Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Pot and Pregnancy...
Ouch... $5,000 fine?!
I absolutely hate smoke and just remove myself from situations where there is guaranteed to be some... yikes.
I understand how gross and frustrating it is to be subjected to other people's secondhand smoke (especially when pregant!) but I would probably have just moved myself.
I hope they weren't really charged that amount, that is pretty brutal.
In my bag: Canon 60D, 50mm 1.4, Tamron 28-75 2.8, 430exii
you have GOT to be kidding me. you went to a concert (kings of leon, not beethoven), knowing that there would likely be smoking of the cigarette and weed variety and then had people ejected for doing just that? after throwing things at them?
you remove YOURSELF from such a situation. my god, are you the church lady or something? team america world police?
i'm sure your baby is just fine, but damn.
http://i41.tinypic.com/111ov4j.jpg
2007-Sept 2008: TTC the old fashioned way
Sept 2008 - Jan 2009: Clomid 100mg
Feb 2009: 200mg Clomid = BFP! on March 20, 2009 - It's a BOY!
Nov 26th 2009: Aidan Michael, 20.5" 7lb12oz
Feb 2010: Start TTC again, the old fashioned way
Mar - June 2011: Clomid 100mg
July 2011: Unmedicated cycle = BFP! on August 29th, 2011
Nov 6th 2011: m/c due to subchorionic hematoma
Dec 2011: Start TTC again, unmedicated
February 12th, 2012: BFP! EDD 10/23/12
Mar 12th 2012: diagnosed as blighted ovum
Trying again..
DITTO.
Your kid is fine.
Seriously.
I'm going to Dave Matthews tonight. I'd be a fool to not expect people to be smoking all kinds of things.
well, i am the church lady and the lawnmower and i would've mowed their loser assses down.
rules are rules. they break the rules, they pay the price.
if they can afford pot, they can afford a good lawyer.
i wouldn't have gone to the concert but you did and that is your choice but i would've done the same thing.
worst scenarios with pot and drugs have taken place and the babies are fine so don't worry.
You did the right thing. I wish you could have gotten away from the pot smoke as well but that is hard. If it was bad I'm sure you would have gotten out.
I recently decided that I would like to carry a concealed paintball gun. This way I could just pop people with it. Speeding? Pow! Smoking near me? Two to the fancy jacket you are wearing. Generally being an idiot? Maybe one to the crotch. This would make it easy for other people to identify them as jerk wads as well. Everyone wins.
I'm sure this is hormones and I am not generally a violent person.
HOLY CRAP!
You are a special kind of freak - aren't you?
P.S. - if you are going to have your ass wound up that tight at a concert - you can ALWAYS sell your ticket outside.
I am definitely not the church lady, and I didn't ask for anyone to be ejected.
I would have gladly moved if I could have - the concert was sold out, and there were no other seats. I merely asked the security to request that they stop smoking the cigarettes (I didn't even mention the pot - as I didn't want anyone to get arrested), and I didn't know about the fine/ejection rule until after the concert was over and we were leaving. There was a sign posted at the exit/entrance. Also, my friend threw stuff at them and I told her she should stop.
Knowing that would you still say I was wrong to speak to security? If you think yes, why should they have more rights to do something which is (not only illegal but) inconsiderate when I paid the same amount for my tickets and have the same right to enjoy the show?
I can't believe you did this.
I doubt an hour or two around smoke would be detrimental to the baby's health.
But rules are rules so I don't think you should feel that bad for ratting them out. I've been to a lot of concerts and I don't recall people smoking cigarettes. You can't smoke inside anywhere in my area. No smoking in bars or restaurants.
Given that the venue was a smoke-free venue, you had every right to complain when they violated the rules. They were infringing upon the rights of everyone around them who had a reasonable expectation that they would not have been subjected to smoke at a smoke-free concert.
That being said, your baby is going to be fine. Unless you spend protracted periods of time around smokers on a regular basis, a little incidental second-hand smoke is not going to do any permanent damage.
you are bound to get flamey mcflamerson responses on here ....if you think you did the right thing, than go with that.
if you didn't than live and learn....personally, i used to work behind the scenes at concerts and they usually get a wrist slap and a smaller fine for 1st time offense....again. rules are rules.
ha! pregnant or not, i would've done the same thing. i'm paying money not to inhale fumes...if fumes were allowed, i would not go to the concert, but being that they aren't, those folks should know not to puff in my direction or i'd be busting them.
yes. your "right" to enjoy the show is all well and good, but if you want to be surrounded by nonsmoking safe drivers for the duration of your pregnancy you're going to have to take up residence in a retirement home or convent. you assume the risk of pot smoke and cigarette smoke when you go to a rock concert. there is nothing in the history of rock concerts that would lead any sane person to believe otherwise. ergo, if you don't want to be surrounded by the smoke, you sell your ticket. tough luck, but that's life.
enforcing the rules on everyone else around you only makes you uptight and freaked out. not to mention that before you so kindly reported the egregious smokers to security YOUR FRIEND THREW STUFF AT THEM. i don't like that one of my coworkers makes stinky-ass popcorn every afternoon, which is technically not allowed per our office rules, but i have yet to hurl pens and binder clips at her head. nor have i asked any of my friends to.
I don't think its right I should have to leave if I have paid and they are the ones doing something they shouldn't.
For the pot versus cigarettes thing - research shows the pot is less dangerous that cigarettes both first hand and second hand (and I didn't find the smell as offensive). These ppl were doing both and being obnoxious and rude to everyone around them. I am sure I wasn't the only one who said something.
You definitely did the right thing and I hope they got that fine!! They know there's no smoking indoors in Ont, and there are signs everywhere at the JLC with warnings! Way to go!
BTW do you live in London? I do! Hi!
The stick up your ass is far more detrimental to your child than a few hours with pot smokers.
Rules are rules, but anyone with half a brain knows that going to a concert, regardless of venue "rules," means smoking of all kinds. So sure, stand up for what you believe in, but own up to the fact that you knowingly put yourself in a position that you weren't favorable to.
geesus, the girl asked for feedback not poison!
why do some people have to be rude? uncalled for.
I'm not sure why, but the mental image of you actually doing this just sent me into a fit of giggles. I think you should go for it the next time she puts the pop-secret in the microwave, lol
ditto. and I can't really blame you for ratting them out, especially if you didn't know about the ejection rule and fines. too bad for them, maybe they'll quit.
Thanks - it is illegal and I doubt they got the fine, but that wasn't my intent. I just wanted them to ask them to stop. I didn't even know about the fine till after. No, I am in Toronto. But, hello just the same!
This. Sure, it's against the rules, and you had every right to complain. But what did you expect the environment was going to be like?
I bet you were a hall monitor in High School.
They had been asked twice before to by other people, or this is what I would have done. They just swore and at them and said they could do whatever they want b/c they paid to be there. I am sure that couple went and ratted them out long before me though.
It wasn't a surprise, and I shouldn't have gone, if it was an outdoor venue I wouldn't have minded as much but we were enclosed and I felt like there wasn't an alternative. I figured I'd get a good flaming.
Despite popular belief on here today - I do not have a stick up my ass, and I whole-heartedly admit that I shouldn't have gone. But it's too late now. I still think that given the circumstances I didn't do anything wrong (other than going in the first place).
Oh, I thought the kings of leon were at the JLC last night?
I don't know why anyone on here thinks the smokers deserve more consideration since it is illegal and they know it. Non-smokers shouldn't have to worry about whether they are going to get cancer if they go to a concert or a bar.
I wouldn't worry about the pot smoke so much, it wasn't right in your face and you're right it's less harmful.
lmao. I'll put $10 on that.
I never said I complained b/c it was illegal - I complained b/c it was bothering me/they were asked to stop by other people/we're jerks about it. I admit that's why I said something. You are right though, I shouldn't have gone.
You story just keeps coming out with more details doesn't it. lol!
I think what is uncalled for is this douche of a child who stamped her foot and got people thrown out of a concert after her friend threw popcorn at their heads. Uncalled for is freaking out over a few hours of second-hand smoke when I'm sure she also eats processed foods and/or things that might not be healthy for her or the baby. Uncalled for is the fact that this is most likely the tip of the iceberg for this idiot thinking that the world now revolves around her because she is pregnant.
This post only furthers my belief that there are lots of people out there whoput themselves in situations where they will definitely be offended JUST SO they can be offended.
What did you expect, going to a KOL concert? Smoke free venue or not, seriously. Come on, now. Have you ever been to a concert before? Clearly you have to know how this works.
And if you think that a couple hours of a few wafts of second hand smoke are going to damage your baby, well I hope you have a nice bubble erected in which to spend the rest of your pregnant days.
I bet you were a smoker
If a person is supposed to assume that anytime they go to a place where people would have liked to smoke, had it been legal, there would be smoke- then what the hell is the point in making the venue smoke-free in the first place? When I go to a smoke-free location, I expect there to be no smoking. Being PG hasn't changed this. There are plenty of people that enjoy concerts but don't want to be subjected to other people's secondhand smoke. The equitable answer is to enforce the smoking laws where they apply instead of expecting non-smokers to stop going to concerts in smoke-free concert halls.
No, at the ACC.
I don't know why ppl seem to think that they had more of a right to enjoy the concert then everyone else who was pissed off by it - but to each their own. There has also been a few girls who agree so its okay.
The pot was mostly in a different section (besides these same guys) and they were right in front of us (just a couple rows down).