Telling DH

Em&Bee · May 2009

Although I'm afraid I'm going to jinx something, at only 4 1/2 weeks, I figured I need to tell DH at some point. I got some cute onesies to wrap up and give to DH at dinner (on Father's Day....blech...cliche, I know). So, I got a St. Louis Cardinals #5, a KISS (with makeup), one that says "Turd Ferguson" (from a Saturday Night Live skit), and one that says, "I'm sorry the card says Moops" (from Seinfeld). I just wanted to do something fun.

Probably not too original, but I don't have a lot of time to plan.

Nicole731 · May 2009

Wow, how can you possibly wait another 3 weeks to tell him?? I told DH as soon as I found out with both.

Kristen0709 · May 2009

How are you not telling him? DH found out when I did.

ninasc · May 2009

I don't know how you can wait either! I told him as soon as I saw that second line.

Mrs.KLF · May 2009

You're going to wait until Father's Day?! Wow, you've got more will power than me. I told DH as soon as he walked in the door, and I just said "I've got something to tell you!!".

mrs_sherod · May 2009

Wow, you are good at keep it under wraps. I was so shocked, I called DH in the bathroom and demanded he read the stick! Those are all cute ideas.

eilathen · May 2009

Where did you find the Turd Furgerson onesie? That's super hilarous!

Autumn_bride2b · May 2009

Wait, you haven't told him yet? I blurted it out the moment he walked in the door the day I got my BFP.

justrachet · May 2009

That's a long time to wait to tell him! My DH was in the bathroom with me when I POAS. Plus, he would have been very concerned about why I was throwing up every morning and super lazy every evening, had he not known.

ETA: Those onesies sound super cute.

easjer05 · May 2009

Wow, that's wild. DH was with me when I tested, so he's known all along. I don't know how I would have made it this far without his knowing and supporting me.

kellmo · May 2009

When I found out I was pregnant my dh was away. I wanted to wait until he came home rather than telling him on the phone. I had to wait like 24 hrs. I was going nuts. I just wanted to be excited together!! So when he came home I gave him a card and the 2 yes 2 pregnancy tests I took that were positive. I put a bow on them. He was so happy! I just couldn't imagine waiting any longer than that!

MrsRebecca · May 2009

I told him as soon as I took the test. I think my H would be pissed if I waited two months to tell him. Are you sure he'll be glad you waited?

Jule_Z · May 2009

I don't understand why you're waiting so long to tell your DH...

I actually POAS, set it down on the counter without looking, and walked away. DH went in and checked it and came back and told me that I'm pregnant.

holly&jared · May 2009

the onesie ideas are fun & cute! there is NO way i could wait, though. i marched myself (pee stick in hand) into the kitchen where dh was, & stuck it in his face. i was too excited to keep that one to myself! good luck!

Suzi-G- · May 2009

Wow! I can't even imagine pulling that off. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and waving the peestick in his face. LOL And you did IVF how does your DH NOT know it's time to test? Won't he wonder what's going on if you aren't making plans for next cycle?

ETA: actually I don't remember if you did IUI or IVF but I think I remember you from the TTTC board... right?

Em&Bee · May 2009

I know, it's hard to wait, but I'll have my first u/s before then, so maybe I'll feel even more confident about it. We aren't telling anyone else til the end of July.

Dvnah · May 2009

talk about self control! dh suspected along with me and was there when i peen on the stick.

Temp785382312506150 · May 2009

Personally, my DH would be pissed if I knew I was pregnant for 3 weeks and didn't tell him. He's been with me every step of the way through this and would feel very slighted that I kept it a secret from him. He found out about 5 min. after I did. While your idea is sweet, you can still tell him now and give him the baby items for Father's Day.

krissyh21 · May 2009

Umm - this is his baby too. He has every right to know when you know. "Jinxing" or not.

Em&Bee · May 2009

I just had my HCGs this week, so it wasn't hard to wait. I just told him I'd have the results in a week or so, believe me, we're used to waiting every month after 3 years.

Now that I look at the calendar though, I guess Father's Day is farther away than I thought, so I'll probably tell him once I get all of the onesies.

BTW, I got the Turd Ferguson shirt at cafepress.com, they have literally like 2,300 onesies (or what ever they call them). I wanted SO badly to get one that said "I heart Horatio", because I watch CSI Miami and DH hates it.

Nicole731 · May 2009

Em&Bee:
I know, it's hard to wait, but I'll have my first u/s before then, so maybe I'll feel even more confident about it. We aren't telling anyone else til the end of July.

Am I reading this right? You aren't telling him you are pregnant, and you aren't inviting him for your very first ultrasound to see the baby that belongs to him also? Wowww.

libertadw · May 2009

I am with Krissy, he has a right to know now. With my first I didn't tell him until the next day because I wasnt sure it was right. He was very upset that I waited until the next day. With this one, I sent him a pic of the test because I couldn't wait to tell him in person.

If I were you I would take him out to dinner and tell him asap.

Em&Bee · May 2009

Suzi-G-:

ETA: actually I don't remember if you did IUI or IVF but I think I remember you from the TTTC board... right?

Yeah, we had 6 failed IUI's and finally did 1 IVF. He won't be mad that I didn't tell him sooner, he'll be excited that I'm sure everything is going good so far. I definitely wanted to wait until after the hcg's to tell him, just in case.

Jule_Z · May 2009

Sooo....you're not telling him in case something happens? If you miscarry, your DH would just never find out that you were pg in the first place? That is really...strange.

Luv-a-Bug · May 2009

ninasc:
I don't know how you can wait either! I told him as soon as I saw that second line.

Same here.. I had to make sure that I wasn't just seeing things.

TexasMom86 · May 2009

Em&Bee:
I know, it's hard to wait, but I'll have my first u/s before then, so maybe I'll feel even more confident about it. We aren't telling anyone else til the end of July.

If you plan on waiting till after your first ultrasound I think you are crazy. He would want to be there with you for that experience. I know when first saw that little blob on the screen, both me and my DH almost started to cry. I think by not telling him you are taking away the experience from. You might just want to reconsider it's possible he could be upset.

krissyh21 · May 2009

Em&Bee:
I just had my HCGs this week, so it wasn't hard to wait. I just told him I'd have the results in a week or so, believe me, we're used to waiting every month after 3 years.

Now that I look at the calendar though, I guess Father's Day is farther away than I thought, so I'll probably tell him once I get all of the onesies.

BTW, I got the Turd Ferguson shirt at cafepress.com, they have literally like 2,300 onesies (or what ever they call them). I wanted SO badly to get one that said "I heart Horatio", because I watch CSI Miami and DH hates it.

After THREE years you don't think he waited long enough for the news? Why do you deserve to be happy for a MONTH longer then him? My H was on the phone every hour from the second I went to get the blood test done after waiting SIX years. He was SO THRILLED - I would never ever with hold that information from him ever. Even if fathers day was a week away!

What you are doing is cruel. PERIOD!

Besides the fact that my H was with me holding my hand for my first u/s and would not trade the wonder and amazement on his face for the life of me.

12bailey18 · May 2009

easjer05:
Wow, that's wild.? DH was with me when I tested, so he's known all along.? I don't know how I would have made it this far without his knowing and supporting me.

This exactly!?

Suzi-G- · May 2009

I just don't understand how he doesn't know how long HCG results take. Maybe my DH was overly involved but each cycle he could tell you what day I O'ed and he could count forward and tell you exactly when we would be able to test. There's no way he'd fall for a magical 5 week luteal phase.

Em&Bee · May 2009

Nicole731:

Em&Bee:
I know, it's hard to wait, but I'll have my first u/s before then, so maybe I'll feel even more confident about it. We aren't telling anyone else til the end of July.

Am I reading this right? You aren't telling him you are pregnant, and you aren't inviting him for your very first ultrasound to see the baby that belongs to him also? Wowww.

Uh yeah, you're reading it right. If I thought he'd be pissed I'd obviously tell him sooner. My DH doesn't have the luxury of going with me to every appointment, or any at all for that matter, so I'm sure if he finds out a week or two after me, he'll still be thrilled.

Temp785382312506150 · May 2009

Nicole731:

Em&Bee:
I know, it's hard to wait, but I'll have my first u/s before then, so maybe I'll feel even more confident about it. We aren't telling anyone else til the end of July.

Am I reading this right? You aren't telling him you are pregnant, and you aren't inviting him for your very first ultrasound to see the baby that belongs to him also? Wowww.

My thoughts exactly. This is....weird.

breech · May 2009

i called DH at work. there was no way i could have waited.

MissyC979 · May 2009

krissyh21:
Umm - this is his baby too. He has every right to know when you know. "Jinxing" or not.

Ditto this. I think it is unfair to him that you are waiting to tell him. He should know now, whether things go well or not at your ultrasound. He is a part of this--it is not just your secret to share with him when you feel the time is right.

jenna0627 · May 2009

Mikes_Wife06:
Nicole731:

Em&Bee:
I know, it's hard to wait, but I'll have my first u/s before then, so maybe I'll feel even more confident about it. We aren't telling anyone else til the end of July.

Am I reading this right? You aren't telling him you are pregnant, and you aren't inviting him for your very first ultrasound to see the baby that belongs to him also? Wowww.

My thoughts exactly. This is....weird.

Do you not have a close relationship with your DH? I can't understand not telling him. If I hadn't told DH and he missed the first U/S he would have been beyong pissed. You are pregnant with his child!!!!

getnmarried910 · May 2009

I don't think my DH would be mad, but disappointed that I waited so long to tell him. It's just as much his baby as it is mine and he has every right to know when I did. Because he was still asleep when I tested, I left the test on the bathroom counter knowing he'd go straight there when he woke up. OK, he would be royally pissed if I went to an ultrasound without him. My DH doesn't have the luxury of going to every appointment, but ultrasounds, he takes off work or I schedule them at the end of the day so he can work over a couple days before and leave early. He would be mad if I got to see the baby and he didn't. It's one thing if my doctor had a machine in office and checked every appointment, other than the two emergency ones I had, if all goes smoothly, I get one at 20 weeks and one at 30-32 weeks. DH deserves to be there too.

Two years ago, I couldn't wait two days for Fathers Day to tell DH we were having a boy. I handed him his fathers day card on Friday as soon as he got home from work. There's no way I could keep something like having a pregnancy. Not to mention he'd get the clue when I wanted fast food all the stinking time.

AdamsWife08 · May 2009

How can you make him wait any longer when he's waited so long in the first place. My DH would've been pissed had I done this to him and I can't imagine going to my first u/s without him. I was so nervous, scared, and excited I needed him there just for someone to talk to. Tell him tonight, he deserves to know!!

happydragon · May 2009

wow. why tell him at all? just wait til the baby comes and hand it over then.

is this post even real? what your point? did you just want to talk about onesies? maybe you should have given more background info or something....or maybe instead of getting defensive you could explain why you are waiting. of course not telling your husband youre pregnant is going to ring as wacked to people. what are you going to do if you mc? tell him then?

Em&Bee · May 2009

Obviously IF hasn't totally consumed our lives (ex. my husband tracking my cycle), we still have plenty of other things to keep our minds occupied. We've discussed what he can and can't take time off for and he has no desire to go to an u/s unless there's a heartbeat or something..........and here's another one for ya....he also has no desire to be in the room when I deliver either (gasp ! ! ! ). I think you're all being a little judgmental.

jenna0627 · May 2009

Em&Bee:

Obviously IF hasn't totally consumed our lives (ex. my husband tracking my cycle), we still have plenty of other things to keep our minds occupied. We've discussed what he can and can't take time off for and he has no desire to go to an u/s unless there's a heartbeat or something..........and here's another one for ya....he also has no desire to be in the room when I deliver either (gasp ! ! ! ). I think you're all being a little judgmental.

Is this MUD?

kimberleigh30 · May 2009

I understand not telling family members right away, but your own DH?. Sorry, but a little strange if I say so myself.

huskerchica · May 2009

wow, wow, wow......

I went through infertility myself, and I can't imagine not sharing everything with my husband.

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