3rd Trimester

When will DH get it? :small vent::

Won't he get some kind of nesting instinct? As of now, we have no car seat in our cars, softball is a priority more than anything, it was a miracle the grass was cut yesterday and all the while there is so much to do that I've become physically unable to do! We still don't have many essentials like bottles, wipes, etc...

ugh...thanks for letting me vent a little. I was just hoping someone might say that "DH will get it really soon"....will anyone amuse me and tell me he'll get it before the baby's born?  :)

Re: When will DH get it? :small vent::

  • I just force mine.

    Or start to do it myself, and then he feels bad and does it.

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  • most likely not to be honest...but once the baby is here they do usually 'get it'.
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  • he will - my DH started nesting last week - he's able to do twice as much as me, too.  it's been a big help.
  • My DH got it after I freaked out at him a time or two, but he's a pretty responsible family guy as is.  He just wasn't moving at my pace :) 
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  • sorry I wish I had an answer. I think my DH is JUST NOW starting to get it. of course our car seat is still not installed, its just sitting on our living room floor being used as a cat nap space. But he did get a recent burst of energy and finish up the nursery, so I hope your DH gets in line soon!!
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  • Im past due and there is still no car seats in the cars. The nursery is not completed. The infant seat is still in the box. We do have the bassinet and swing together though. That's some progress. And he put a ceiling fan and light in the nursery. But we are not done by any means. My husband is extremely laid back. And I am the complete opposite. I'm trying not to think about it.
  • I'm not as far along as you are but I'm wondering when my DH will kick into "baby prep" mode, too, lol.  I keep trying to drop hints like, "I can't believe we only have nine weeks left!"  We have NO furniture in our nursery yet but we actually have plans to order the crib today so we'll at least have that in a few weeks. 

    We just have so many other things to do with the house, too, like hide our surround sound cables, lol.  They are are definitely sprawled across the living room floor & that's something that needs to be taken care of before we have LO crawling around, chewing on speaker wires! 

    DH is the frugal one so I ultimately let him decide when to spend large amounts of money... I'm just trying to nudge him along so we can make some progress!

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  • My dad always told me that men don't become fathers until they actually hold their babies and that it's normal for them to just not get it until it happens. DH has been awesome but sometimes I just have to remind myself that it'll all change when he actually has solid evidence in his hands.
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  • afgafg member

    Have you asked him to do this stuff if it's bothering you?

    i don't think MH would ever think "oh, I better run out and buy some wipes" uless I spelled it out for him.

  • Well, DH and I are both very type A and obsessive about stuff.  So, DH has been "nesting" for a while now.  But -- it's not exactly what I want him to be doing!  He keeps coming up with his own ideas of projects that have to be completed before the baby comes -- and NONE of them are things I care about (new landscaping, new blinds for the whole house, etc.).

    Just do the stuff on your own, and keep asking for help.  For the stuff you really can't do alone, I'd just try to make him schedule a time to do it.

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  • DH is very helpful.... I just have to tell him what he needs to do :) We still have a few things to put together, and we have lots of cleaning to do. I've been giving him jobs for the past week, and he hasn't complained yet.
  • Mine is very laid back and if he doesn't enjoy the task, it will take forever for him to get around to it unless I really b!tch him out.  I'm done bitching him out because I don't need the stress or do I want to put a strain on the relationship. Bitching him out did backfire on me when it came to painting the nursery, so I'm not going there again! LOL.  I've reminded him several times in the last two weeks that he needed to pick up his stamp collection off the floor in one room before our electrician comes. If it doesn't happen by this Saturday, I'm doing it.

     (edit - how weird the Bump "***" the word b!tch, but not "bitching" !)

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  • cedenscedens member

    i have the same issue... i am pissed because we have a half rennovated master bedroom and i have been sleeping on the damn couch for 3 months and not to mention my BIL just moved out of our nursery but left tons of trash and stuff he didn't want for us to clean up after him...

    dh works 10am-11pm everyday but sunday so he just doesnt have the time to take on this stuff and refuses help from my family... stubborn headed...

    so now ive got furniture boxes (3 of them- dresser, crib and chest of drawers), all of the babys stuff from shower and stuff that ive purchased, and all of her clothes in a hamper, sitting in my living room!...

    i need to wash everrything, put the whole nursery together (it needs carpet taken up, hardwood floors refinished and to be painted)..

    the house needs to be throughly cleaned since its been collecting dust and dog fur for the past few months and i cant physically move the boxes around to clean so it's been cleaned half-assed...

    so yeah...i def feel you're pain... i know i will be 40 weeks and still complaining that crap isnt done... so ive just shut my mouth bc nothing has worked- i've tried telling him what to do on what day and he doesnt get all of it done or has other things he needs to do first, i cant do it myself (the big things that are left bc i am on modified bedrest and not to mention, it's just impossible for me to put all the nursery together myself at this point!)

  • I have the opposite problem with my DH...he is soooo impatient..that when we buy something for the nursery...or like when we first found out we were expecting, he wanted to get the nursery done like yesterday! LOL!  I guess it's a good thing that I didn't have to bug him to get things done...he just did.  Smile
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  • give  him the evil eye when u tell him to do something!
  • I know how you feel...

    My SOs only job is to take out the trash and he can't even get that done. I have to literally bag it up and set it in front of the door to motivate him to do it. ugh...men.

  • MH is overseas so I just do it all myself. It wasn't hard to install the carseat. I've done loads of laundry. Put together all of the other stuff. It's really not that bad. I just know it has to be done so I do it.
  • Don't worry car seats take 10 seconds to put in, DH can always go home and install it while your at the hospital. And don't worry he will soon get it.... they all do.....
  • imageJen2004:
    Don't worry car seats take 10 seconds to put in, DH can always go home and install it while your at the hospital. And don't worry he will soon get it.... they all do.....

     

    We put DD's in at the hospital in the parking garage the day we went home. It's really quite easy. I take out and re-install the car seats all the time. Actually DH and I "compete" now whenever we take out/put in the seats.

  • I told my DH that we had to get some more stuff b/c we didnt get everything we needed from the shower (crib sheets, etc). I told him we didnt have to run out and get it this exact moment, but I feel unprepared and want to have the stuff soon. He said, "you dont understand, this is our time and it is hard for me to spend every waking minute on the baby b/c I know she will be born soon- I want to spend as much time with you as I can..."

    At first I thought this was sweet, but then he plays on the computer and never takes me anywhere. I think the men are just trying to stay "boys" a little longer before they are forced to grow up and be "men". 

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