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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
queenie521
member
Someone please explain to me.......
queenie521
member
Why for some reason DH thinks it is NOT ok to let a stranger (aka daycare) let DS cry for 90 minutes but he somehow thinks it is ok for his parents to abandon him and let him cry ALL NIGHT LONG.
This makes absolutely NO sense to me.
DS was screaming for 3 hours straight last night.......I got all of maybe 3.5 hrs of sleep and am now sitting here at work completely disfunctional, I dont know what the answer is anymore and dont know for how much longer I can keep this up.
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Re: Someone please explain to me.......
Kelly Monaghan's 5K - 5/15/11 - 3rd Place in AG
Walk the Talk 5K - 5/18/11 - 31:12 PR
Ridley Run 3.1 - 4/14/12 - 1st race of the year, 32:45
I don't get it. If you were there why didn't you pick him up?? Unless you did and he was inconsolable?? In which case, I would've probably called the pedi last night.
Bubblegum Explosion
Yeah, that's a long time to cry. I think you should make your DH read some books on sleep training or different sleep techniques.
We have been havign sleep issues (him wakeing 4+ times a night) for over 1.5 months. Some nights he just wakes and goes right back down when I come in and give hiom his paci and pat him on the back, other nights he throws these tantrums (like last night) and NOTHING will work. We visited the pedi 2 weeks ago because I was about to rip my hair out and he gave him a thorough check and nothing was wrong.....he said it didnt even look like any teeth were surfacing yet. He had been waking up a little stuffed and the pedi was thinking allergies but DS got sick 2 days later so thats what I think that was. Pedi had no other explaination for us......
I dont know what to do anymore and like pp said, DH refuses to even help anymore because he thinks DS just needs to CIO.
is he teething or has he been like this for awhile?
ear infection?
constipated?
No, No, and No
Pedi checked....teeth are not surfacing
No ear infection, DS was sick and we went to the dr (green mucus) and pedi said there was slight fluid but no infection but he was put on antibiotis for the mucus and he just finished it 2 days ago
Pooping is not a problem for him...no constipation
it's possible CIO won't work for your son. Some babies just get more and more worked up from CIO.
We did Ferber at 4 months and it has worked to teach my daughter to put herself to sleep. But for the middle of the night wakings, she could cry forever. She simply gets herself so worked up she can't calm herself back down and go to sleep!
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
After starting to STTN at 5 weeks old - yes 5 WEEKS! - my DD won't sleep at all in her crib anymore. I'm being forced into co-sleeping against my will, but getting a full-night's sleep is more important.
Will he sleep if you bring him to bed with you?
He has both.....the pacifier is the only thing that soothes him but even that doesnt work sometimes. And I recently got him a lovie and that doesnt help either. I feel like I've tried EVERYTHING!
I know the pedi said he's not teething, but have you tried Tylenol? The teeth could be bothering him even though the pedi said his gums weren't swollen.
Have you started solids recently? My DD had a lot of stomach discomfort when she first started solids.
He might just be too young to sooth himself to sleep. Does he settle down if you pick him up? I know my DD would not have calmed down at that age unless I held her.
Have you tried reading Dr. Ferber's book? You need a definite strategy if you're going to let him CIO.
I feel for you -- I'm sure you must be frustrated -- the 4 month wakeful had me become a walking zombie!
are you Bfing? Maybe a dreamfeed would help?
What time does he go to bed?
Early bedtimes do wonders sometimes
Does he cry harder when you go in the room? When Mitch wakes up at night, I shut his door and sit in the living room. If he doesn't see me, he'll calm down and go back to sleep within 15min. If I go in and pat his back or lay him down he will scream for an hour.
Is he more hungry? Are you doing solids yet?
So sorry you're exhausted. Is there someone who can watch him outside of your house one day so you can get some rest?
Yes, when he has had these episodes in the past I've tried Tylenol...didnt work. I tried Mylicon....didnt work. I tried Orajel...didnt work.
DS has been on cereal before bed only since 4 months (another attempt by pedi to help him STTN with no luck).
When he has these kind of tantrums, just picking him up doesnt help either.......he still kicks and screams and arches his back.
I'm planning on buying the Freber book out of desperation, but I just dont think CIO is the solution for DS. I have been using the Baby Whisperer's PU/PD method for the past month but some nights it works, others it doesnt and even at that, it has not improved the number of times he wakes......he is waking 4 times a night on average.
I've tried dreamfeeding and this made not a single bit of difference.
He already goes to bed early..he is down between 7:30 and 8pm. I couldnt keep him up any longer if i tried and I'm not sure I could do earlier as we dont get home until 6pm.
He cries the same if I am in or out of the room.
He isnt really hungry (I do BF him once during the night) and I've been doing cereal before bed for 2 months.
Someone watches him 4 days a week, but I work, so I cant use that time to sleep.
Could it be late-onset colic? Someone on the board was talking about their DC having that. I think it started around 4 months.
I'm sorry you're going through this!
Ferber is NOT CIO. I highly recommend this book. My DS was still waking up multiple times at night at 11mths until we tried Ferber. Within 3 nights he was STTN and has never cried longer than 10 minutes at night.?
Kelly Monaghan's 5K - 5/15/11 - 3rd Place in AG
Walk the Talk 5K - 5/18/11 - 31:12 PR
Ridley Run 3.1 - 4/14/12 - 1st race of the year, 32:45
Have you tried a noise machine/crib soother? I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. DS went through a similar phase around this age and then suddenly started sleeping from 8pm-4am.... I hope things get better for you. *hugs*
p.s. Tell your DH to go do some research...
I thought colic was day and night. DS is a perfect angel...happiest baby during the day. This only happens at night.
I have a CD running at night when he wakes crying......and I've also tries the nature sounds (rain) option on the cd pplayer.........nothing has worked.
My DS did this until he was 9 months old! I think it was developmental for him...he just started being able to put himself back to sleep on his own in the last couple of weeks...maybe give it some more time. We did some CIO to get him to sleep but I've not really let him CIO in the middle of the night. Once DS gets screaming, he doesn't go back down without some help.
This sounds plausible. You mentioned he is kicking, screaming and arching his back. That sounds like pain to me.
7-30-8pm
it sounds like hes not ready for CIO or maybe never will. I just read Healthy sleep habits happy child and it gave me insight into sleep in children and how it works. I suggest it. Im sorry you are dealing with this. I think you should stop letting him CIO and soothe him--try it again in a month or so if you feel like it. Maybe you DH needs to go in when he cries and sooth him, maybe he smells you and just wants to comfort nurse.
If it were me I would bring him in my room in a cosleeper or something and deal with the waking fro a whlie while soothing him when he wakes. Tell Dh to research about methods before trying and that CIO should not equal neglecting to hear or tend to your baby.
Plus you pedi doesnt sound great with the idea that solids help sttn--theres no evidence to suggest they do. So I wouldnt bleive that hes not teething if thats what you pedi says,
can you try 7-7:30 for a start. DS was waking up every hour and a half at that age, when we switched to an early bed time (6:00) it worked wonders. I didn't think it would work as he wasn't really acting tired, but it did and it actually helped him sleep longer stretches at night. We slowly pushed his bedtime back 15 minutes at a time because I was getting absolutely no time with him during the week when he went down at 6. He now goes to bed at 7.
I can try a little earlier, but not by much cause i dont get home with him from daycare until 6pm
Everyone, she said she was soothing him. She tried to not pick him up & just sit by his crib & she also was picking him up to sooth him. So please stop telling her to not let him CIO. She wasn't letting him CIO. Her husband thinks they should be she doesn't & isn't.
With that said, I feel for you. I just posted below how DD was up last night crying off & on for over 3 hours. Nothing we did helped. We rocked, we walked her around, we took her for a drive (She did fall asleep but woke up once we got her back home), we gave her tylenol, we gave her a bottle, we gave her cold binkies. Nothing would calm this child down for more than 10 minutes. It was only the 1 night but I seriously hope it doesn't last. Taking her to the dr Saturday morning to rule an ear infection out.
I'd try co-sleeping in your case though. If DH is against it than maybe DH can hit the couch.
I don't think it has to be around-the-clock crying. I think crying for extended periods with no discernible cause can be considered colic.
How is sitting next to your child trying to soothe him without picking him up = neglect?!? Her DH suggested that they just let him CIO, but she didn't actually do it... geez.