what you're comfortable doing, and then find time for a "fantasy night". This doesn't have to be your regular routine, but a little spice thrown in every now and then is fun. But part of that discussion also needs to be him having realistic expectations of you and what's going on in your life - meaning he may have to help get things done in the evening around the house so that YOU have time/energy to feel "spicy".
I think this is the major issue- He said that "he always has to ask for things" and I said "Well, it ruins my mood or the mood when you ask"
Then I realized, I never initiate - hardly ever - maybe once since L was born.. Maybe I'll just try doing that and surprising him with things more often.. I think thats all he really wants!
He actually made the comment that if this is what I'm like now at 23 then how am I going to be in 5 years? I hate that this is a major concern and I know it is making him more nervous about marriage. Stupid guys.
I remember a poster saying she wore a horse tail to turn on her man...lol
You could wear some kinky lingerie under sweats & suprise him w/a strip tease.
Or make him a nudy photo album. He probably wants more blow jobs too.
What man doesn't!!! LOL.
He does! LOL Right after L was born I def tried to just about everyday (I KNOW, he should've been thrilled) but then when L was around 6 weeks I started having mouth problems..real bad toothache/jaw pain causing me to be on vicodin and then I couldnt do the bj's -- poor guy was SOL!
LOL!!
OP - I think you're on the right track with initiating sometimes and letting him know that you do enjoy being with him so he doesn't always feel like he is the one trying to turn the mood to sexy. However, I also think that your FI needs to understand what a huge stress your body went through and that sex isn't necessarily the top of your priority list...
Role-play?
Never met a guy who wasn't turned on by a sexy school girl or nurse
Dirty talk. If you aren't comfortable to begin with, just start by telling him when something feels really good and go from there. You can also send him naughty texts/emails during the day (assuming there is no risk of them being intercepted) to let him know that you are thinking about him and what you might do to him when he gets home.