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So how do you feel about...

heathergirl67heathergirl67 member
in TTC After a Loss

TTCAL girls who are pregnant coming back to the board and chatting?

1.  Happy!  They're my friends and they deserve it!

2.  The same way I feel around pg friends.  I'm happy for them, but I don't exactly want to hang out with them.

3.  Bummed.  I get jealous and sad.

Or whatever your personal feelings on this are?  I love this board and I'm sure the gals on SAL are great, but if (no, when!) I do get pg again I want to know how ppl will feel about me poking my head in and saying hi.  Love ya ladies!

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Re: So how do you feel about...

  • HeidiseanHeidisean member
    I think it is great! There is no difference between that and myself being on this board with a pic of my dd who is 2 1/2 years old and then I had 2 mc's. So, if it wasn't liked or accepted then they would not accept people who had mc's after healthy babies either, right?
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  • Mrs.EmmaLouiseMrs.EmmaLouise member

    Number one.  You should make it a clicky poll, incase people feel #3, but dont want to say it. 

    Personally- I love it when they come and post, it keeps the board moving and fun.  Plus its nice to have the inspiration, that it could be me next.

    ***** TTCAL/Forever Buddy to Cour10e******
    -m/c at 11w2d due to partial molar 2008 -m/c #2 2009
    Beautiful daughter born February 2011
    image
    **Ultimate TTCALer 2009**

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • JacquiemarkJacquiemark
    Number #1. I love to see them come around and see how they are doing, it gives me some hope. I think it is really nice when they check in on us as well.
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  • texas77texas77 member
    honestly i have felt all three of the options.  it just depends on where i'm at emotionally.  i tend to feel happier for the girls that have posted here a lot and that i've gotten to know.  if someone just comes here to post a BFP and hasnt been participating in the board it gets on my nerves, BUT this is a public forum and anyone can post whatever they want. 
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  • xnbridexnbride member

    I just kind of want to chime in real quick because I never anticipated how awkward and isolative it would feel after I got my BFP.  There is this period in which you don't really know if you quite qualify as a SAL but you certainly aren't TTCAL but you don't know if this pregnancy is viable yet. Meanwhile most of the people who have been your supports are over here.  It is really hard to be caught in between and not knowing where to go. 

    I have been pregnant 3 times in the past 5 months and it seems like when you need the support the most (during week 4-7) it is hard to seek it out because I don't want to alienate others. Does that make sense? All in all I think it is just awkward for everyone involved and I wish it wasn't but it is. I have worn both hats and I think there is no perfect answer and I think it is different for everyone depending on where they are in the grieving process and in their cycle. 

    I don't think anyone ever anticipated how hard this process would be.  So I am glad to have found other women who are going through similar experiences and emotions. 

     

     

    image

    9 angels in heaven-3 in my arms and 1 in the NICU                                                                                                                                    
    Mono/di twin girls: Josephine born to heaven and Evangeline born Earthside at 25w

    image

    image

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  • Anna&MattAnna&Matt member
    #1!!! I think it's great when they come back in and say hi.
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  • ibisibis member
    xn - that was so well put. I didn't realize I would feel so weird about coming back here. I have been on TTCAL for four months and it feels odd to just walk away from all these cool people, but I don't want to be insensitive by hanging around. It is awkward. 
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  • lil_rhodylil_rhody member

    xnbride said it exactly right. I did come here during my previous pregnancy because I "knew" people here--but then I still felt funny answering questions about charting. It's hard, and it's the part that I'm dreading about TTC again, just that feeling of isolation when you can't talk about it but you're still so scared.

    People told me at the time they didn't mind, but it did still feel awkward.

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  • KK2004KK2004 member

    #1

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker M/C #1 - BFP 12/28/2008. Confirmed m/c at 6wks - blighted ovum on 1/9/2009. M/C #2 - BFP 6/16/2009. Confirmed m/c at 7wks - blighted ovum on 7/1/2009.
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  • heathergirl67heathergirl67 member
    imageMrs.EmmaLouise:

     You should make it a clicky poll, incase people feel #3, but dont want to say it. 

     

    I was thinking exactly the same thing.  Unfortunately I'm not savvy enough to know how to do that.  It's obviously too late now, but for the future:  Is it super easy?  Anyone feel inclined to let me know how to do it? 

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  • sweetsarahsmileysweetsarahsmiley
    1!
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