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Can my husband have at least a piece of the douchebag award?

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Re: Can my husband have at least a piece of the douchebag award?

  • msmichellehmsmichelleh
    imageoh-zysbaby:

    Ask HIM that...what would he do if someone talked to his daughter like that?

    This. When my husband was out of work (and even a bit at an old job he HATED), he was an ass. Total. Ass. This was a few years ago.

    At one point I told him I couldn't take it anymore. That I didn't deserve to feel like *** anymore, and that while I understood he was stressed, I was the one trying to help him. Then I told him what Ozy said. "What if someone was talking to YOUR daughter the way you are talking to me?" He of course had never thought of it that way, and was really only thinking of himself. Don't sit there in silence. I know it's hard when they are saying *** like this, but you need to let him know how YOU feel.

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  • mrsc720mrsc720

    imagesulfababy:
    Holy crap.  What a jerky thing to do.  I'm sorry. :(  He may be stressed, but that is no excuse for acting that way.

     

    This. I also second packing his bags and warning him of the nestie swarm heading to TX if he doesn't behave, apologize, and buy you something special.

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  • anniekhanniekh
    imageruthymusney:
    imageoh-zysbaby:

    You are NOT overreacting. I can ALMOST write off the FIRST stupid part as stress, but really what you've described is abuse. I hope this is a one and only fvck up and that he figures his shiit out QUICK.

    I would suggest NOT saying anything about taking the baby and going quite yet...because whether or not you are serious it will sound like an empty threat and probably make him angry. Make it clear to him quite calmly and matter-of-fact that his behavior was unacceptable, that you will not allow him to speak to you or anyone else like that again, and that you are not interested in excuses or apologies, just that it never happens again.

    If this continues, Ruthy, please reach out for help. That interaction sounds like the 6 years I spent with my daughters father. It goes way beyond douchebaggery. I'm sorry it happened and I hope everything works out!

    Thank you, my H thinks that verbal abuse consists of "get up slut and you'll do what the f*ck I tell you to" what he doesn't realize is that if thats what he "thinks" abuse is...he's awfully close to hitting home. 

    This isn't a one time occurance.  He calls me stupid alot and thinks it's okay I guess.  This shows you how f-ing rotten his family let him be as a child.  Almost like it was cute when he said things that any other parent would wash their childs mouth out for.  He talks to me like I'm 5 asks me "do you understand me!?" stuff like that... I have talked to him about it and I'm not sure what to do now....ugh....I hate trowing all of this on you ladies but I just don't know what else to do... I tell my sister everything...but this would kill her...

    Question for you - why are you going to do when he says something like this to you in front of your daughter... or one step further, when he says something like this TO your daughter?

    Set the boundaries very, very firmly now and if he so much as places a pinkie toe over them, get the eff out of there.  Seriously.  You are priming yourself AND your baby for a life of pure hell.

    I'm sorry if this sounds harsh... but I nearly made that mistake and thankfully escaped in time.

    No one, ever, deserves to be treated the way he treated you.

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