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Sort of CW...I'm an awful wife

danandkellydanandkelly
in Northern California Babies

So dh is having surgery next Tuesday on his knee.  He went to his pre-op today and afterwards we had lunch.

He proceeds to tell me at lunch about how he won't be able to shower for 8 days, he can't put any weight on it for between 3 days nad 6 weeks, and he'll need help getting into a standing position from any seated position (read getting off the toilet) etc etc

And all the while I'm thinking..."Gross, I have to sleep in the same bed with someone who can't shower", and  "are you f-ing kidding me...I'm going to have to help you off the toilet"  and all these things about how awful this is going to be for me.  Oh and how I'll be completely on my own for all things household and Natalie for weeks....or more considering I'm quite sure that he'll milk the sh!t out of this.

How self centered....

Man I'm really a horriable wife.

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Re: Sort of CW...I'm an awful wife

  • edsbabyedsbaby
    I would be thinking the same thing as you.  Now for what it's worth.  I had knee surgery and had my meniscus removed and had to be helped off the toilet by my now hubby.  It only lasted the first day though!  So hopefully it will be the same for you guys!
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  • Soon2BmrsMorenoSoon2BmrsMoreno

    haha. hey - youre entitled to think all you want. its not like?you?said it?out loud.

    you seem like a 'rise to the?occasion'?kinda gal - Im sure your actions will prove the opposite of awful next week.

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  • shnellyshnelly

    I'd say you're being realistic... But that's just me. Besides you said it in your head, not out loud. That is being a good wife; planning ahead and anticipating things. I hope his recovery is quick and he's back on his feet before you know it! (My DH had a hernia surgery when DC was 7 months, and couldn't hold him for months afterwards.) Good luck!

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  • tiki_ttiki_t
    Naw, I would be thinking that too. But in the mean time, to help you survive, you could give him sponge baths or wipe him down with baby wipes to keep the funk at bay.


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  • mrscerruti2bemrscerruti2be member
    I would totally think the exact same thoughts. 
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  • Mrs.K&CMrs.K&C

    I would think the exact same thing AND think that he was milking it if it went on longer than, oh, a day.

    DH probably needs shoulder surgery and I dread it like you wouldn't believe. 

     

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  • we-love-to-trywe-love-to-try
    you're not a bad wife at all. That sounds sucky! I would suggest getting a raised toilet seat so he can get on and off it by himself without help. The last thing I'd want to do is go in and help him after pooping. I deal with enough crap between work and Jenna. I don't need his, too!
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  • Jamers125Jamers125
    Ditto on the "realistic, not horrible" sentiment. No work for him = more work for you, and that's hard (and sucky). I wish him a super-quick recovery and minimal "milking it" for your sake!
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  • lunabeamlunabeam

    I don't blame you one bit for thinking these thoughts! But just because you think them doesn't mean you're not going to be there to help him when he really needs it.

    This sounds exactly like DH's hip surgery. I'll tell you, the recovery time WAS hard. And I didn't even have a child to worry about!

    But you'll be surprised at what he can actually do for himself...he can take crutches into the bathroom with him and use those to help himself stand up. And DH washed his hair in the sink.

    So yes, you'll be doing more chores and fetching things for him, but there ARE things that he will be able to take care of without you.


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  • bubbs147bubbs147

    Don't feel like that!  DH had knee surgery (ACL and meniscus repair, but they had to harvest some patella tendon which was the bad part!).  But we didn't have DD then.  It wasn't too bad, his parents came and helped for the first weekend.  He was able to get himself on and off the toilet (he could push on the countertop next to the toilet to lift on the good leg).  But he was on crutches for 6 or so weeks.  His best relief was the "ice man" - a cooler hooked up to a bladder that surrounded his leg in ice water.  He even kept it because he loved it so much!

    Good luck!

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  • AsawaAsawa

    no because I thought thesame thing while reading your post...

    the fact that you felt guilty says you are not a horrible wife..you just had a few "concerns".....

     we can both be horrible wives together.....

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