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2nd Trimester
Dads who do nothing
Would you put up with it? I cant STAND when i see a women doing all the work and the man acting helpless and clueless. Especially when both parents work and for some readon the woman is still the cleaner, cooker, diaper changer etc. Even if mom is not working I just dont get how it is justifiable for the man to not help because he is "the man" and I get equally upset at women who let them get away with it.
Luckily I have a DH who is not like this at all, but I feel bad for my friend and a few others i hear about.
Ugh..rant over
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Dads who do nothing
UGH, I am SOOO w/ you! It annoys me as well!
It should be equal IMO.
Matthew Kevin
7/31/83-7/20/11
Met 1/8/00
Engaged 4/21/06
Married 9/29/07
Two beautiful legacies: Noah Matthew (2 yrs) and Chloe Marcella (8 mos)
Day Three
I could not deal with that. My husband works and keeps our yard looking great and cooks about half the time and cleans house at least as much as I do. I really appreciate him. I know I would be very resentful and hateful if I had to do everything!
ha funny you should bring this up. My DH helps out tremendously and is supportive... his friends on the other hand.... SUCK.
We had a cookout this past weekend and I had been up since 7 am cleaning, doing laundry, preparing food and getting the house ready. One of his friends had the audacity to say that I had DH wrapped around my finger since being pregnant and have him do everything while I do nothing b/c I asked DH if he could man the grill....another one of his friends pipes up and asks DH if he offers to help to which he replies yes.. he does what needs to be done and helps as much as he can.
His friend goes on to say that's where he went wrong that he doesn't offer to help at all unless asked.
It's no wonder his wife is miserable with the 2 under 2 she has and I can't believe she puts up with him.
sorry now I went on a rant, but this has been eating at me since last weekend.
BFP #2 11/4/12 EDD 7/20/12 missed M/C 12/13/12 @8w5d D&C 12/21/12
DX 2/7/13 with an alloimmunity + for anti-paternal antibodies started Lovenox daily & BA
BFP 2/16/13 EDD 10/28/13
Oh that burns me up! And your husband's friend probably wonders why his wife is so resentful towards him - he probably blames that on her being a "typical woman" or whatever.
Reminds me of my coworker who got flowers from her boyfriend. Two of my male coworkers started talking about how they NEVER get flowers or gifts for their wives because they "don't want to spoil them." ASSES. I thanked them and told them that being around men like them made me appreciate my husband more. They laughed like they thought I was joking.
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. My best friend takes her 4 mo old to daycare super early so her DH can sleep later and go to work later. I was like, why don't you just have DH take her on his way to work so you don't have to leave for work so early/she doesn' thave to be at daycare so early and she was like "but DH likes to relax in the AM". Um WEIRD!
But what really gets me is when people say their DHs are "babysitting". Um no, they're not babysitting! You babysit for kids other than your own. You'd never hear someone says mommy was babysitting. That irks me. I want my DH to be just as much of a parent as I am.
ITA with this statement!
I am incredibly lucky and grateful that my DH helps out with everything. He doesn't mind changing diapers, and he actually likes doing dishes and laundry. In fact, he (jokingly) claims that I don't do those right so it's his job to do it right. Our DD has been having a hard time falling asleep at night the past week, so he's been going in to her room to talk to her until she falls asleep. He loves doing that, which is great because she only gets mad whenever I try doing the same thing. Such a daddy's little girl. h
It's 2009 and they need to start splitting the work. I had to train my hubby when i first moved in with him but it didnt take long for him to clean and do the laundry and now he complains about me being a slacker haha.
Since we both work we got a maid to come every 2 weeks (yay for us) but if i decide to stay home i will have to take over and probably learn how to sweep the floor again.
I totally feel for the mothers that have husbands that dont do anything, my SIL's husband is like that and it annoys me when i go over b/c i feel like slapping him to do something, anything, he doesnt even play w/ the boys or acknowledge the boys. such a shame.
My coworker and her husband have a 14 month old. Before they had a child together, he did nothing. So, I'm not sure why she expected anything from him after a child came into the picture...but anyway. He has yet to change a diaper or feed his own son a bottle. She has to beg him to keep an eye on him while she takes a shower. When she is finished, she finds that her son has completely filled his diaper and her husband didn't even notice.
He's such a jerk and I have never said anything to her, so I'm so glad this thread was started so I can vent without hurting her feelings.
I'm a SAHW so I do everything around the inside of the home. I wouldn't have it any other way. DH is still helpful though and picks up after himself.
Once the baby is born DH will be helping out A LOT more. He understands how much work a baby is and doesn't expect me to do everything. I do feel sorry for those women, especially working women, who are expected to do everything domestic and baby related but why let their husbands get away with it? Put your foot down and divide the responsibilities.
My DH and I have talked about this type of stuff. I think, the way things will turn out-since I will be home with our LO while he's at work, I will do a lot of the work as a whole. It'll probably just work out that way. But, he is so wonderful, it's not because he's a lazy ass. He's never afraid to make breakfast, wash dishes, fold laundry.. He's awesome!
When we went back to CA for Christmas we saw friends of ours. They have two kids, one that was just over a year old. The husband came home and never greeted his wife, but greeted his kids, she got dinner ready, fed the kids, fed him, and then had to try and eat herself with baby on her lap. This is where my DH and I took the baby so she could eat, but my DH was sooo mad. He was like "what kind of douche bag does that?!?"
I definitely see what you're saying!
Nate handles the majority of the outside, I handle the majority of the inside. He mows, I cook. I'll help weed flower beds & such when he's outside, or he'll help vacuum when I'm cleaning inside.
::shrugs:: It's just how we work. But he's also more than happy to help me clean the house or do the laundry, whether it's because I ask or because he volunteers.
I think it splits it all 50/50 at the end of the day.
We'll have to see how we divy up baby responsibilities when HJ gets here. He has more time in the mornings bc he gets ready faster, so I'm sure he'll take care of the babe in the mornings. Since he has a laborous job that leaves him exhausted at the end of the day, I'll take nighttime duty for baths & feeding. Something to that extent.
I have a helpful husband thank goodness. We pretty much split things and if the other needs help we help.
I have a friend though with a husband like this. She has to beg him to watch their 18 mo old so she can finish up dishes or what not and if she asks him for example to clean up his high chair after dinner he does a half ass job thus creating more work for her. It's not that he doesn't know how to clean a high chair he just thinks it's women's work. He's like that about a lot of things. He used to tell her when she was pregnant that she didn't need to read up on babies because he knew everything there was to raising them. Uh yeah okay. I just cringe when he opens his mouth.