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Tell me about "old eggs"

DavezWifeDavezWife member
in Success after IF

(TTTC lurkers, please feel free to chime in)

So I turn 36 at the end of this month (whoopiedefrickendoo) and at the moment, I'm freaking about having "old eggs".

My bloodwork in this regard has come back normal. I didn't start getting my period until almost age 18 (actually had gene karotyping done b/c RE thought that was weird, genes are normal) but I can't seem to find anything online that says whether or not I'll have delayed onset of menopause or not. My mom started 'the change" mid 50's, her mom died young.

Most of you know our recent m/c was determined to be a baby with Trisomy 13. Most of my research says this is more common with older couples. (Davez is 9 months older than me). The same obsessive reading says lightening struck once, and odds says it'd be super freaky if it struck us again.

 Well, I was sitting fine with this info until I talked at length with "Dear Sweet CoWorker" who's had MAJOR IF issues. Ends up, she had a T13 baby m/c at 11 weeks, then her NEXT pregnancy was a T21 baby lost at 20 weeks.

CHIT! WTF?  um, lightening. ah, twice.

(she now has beautiful b/g twins d/t DE)

So I guess if you have any wise words, bookmarks, reading, whatever, that will teach me more about "old eggs" and how I tell or rule out I'm fine.... well, send them my way.

(ps - this "grasping at straws crap" I'm doing WILL eventually stop, I promise. lol)

thanks!

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Re: Tell me about "old eggs"

  • jensnebjensneb
    FWIW I think it's just chance...my mom had a successful pregnancy at age 36 and 38.  Although my brother and I do make fun of my now 18 year old sister for having come from old eggs. I wish you luck, and I say don't give up.
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  • Temp848906437505510Temp848906437505510

    Many women have babies without a problem at 36, 39, and 42.  And, others don't.  Your FSH level is one indication, but, it's not the be all and end all.  Really, it's a combination of that and what happens when you cycle.

    There is no definitive information on how many years you will have your period after you start.  There are some studies that show the earlier you get it, the longer you will have it, but, my mother got hers at 9 (as did I) and she also went into menopause in her early 50's, like your mother.  Oh, and she also had a baby at 37, an oops pregnancy, so, no correlation between her fertility and mine.

    There's so much uncertainty in all of this....

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  • karenandjeffkarenandjeff
    I can definitly appreciate your concern with "old eggs".  We had two losses, one at age 31 and one recently at age 34 ( due to trisomy 16).  I freaked out to my RE and asked him if I had "old eggs".   My RE basically explained that trisomy losses are random and no indication of old eggs. The mother and father's age does play a factor because it does happen a little more frequently than say someone who is under thirty, but it does not indicate all of our eggs are bad.  It's just "bad luck" happening a little more often unfortunately with couples our age.  I am really sorry for your loss, your concerns mirror my own and I have been a nervous wreck so far this pregnancy because of our losses.  I pray everything turns out OK, I will be 35 by the time I give birth and DH is 36.  We also would love to have a few more, God willing.  Hang in there, again, I am very sorry for your loss.
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  • JGirl2005JGirl2005 member

    I'm 36.5 - will be 37 in 5 months.  I've had two known miscarraiges - one was due to IC - and chromosomes were good....other was at 5wks and was likely due to chromosomes but I didn't have a D&C. 

    I will say try not to focus on it.  I know people 42 who got pregnant and had no problems....i know it doesnt happen everyday.  I hope we get another kid and I feel my age isn't a factor right now, but who knows....we aren't trying right now either.

    I know you can feel really anxious about going again after m/c.  It's hard and is scary.

    I will say that it's not just about old eggs, but the key is the embryo.  So while everything could be perfect with your egg, Davez could be shooting a bad sperm your way.  You just 'never' know.  Focus on your FSH is good.

    Remember that although heartbreaking, m/c's happen more than we think.  Most happen before the person knows they are pregnant - and those are ppl not on here or on TTTC since we test ASAP, but you know in the general population they are very common.  Later ones happen less, but...

    I felt like you, man, really.  I not only lost my one baby, but my remaining two frozen embryos didn't make it because one or more had a chromosome problem....that freaked me out because I was like 'man maybe all my embryos were bad'.  'they froze the best of the best and I still got bad embryos.'  that is a tough pill to swallow, but know that every pregnancy is different.  Yes, it happens more to AMAs and (even advanced fathers...).  but we 'can' get good embryos.  DH's urologist was a total jerk saying 'kids are overrated' (no joke).  And he said 'well it would have been  better for you guys if HE (DH) was younger as quality does go down with men too'.  thanks you jacka$$.  anyway...it's not all about bad eggs.

    Look at the positives - you can and have got pregnant.  I know those are not comforting words, but I'm trying.

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  • DavezWifeDavezWife member
    I appreciate the attempts... lol... really. thanks!
    Join us - Commit Random Acts of Kindness, and say "I did it for Cricket" Cricket's Cadence
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