NBR - Any1's husband work 2nd shift?

afg · April 2009

MH was laid off a few months ago and given the horrible horrible job market in this city he is having no luck finding a job.

He is starting a new part time (30-ish hours) job tonight! YAY but it is second shift which means he'll start work anywhere between 3-5pm...

I work 8:30 - 5:30pm so we will barely see each other on the days that we are both working....

anyone else in a similar situation? how does this work for your relationship?

I'm sure we'll adjust with time, plus it could be a benefit when the lo gets here, just wondering what others do.

TiffanyHenning · April 2009

My husband is a Chef so he works a lot of nights and weekends, and almost every holiday. I am not working right now, but before we had opposite schedules. We made an extra effort on his nights off to do fun stuff like going out to the movies or having dinner partys and stuff so we had exciting stuff to look forward to. I hope things work out for you!

I LUBBINS YOU! · April 2009

My hubby works every shift 6am-2pm for 7 days, then 2pm-10pm for 7 days and 10pm-6am for 7 days. He then only gets two days off in between each 7 days which only includes one weekend a month off.

Trust me...I know how difficult it is trying to spend quality time with your husband when he is on a chaotic schedule. My advice is to make the time you do have with him count. When you have time off on the weekends etc do something special together. I admit it is hard, but at least he has a job and we also make a point to communicate more now.

Hang in there...it's rough in the beginning, but you will find a way to get in time with him.

thailajo · April 2009

I was in this situation but I just got laid off so for now I"m working 9-12 and DH usually works 10-3, 9-6 or 3-8. With his schedule being so random and his working weekends we just have to really schedule our time off together as "our time"...and that means no phones, no email, only doing stuff together. It helps, but it can still be hard.

rmcrae · April 2009

It's rough. My husband sells cars and works every saturday and most nights until 8pm. It does stink.

Like everyone said, just make what you get count. I really only takes a few minutes a day to bond. You will miss doing a lot of stuff together, but weighed against the financial stress no income would provide, I'm sure you will come out on top!!!!

My husband has had this job ever since I've known him, so I guess in a way it is easier for me since this is all we have ever had.

It will be ok!

afg · April 2009

Thank you ladies, I appreciate your input. The good thing is that he will be working 5mins from home so at least he doesn't have a crazy commute on top of things.

diva741 · April 2009

I am in the same situation now. I work from 8:30 am- 5pm and Hubby works from 12am-830am. And most afternoons I am working my second job at BRU. So the time that we spend together is very brief. I agree with the PP that it is rough at first but you will find a to get time with him once you two get into the swing of things.

kp28 · April 2009

My husband & I are on the opposite schedule. He is a day walker and I work 2nds. Before that I worked nights (11p-7a) so I know how you feel. Hang in there. I love it when he waits up for me which can be rough cause he gets up at 6am. And my off days rotate-so most of the times we don't even have the same weekend off. Kudos to him for going out and getting a less desirable work hours job to bring in family money! It may be hard, but that is a man to be proud of!!!!

ksayles · April 2009

DH is a work-aholic. We both teach at the same school and then he has a part-time job at Guitar Center. In addition to that we have a recording studio and he is also a musician and a girls varsity soccer coach.

We don't get to spend a ton of time together, but we make the most of it. He will be cutting back once the baby comes.

tanya8 · April 2009

DH works nights, so he sleeps during the day when I am home. I work 2-7, so I get home in time to wake him up and have dinner with him. Sometimes, he has to work longer hours or 8am-8pm on weekends which sucks. He is in the military, so there is nothing we can do about it. At least it is a steady job with little chance of layoff. Don't get me wrong, though, it is tough for me to deal with, considering the last base we were at we both worked the same (regular) hours.

jhelly77 · April 2009

DH is a cop. He alternates shifts but ends up doing a LOT of evenings. We're used to it because we've never known anything different. We both do very well with our 'alone' time. I've found I'm MUCH more productive when he's not home. When the baby comes, it will be nice because he'll be home and awake while I'm sleeping so maybe I can get a little sleep at night.

afg · April 2009

kpaulson:
Kudos to him for going out and getting less desirable work hours job to bring in family money! It may be hard, but that is a man to be proud of!!!!

Thanks, I am very proud of him. And this money will make a big difference to us.

annibes · April 2009

DH teaches 3 nights a week, so kind of.

I worked 2nd shift for about a year when I worked in a hospital. It was shortly before we were married but after we had moved in together. It was tough at times, because I missed being able to eat dinner with him and we were on such different schedules, but it didn't hurt our relationship.?

In fact, I was worried when I quit my 2nd shift job just before we got married. I didn't want to discover years later that the saving grace of our relationship was our opposite work schedules, LOL. Turns out we get along even when we're both home all day, so it's all good.

Mrs.Turner21 · April 2009

My husband is in law enforcement and he works 2pm- 10pm and I work 7am -2pm. His days off are also during the week and mine are the weekend. We never see each other unless I stay up real late or when I get home on his days off. We just try and enjoy the time we have together. He's actually trying to get his shift changed, especially with the new baby.

aajfoster · April 2009

my husband is a cop too - we have had opposite schedules for the past 6 years. I work 8-5, he works 3:30 - 11:30. It really was hard to get used to at first, but we are so used to it now, its normal life for us. We both have our own things, but we make the most of the time we get together. It isn't an ideal lifestyle, but I get so excited for his days off. It's almost like we are dating again and get that giddy feeling when it get close to the end of the work day and I know he will be at home. The best benefit for us is that we will need very little daycare when the baby comes. BUT, finding a daycare that does it by the hour could be interesting!

dandi799 · April 2009

My husband works nights and weekends. I get home around 7pm and he comes home after I'm asleep. We usually see each other for a few minutes in the morning and one or two nights a week. It's tough, but we just try to plan at least a few hours of quality time in whenever we can. But, yeah, it's hard. There's so much to do and so many plans to be made and it's really hard when you never see each other.

RJHarmon · April 2009

My DH works a swing shift. He is either on day/2nd/or midnight and it changes every single week. It blows!!!

Crumb8609 · April 2009

My DH is a K-9 officer and works the 4-on-4-off schedule. He does 2 shifts of days (7am-6pm) and then 2 shifts of nights (6pm-5am). I work 8-5 so the night shift sucks but I at least get to see his sleeping face before I leave for work. We've been working with this schedule for almost 5 years now so we've gotten the hang of it. I know it will be an adjustment when the baby gets here but we'll make it work. You will too, it just takes some extra effort at times and a lot of communication. GL, I know you'll be fine.

tsoyster · April 2009

I know I'm creeping in on a second tri thread, but... My husband has worked second shift for almost two years. In fact, he's a police officer and his department is short, so for about three months he was working 2nd and 3rd shift four days a week and one day of just second shift. Now he's down to just two doubles a week. I work 9 to 5, so it is hard for us to make time for each other. One thing that's worked for us is we try to have lunch together whenever possible. Also, he is off on Tuesday and Wednesday evenings, so on those evenings, I try not to make plans or spend all my time in front of the TV. We use those nights to go grocery shopping or clean around the house, or even just take our dogs to the park. I love the weekends, but Tuesday and Wednesday are the highlight of my week. It has been hard though, and each couple is different.

yellowsnow · April 2009

aajfoster:

my husband is a cop too - we have had opposite schedules for the past 6 years. I work 8-5, he works 3:30 - 11:30. It really was hard to get used to at first, but we are so used to it now, its normal life for us. We both have our own things, but we make the most of the time we get together. It isn't an ideal lifestyle, but I get so excited for his days off. It's almost like we are dating again and get that giddy feeling when it get close to the end of the work day and I know he will be at home. The best benefit for us is that we will need very little daycare when the baby comes. BUT, finding a daycare that does it by the hour could be interesting!

Mine too! We used to work opposite shifts, I worked 8-5 and he worked 3pm to 2am. That was rough because I needed to sleep when he came home and he was gone when I came home. Thursday nights couldn't come fast enough and it felt like we were dating again. Now he's working 6pm to 6am and I was laid off so we have a lot of time together. I was used to having my three days to myself! I wouldn't trade it. I'm able to stay home until after the baby is here and then we'll be able to make it work out so I can go back to work part-time.

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