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2nd time moms, while you're here

thatgirlangthatgirlang
in 2nd Trimester

I was thinking yesterday about how long it took for me to really feel confident and secure as a mom. I don't know if I am alone or not but... it kind of took me a while. I loved DS SO much from day one and tried very hard, but I felt like I had no idea what I was doing in the beginning. Those moments when DS was crying and I had NO IDEA why- I would get upset with myself that I couldn't figure out what he needed.

Then there's all of that advice that you get from everyone and their mom and what to do and not do and you try to filter it all, use some, ignore some, go with your instinct... but it's all so confusing.

I guess this is normal? It's truly a day by day process. DS is almost 3 and I have moments now where I am like, "Damn, I am a good mom! I know him, I get him, I know how he works."  LOL Took a while to feel that way!


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Re: 2nd time moms, while you're here

  • #3itwillbe#3itwillbe
    Totally agree!  As much as I love all the chapters I really LOVE the place I'm in now as a Mom:)
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  • taelirtaelir

    Oh man, those days where they cry for hours on end and you rip your hair out trying to figure out why...

    It totally takes a while to feel secure, and then once you get to that point they throw a curveball at you.  I think the first 3-4 years were the hardest (mine was a Terrible Three, not a Terrible Two) for me.  

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  • NewLermaNewLerma

    Please tell me you still get frustrated or I'm going to shoot myself!

    LOL I think my body cannot handle the hormones this time around because I've been so depressed lately that I just cry and cry. I keep hearing "This happens to everyone" but then I read this and hope...I have a Dr's appt Tue about getting on something more long term but right now she just gave me Ativan for the "bad days" but I hate taking it because it's a class D. 

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  • kristeljadekristeljade

    I agree.  I'm a wonderful mom.  I feel like I'll have a better time this time around b/c I won't be as scared in the beginning as I was with ds.  I know what I'm doing this time, and I'm more ready.  I know each child is different, but I'll be prepared for each little suprise this time.

    I also won't end up at the er with a baby with the sniffles as often.Smile

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  • thatgirlangthatgirlang
    imageNewLerma:

    Please tell me you still get frustrated or I'm going to shoot myself!  

    I think we're going to have moments where we get frustrated for many, many years! Like, for the rest of our lives. LOL


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  • mrsbhk22mrsbhk22 member

    I am so afraid to go back to that point!  Everyone says each child is different, so I am nervous that this one is going to be NOTHING like DS#1 (who I feel like I finally figured out).

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  • thatgirlangthatgirlang
    imagemrsbhk22:

    I am so afraid to go back to that point!  Everyone says each child is different, so I am nervous that this one is going to be NOTHING like DS#1 (who I feel like I finally figured out).

    I know what you mean! I spent the first several weeks of this pregnancy feeling that way. To the point where I WISHED the pregnancy to go by as slowly as possible. I still kind of feel that way. LOL. I am scared. But.... I still feel a lot more confident since I've had a newborn before and survived.


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  • MrsPreKMrsPreK

    Hmmmmm...that's my frustration right this instant!! LOL.

    DH is at work and DS has several hours before bedtime. He's super, super fussy and isn't hungry, LOL. 

    I wanna pull my hair out!!! And, I'm gonna have another one?? ::bangs head on desk::

    Good gravy!

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  • taelirtaelir
    imagethatgirlang:

    I know what you mean! I spent the first several weeks of this pregnancy feeling that way. To the point where I WISHED the pregnancy to go by as slowly as possible. I still kind of feel that way. LOL. I am scared. But.... I still feel a lot more confident since I've had a newborn before and survived.

    Ahhh yes, the "OMG I'm going to break the baby" phase.

    I am so glad you only go through that phase once :)

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  • LoveEeyoreLoveEeyore member
    I definitely had my worries about 'breaking the baby" but DD was soooo easy- we were cocky, I think b/c it was such an easy phase.  i think her ability to express freewill has been harder!  I'm actually afraid that I will have all that insecurity because, well, there's 2 this time, which doubles my chances of having a more challenging baby.  With DD, she cried if she needed a clean diaper or the boob.  NB poop announces itself, so there was very little guesswork with her. 
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