Birthing through the pain...

allie_smalls07 · May 2009

I'm going to be flamed for this, but it's all good. I feel like women have really lost faith in their ability to give birth...

Watch the Business of Being Born & read Birthing From Within if you want to be empowered.

Ladies, we are made for this - I know it sounds cheesy but remember what the pain is there for, it is for a good cause! And I do not believe in the statement, "All that matters in the end is a 'happy healthy baby'" What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions and interruption to the natural process of mother/baby bonding because they were forced into a c-section when their induction failed to produce results, pitocin made them crazy and they begged for an epidural, and then ended up with a c-section when everything "failed to progress."

By no means am I judging any of you, but I am trying to encourage you all to find your inner strength and birth through the pain.

You were made for this.

*Caress* · May 2009

Double thumbs up!! Yes Yes

JCM083009 · May 2009

I agree 100% with everything you said...FOR ME. However, I know not everyone agrees with or understands that (which does make me sad in a sense just b/c it IS so incredible what our bodies are meant to do). To each their own. What gets to me, more than anything, is the women who just simply aren't informed either way and go into it blind. That's scary to me.

Mrs.Boeck · May 2009

Well said! I am not against epis for people that want them. I am just choosing to go without! I figure if so many women before us could do it, then so can I!

oohlalagirl · May 2009

TimsMayBride · May 2009

allie_smalls07:

What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions

No. This is a huge disservice to the women suffering from ppd.

allie_smalls07:

By no means am I judging any of you

It sure sounds like it! I appreciate your concern for the ladies on the board, but it comes across like you are judging them for being uneducated. It is possible to educate yourself and still come down on the other side of the fence.

dmogmo · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
I'm going to be flamed for this, but it's all good. I feel like women have really lost faith in their ability to give birth...
Watch the Business of Being Born & read Birthing From Within if you want to be empowered.
Ladies, we are made for this - I know it sounds cheesy but remember what the pain is there for, it is for a good cause! And I do not believe in the statement, "All that matters in the end is a 'happy healthy baby'" What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions and interruption to the natural process of mother/baby bonding because they were forced into a c-section when their induction failed to produce results, pitocin made them crazy and they begged for an epidural, and then ended up with a c-section when everything "failed to progress."
By no means am I judging any of you, but I am trying to encourage you all to find your inner strength and birth through the pain.
You were made for this.

WOW. That's a little much, don't you think? I was not forced into my c-section and I am not depressed because of it. My body had no interest in going into labor. I went through a full course of pitocin (w/o an epi) and never truly went into labor - and saw no indication that going through it all over again would increase the odds of a vag delivery. At 41 weeks, it was clear that MY body was NOT made to do this.

MarriedJackie · May 2009

I do know that I was made for this, and I do admire all the changes/accommodations my body has made....it is truly amazing. I understand that birth is a natural process and I know that if there were no drugs I COULD do it...but I also know my pain threshold, what I can handle mentally...and I would much rather have comfort if offered to me, rather than be miserable and hate the experience.

allie_smalls07 · May 2009

TimsMayBride:
allie_smalls07:

What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions

No. This is a huge disservice to the women suffering from ppd.

allie_smalls07:

By no means am I judging any of you

It sure sounds like it! I appreciate your concern for the ladies on the board, but it comes across like you are judging them for being uneducated. It is possible to educate yourself and still come down on the other side of the fence.

Absolutely no, not at all. I completely understand why you might think that, but no, I am just trying to encourage everyone to believe in the power of their own body. I was (and still am sometimes) on the fence about my desire for a natural childbirth, but I find the more positive, encouraging material I read the more prepared I feel to accept the challenge. It also helps me to build up my confidence by helping others to build their's.

I am not implying that anyone is uneducated, rather I am imploring all women to educate themselves.

DonnysBride09 · May 2009

TimsMayBride:
allie_smalls07:

What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions

No. This is a huge disservice to the women suffering from ppd.

allie_smalls07:

By no means am I judging any of you

It sure sounds like it! I appreciate your concern for the ladies on the board, but it comes across like you are judging them for being uneducated. It is possible to educate yourself and still come down on the other side of the fence.

Yes

Jimsgirl5821 · May 2009

not everyone's body is made for it though. I have a friend who had her baby last month. They had her trying to push for hours on end and insisted she could do it. Finally she was so exhausted and the baby was stressed they did a c-section. But she had internal bleeding and blood clots at that point because of all the straining and pushing. She ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks. They kept saying, its a 6-7 lb baby, no reason you cant push. Turns out it was a 9 lb 4 oz baby and she couldnt. I think people need to do what is right for them.

julygal · May 2009

I have never taken solace in the fact "women have done this for centuries" or "pain with purpose" type talk. I know my body was made to do this and I know that I can do it. I have done it once before and it hurt. I didn't care about the purpose of the pain, but how could I get through the labor to have a successful vaginal delivery. For me that was going into labor after my due date on my own accord, taking the epi when I could no longer handle the pain at 3 cm, and accepting pitocin when things began to slow down. I had no other interventions in the vaginal delivery of my DD and I was very happy with how things went. I was able to nurse my DD and have all the bonding we needed. Not all epis and pitocin end in a c-section. I hope my labor and delivery go as smoothly this time around.

manda_mullins · May 2009

I'm curious: has the op given birth before?

allie_smalls07 · May 2009

Jimsgirl5821:
not everyone's body is made for it though. I have a friend who had her baby last month. They had her trying to push for hours on end and insisted she could do it. Finally she was so exhausted and the baby was stressed they did a c-section. But she had internal bleeding and blood clots at that point because of all the straining and pushing. She ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks. They kept saying, its a 6-7 lb baby, no reason you cant push. Turns out it was a 9 lb 4 oz baby and she couldnt. I think people need to do what is right for them.

Yes, people should do what is right for them, I wonder though in what position was she trying to push? Did she have an epidural?

And just to comment on a previous quoter that my assessment regarding post partum depression was a disservice (or something to that effect) - obviously I know this is not the case for ALL ppd sufferers! But I have spoken with a lot moms who DO feel this is what happened to them. I have also met some mothers who ended up with c-sections and were fine with it.

My point was to encourage people, not to start a war about who's right and wrong.

J+O · May 2009

I agree, and wanted a med free birthing experience but I developed pre-e. ? I am thankful for the options we are given, and that women do have a choice and when nature doesn't work out perfectly we are able to still deliver healthy babies. ?

So although I know you're trying to empower women, your post is also making some feel powerless. ?Like I was. ?

Ps. I had to have pit and after 14 hours of labor caved to pain medication. ?I was in labor for over 50 hours. ?And I give birth vaginally to a 9lb 15oz. baby! ?I think I deserve a medal either way

?

FutureHardings · May 2009

People have been doing this for a long time, yes. Women were very likely to die during labor as well.

MamaBrooke · May 2009

You make it sound like all inductions lead to negative experiences for the mother...I was induced with Pitocin, did not have any pain medications, had a vag delivery and I can assure you I "birthed through the pain."

dmogmo · May 2009

manda_mullins:
I'm curious: has the op given birth before?

I would like to know this as well.

Jules G · May 2009

So what you're saying is that I am going to have ppd because I'm choosing to have a medicated birth?!? Maybe you should educate yourself a little more before posting a statement like that!?

Also, how would you feel if I tried to 'encourage' you to take meds rather than going natural? I think in this case, you should maybe keep your opinions to yourself. ?

allie_smalls07 · May 2009

manda_mullins:
I'm curious: has the op given birth before?

No, I haven't...not sure where you're going with that though. I wasn't saying it's easy.

It's funny to me that when one tries to encourage others, they automatically become the target of questions such as this one. I don't necessarily see the relevance. Just because I haven't done it YET doesn't mean I cannot state my convictions to rally other women to try it along with me. I do have a mother who gave birth to 4 children naturally and I also have family members who have given birth via cesearean. So, I am not seeing the world through rose colored glasses if that is what your question implies Smile

Kellina · May 2009

I'm all for going natural if that's what you want, but since you know you'll be flamed- here you go!

What do medical "interventions" have to do with PPD??? I do believe that has to do with the hormonal changes after having a baby, no matter HOW it came out.

I had a sched c/s on medical advice from my dr due to baby's large size. I dilated to 4 prior to having it as I went into labor on my own. Baby did not move down AT ALL and he should've by that point. 9lb 11oz baby out of my 5'1" petite frame doesn't work so well.

And prior to medical interventions, I wouldn't have known I had GD and that baby could've been 13lb and we both would have probably died.

dmogmo · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
manda_mullins:
I'm curious: has the op given birth before?
No, I haven't...not sure where you're going with that though. I wasn't saying it's easy.
It's funny to me that when one tries to encourage others, they automatically become the target of questions such as this one. I don't necessarily see the relevance. Just because I haven't done it YET doesn't mean I cannot state my convictions to rally other women to try it along with me. I do have a mother who gave birth to 4 children naturally and I also have family members who have given birth via cesearean. So, I am not seeing the world through rose colored glasses if that is what your question implies

I'm sorry. Making a connection between choosing/accepting interventions and poor bonding and PPD is not encouraging. Especially if you've never been through of it, IMO.

disbride061103 · May 2009

As someone who has had a c/s, I am EXTREMELY offended by your remarks regarding natural childbirth, c/s and ppd. I would have LOVED to given birth naturally, but DS was breech I so I had a c/s. I did not suffer from ppd, but it took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I had to have a c/s. And you know what helped me, thinking that I had the most beautiful little boy and that he was happy and healthy. And THAT is ALL that matters. It doesn't matter how he got here, only that he is here and he is the best thing that I have ever done.

To have someone who has never given birth and who has never been told that no you won't even get the chance to feel a single contraction let alone push your baby out, you really are very judgemental.

It is none of your business how anyone else gives birth and it certainly isn't your place to say that people who have c/s "forced" on them are going to wind up with ppd. Get off your high horse.

Kellina · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
manda_mullins:
I'm curious: has the op given birth before?

No, I haven't...not sure where you're going with that though. I wasn't saying it's easy.

It's funny to me that when one tries to encourage others, they automatically become the target of questions such as this one. I don't necessarily see the relevance. Just because I haven't done it YET doesn't mean I cannot state my convictions to rally other women to try it along with me. I do have a mother who gave birth to 4 children naturally and I also have family members who have given birth via cesearean. So, I am not seeing the world through rose colored glasses if that is what your question implies

You're becoming a target because you're not encouraging, you're saying people get PPD because of having a medicated birth. If this were the case, there would be a LOT more PPD.

Are you friends with Tom Cruise by chance? LOL!

DBride2006 · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
; What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions and interruption to the natural process of mother/baby bonding because they were forced into a c-section when their induction failed to produce results, pitocin made them crazy and they begged for an epidural, and then ended up with a c-section when everything "failed to progress."
?
By no means am I judging any of you, but I am trying to encourage you all to find your inner strength and birth through the pain.?
You were made for this.

I just happen to be one of those mothers who had pitocin AND an epidural and it worked out just fine. I had a relatively short, easy labor, was comfortable and coherent in those precious few moments after my son was born and I was able to hold and breast feed him within minutes, despite pretty severe tearing. He's nearly 5 months and we're still exclusively breast feeding and I had NO sign of PPD.

I wouldn't change a thing about my labor and delivery experience. Not EVERYONE who gets pregnant is "made for this" or else mothers wouldn't die in childbirth.?

I get your point... if you want an "intervention-free" birth, I wish you lots of luck and more power to you for encouraging others who choose this route. But your whole rambling fallacy about PPD being caused by interventions is flawed. You could have made your point without all that business. I'd also wait until you get through your own birth experience before preaching to others... it may be much different than you expect. I educated myself and went into my delivery with a very open mind, which is (in my opinion) the best way to prevent disappointment.

Jules G · May 2009

disbride061103:
It is none of your business how anyone else gives birth and it certainly isn't your place to say that people who have c/s "forced" on them are going to wind up with ppd.? Get off your high horse.?

Agree with this 100%?

allie_smalls07 · May 2009

Jules G:

So what you're saying is that I am going to have ppd because I'm choosing to have a medicated birth?!? Maybe you should educate yourself a little more before posting a statement like that!

Also, how would you feel if I tried to 'encourage' you to take meds rather than going natural? I think in this case, you should maybe keep your opinions to yourself.

Wow, I think you're reaching a bit there...your translation is a tad too literal.

As far as people trying to encourage me to take meds, I face that on a daily basis and my response is this, "I'm choosing to do it this way, you chose to do it that way, fine." End of story.

In fairness, I did acknowledge I might draw some flames for my OP so I welcome the challenge.

pivey · May 2009

manda_mullins:
I'm curious: has the op given birth before?

Yeahhhh. And I did med-free.

You need to remove yourself from the high-horse OP. Every mom does what is right for her. While you believe in med-free and lots of educations some people just don't and you can't ram it down their throats. Ever. Backfires every time.

disbride061103 · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
manda_mullins:
I'm curious: has the op given birth before?

No, I haven't...not sure where you're going with that though. I wasn't saying it's easy.

It's funny to me that when one tries to encourage others, they automatically become the target of questions such as this one. I don't necessarily see the relevance. Just because I haven't done it YET doesn't mean I cannot state my convictions to rally other women to try it along with me. I do have a mother who gave birth to 4 children naturally and I also have family members who have given birth via cesearean. So, I am not seeing the world through rose colored glasses if that is what your question implies

But you aren't trying to encourage others, you are telling people that if they have medicated births or c/s, they are going to have ppd. And just because you know people who have given birth, does not mean that you have any idea of what it's like to give birth. Next you are going to tell me that since i had a c/s I didn't give birth to my son.

StaceySnGeorgia · May 2009

FutureHardings:
People have been doing this for a long time, yes. Women were very likely to die during labor as well.

This! We have advancements in medicine for a reason. I think a woman that is PG knows already to educate herself with her choices/options. Thank God mortality rates aren't what they used to be...

Reality hits once it happens and each case deserves it's one judgment. No two women are the same.

Kellina · May 2009

BTW, I can't wait to read your birth story... Maybe you'll have an orgasmic birth AND zero baby blues!!

manda_mullins · May 2009

Temp159135562506975 · May 2009

i love it when one propagnada film makes everyone an expert.

i choose to let medical docs be my guide... not talk show hosts. Epis are safe- and they take away pain. I'm all for taking away pain.

Next time you get a headache.... i suggest you just deal with it and not take anything..... since so many of you seem to think that pain is no big deal and we should all find our inner strength.

do what YOU want to do - but don't preach crap to others b/c you watched a stupid movie and now think you know it all.

brandonsfuturewife07 · May 2009

allie_smalls07:

Ladies, we are made for this - I know it sounds cheesy but remember what the pain is there for, it is for a good cause! And I do not believe in the statement, "All that matters in the end is a 'happy healthy baby'" What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions and interruption to the natural process of mother/baby bonding because they were forced into a c-section when their induction failed to produce results, pitocin made them crazy and they begged for an epidural, and then ended up with a c-section when everything "failed to progress."

what about when your baby's heart decels? and even though you did progress and pushed for 3 hours, he just wouldn't come out? what about when you get PTSD from that? what about when your dr says, "don't worry, i won't cut until we absolutely have to?"

what about judgmental biitches like you who make real women feel bad about their experiences.

good luck at your c/s!!!

DanielsWife · May 2009

manda_mullins FTW!

Seriously, why do some posters feel the need to post this? I'm all for going natural, but really, if things happen and complications arise - even things that the most "detailed" birth plan cannot forsee - I'm not going to feel like a big loser for having to have medical intervention.

And connecting interventions with PPD? Not cool.?

JCM083009 · May 2009

FutureHardings:
People have been doing this for a long time, yes. Women were very likely to die during labor as well.

Actually, the mortality rate in the US is higher than they have been in decades and higher than any other industrialized country. I'm not sure our interventions and C sections are really saving that many woman and babies.

Jules G · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
Jules G:

So what you're saying is that I am going to have ppd because I'm choosing to have a medicated birth?!? Maybe you should educate yourself a little more before posting a statement like that!?
Also, how would you feel if I tried to 'encourage' you to take meds rather than going natural? I think in this case, you should maybe keep your opinions to yourself. ?
Wow, I think you're reaching a bit there...your translation is a tad too literal.
As far as people trying to encourage me to take meds, I face that on a daily basis and my response is this, "I'm choosing to do it this way, you chose to do it that way, fine."? End of story.
In fairness, I did acknowledge I might draw some flames for my OP so I welcome the challenge.?

Exactly! So if you have others asking why you've decided against meds, why question a person who is taking meds while also telling them that they will develop ppd? Every person is entitled to their own opinion, but you can't post your thoughts & opinions on a public board & not expect a reaction. I honestly wish you the best going non-medicated, but I will say that things don't always go the way you think they will & that maybe you should think about that before suggesting to others what decisions to make in their own lives.?

Jules G · May 2009

Kellina:
BTW, I can't wait to read your birth story... Maybe you'll have an orgasmic birth AND zero baby blues!!

LOL!?

allie_smalls07 · May 2009

So ANYWAY, anyone who wants to be encouraged by this, please be my guest. If it offends you then I apologize in advance, but that was not its' original purpose. I am not on a high horse, let me point that out. I am passionate about the topic though and I know there are many others who feel the same way.

If you are interested in learning more about the subject, I would still recommend the book and the documentary.

Good night everyone, whether you agree with me or not, I wish you all safe and happy deliveries. And of course, healthy and happy babies too.

HeyyRed · May 2009

allie_smalls07:
I'm going to be flamed for this, but it's all good.? I feel like women have really lost faith in their ability to give birth...
Watch the Business of Being Born & read Birthing From Within if you want to be empowered.
Ladies, we are made for this - I know it sounds cheesy but remember what the pain is there for, it is for a good cause!? And I do not believe in the statement, "All that matters in the end is a 'happy healthy baby'"? What about a happy healthy mother who is not suffering from post partum depression brought about by unneccessary interventions and interruption to the natural process of mother/baby bonding because they were forced into a c-section when their induction failed to produce results, pitocin made them crazy and they begged for an epidural, and then ended up with a c-section when everything "failed to progress."?
By no means am I judging any of you, but I am trying to encourage you all to find your inner strength and birth through the pain.?
You were made for this.

Haven't seen the movie but I'm reading Sheila Kitzinger's book on Birth and motherhood and I couldn't agree more.

My birth plan essentially is birthing THROUGH the pain.?

disbride061103 · May 2009

JCM083009:
FutureHardings:
People have been doing this for a long time, yes. Women were very likely to die during labor as well.
Actually, the mortality rate in the US is higher than ever and higher than any other industrialized country. I'm not sure our interventions and C sections are really saving that many woman and babies.

I challenge you to prove this. I could easily name two dozen people on the 6 to 12 month board whose babies may not be here if they didn't have intervention, myself included. And that is off the top of my head. I'm sure that there are dozens more.

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