re: FFFC & SAHM

brandonsfuturewife07 · March 2009

i just have to say..

totty, i love ya, but i SAHM & i do spend a lot of time with my son and am still able to get on here. every morning, after he eats breakfast, he goes in his jumper, i make myself coffee and get on here.

it's my morning time to "myself." i would rather be on here than watching daytime tv.

i take him to work with me, and my H works crazy hours so i barely get a break. he's right next to me, so i can still talk to him and interact with him. i just post in between.

it's not that hard.

Krissi~n~Justin · March 2009

sometimes I feel guilty though being on here when I could be on the floor playing with her more, but I need a break sometimes!

*blondiem* · March 2009

C is napping right now, and I am working/nesting. But, when he is up, I also put him in the jumperoo right next to me. I think it's important that he has independent play, and it gives me an opportunity to get some work done on my day away from the office. That isn't to say that he is always in the jumperoo either. We have our fun time too. Like when he wakes up, we are going for a long walk.

I think SAHM's do get a lot of flack for being on these boards/internet/whatever. However, there are SOME that are on here A LOT.

ABMcKinney · March 2009

I think what Totty is trying to say is that she doesn't WANT to be on here when she could be spending time with her son. I could very easily nest from home while also interacting with Robbie... but I don't want to. I want to give him and my husband all my attention because that is what makes me happy. Robbie and I go places and plan play dates and practice his skills and read books. I want to devote my attention to that, not split it.

vanillacourage · March 2009

I've tried to Nest before when my son was in the same room. Unless he was drugged or connected to the floor with duct tape, it wasn't going to happen.

Toosdai · March 2009

You also aren't a GOLD poster, though and aren't you more active at night?

It's not possible to be gold poster active on a message board - multiple boards - and be 'present' for your child. If you child is asleep, sure but if it is awake, it cannot be done.

krismtg · March 2009

I agree. I am on here when he is napping and when he is doing independent play. I spend a lot of time talking to him and playing with him too. I used to entertain him every second of every day and it ended up just overwhelming him and making him very cranky. Also I find that if I stare at him the whole time during floor play he doesn't try anything new. Kind of like bowling, you only do well when no one is paying attention. I think that the independent time will give him an opportunity to explore his surroundings.

VTbride05 · March 2009

(I didnt read the post that started this debate)..... I stay at home and am only on here if Henry is napping or playing by himself. I play with him most of the day but I really want him to play by himself too. It is important for kids to play independently and not need constant interaction with another person. (I have a 7 year old niece who has no idea how to play by herself which is really hard for my sister.)

Erin Mary Ackerman · March 2009

Toosdai:

You also aren't a GOLD poster, though and aren't you more active at night?

It's not possible to be gold poster active on a message board - multiple boards - and be 'present' for your child. If you child is asleep, sure but if it is awake, it cannot be done.

unless, say, you cheated your way to gold status

hypothetically

for instance

MrsTotty · March 2009

WOAH WOAH WOAH ... my post was apparently taken COMPLETELY out of context. I did NOT mean that I think SAHMs are sitting around neglecting their kiddos while they're on the nest ...not at all.

My point was to the people who come here to release dramaz of all sorts about things that have NOTHING to do with nest dealings onto this board because the nest seems to be their whole life and they crave the attention. I'm on the nest a lot when I have a day off, and if I was a SAHM I'm sure I would be as well. My point was about those people (working OR SAHMs) that would rather work on their interwebz social character and reputation regardless of how long they are on here, or what their kids are doing.

BW - please please please do not think that I am slamming SAHMs who choose to Nest in general. I did not mean to incinuate that at all.

Toosdai · March 2009

BrahimBride:
unless, say, you cheated your way to gold status
hypothetically

for instance

You did not. LOL

vanillacourage · March 2009

Who cheated? I didn't - I earned mine the old-fashioned way (by being a horrible employee).

Buckets of Moonbeams · March 2009

I'm SAH and I'm on here throughout the day: when I pump, when Kate naps, after she's in bed at night. It's not rocket science.

Nobody needs a break from their baby more than SAHMs. Really.

eowynmn · March 2009

Age plays a part too.

5-6 month olds will sit in the jumparoo. 10 month olds. not so much. They are really into getting into EVERYTHING, crawling everywhere, and have seperation anxiety so you can't even be in the other room. My kid refuses to be in the jumper, pack and play, or exersaucer...so there really is no way to nest or do a whole lot while he's awake. And while he sleeps I'm going to be needing to do other things like cleaning and cooking and crap most of the time. (He's at daycare today though because I had a colp this morning and going on a daydate with my husband soon-yay!) But yeah I have no idea how moms of 9-15 month olds can sit online all day if they are SAHM's. It's just not really possible.

Toosdai · March 2009

eowynmn:

Age plays a part too.

5-6 month olds will sit in the jumparoo. 10 month olds. not so much. They are really into getting into EVERYTHING, crawling everywhere, and have seperation anxiety so you can't even be in the other room. My kid refuses to be in the jumper, pack and play, or exersaucer...so there really is no way to nest or do a whole lot while he's awake. And while he sleeps I'm going to be needing to do other things like cleaning and cooking and crap most of the time. (He's at daycare today though because I had a colp this morning and going on a daydate with my husband soon-yay!) But yeah I have no idea how moms of 9-15 month olds can sit online all day if they are SAHM's. It's just not really possible.

Perhaps your shady BFF can shed some light on how she does it?

Uh-huh....

ABMcKinney · March 2009

I WISH my kid had some seperation anxiety. He could care less if we leave the room! Kind of makes me feel crappy

Erin Mary Ackerman · March 2009

Toosdai:
BrahimBride:
unless, say, you cheated your way to gold status
hypothetically

for instance

You did not. LOL

I did. I own that. I'm way to busy harrassing preschools to get DD in

Erin Mary Ackerman · March 2009

MrsTotty:

WOAH WOAH WOAH ... my post was apparently taken COMPLETELY out of context. I did NOT mean that I think SAHMs are sitting around neglecting their kiddos while they're on the nest ...not at all.

My point was to the people who come here to release dramaz of all sorts about things that have NOTHING to do with nest dealings onto this board because the nest seems to be their whole life and they crave the attention. I'm on the nest a lot when I have a day off, and if I was a SAHM I'm sure I would be as well. My point was about those people (working OR SAHMs) that would rather work on their interwebz social character and reputation regardless of how long they are on here, or what their kids are doing.

BW - please please please do not think that I am slamming SAHMs who choose to Nest in general. I did not mean to incinuate that at all.

Is this directed my way about yesterday?

jenifairies · March 2009

Buckets of Moonbeams:

I'm SAH and I'm on here throughout the day: when I pump, when Kate naps, after she's in bed at night. It's not rocket science.

Nobody needs a break from their baby more than SAHMs. Really.

ditto. Other than the pump part. This is some of my "me" time and some of the only adult interaction I get a lot of days. My DD has been crawling/walking for a while now, and she would rather run around than sit and read books, so she gets to just play a lot.

stephm0188 · March 2009

Sure it's possible.

Adam is napping now. His nap time has always been my time for me. Yep, there's laundry up there to be folded and dishes to put away, but I can do that when he's awake and make a game out of it. (This plate is red. This bowl is green.)

And when he's awake I dump a pile of Puffs on the floor and he goes to town. Now tha5t's giving 110%!

eowynmn · March 2009

Toosdai:
Perhaps your shady BFF can shed some light on how she does it?

Uh-huh....

My BFF doesn't nest. Her kids are like 10-18 yrs old.

If you are talking about hippy, I don't think she's been online as much but then again maybe i'm different. I've never been very good at multitasking when I'm with my son. I usually do have to give him 100% because I can't figure out how to do both at once.

Mrs.State746 · March 2009

I SAH as well, and am on here mainly when DS is napping, in bed for the night or spending time with his Daddy.

CreamPuff06 · March 2009

BrahimBride:

Is this directed my way about yesterday?

I think I can speak for Totty and say that NO, that is not the case at ALL.

MrsTotty · March 2009

No Brahim - your post was thoughtfully written and well stated. I did not think that it was AWey at all. I'm glad you posted it.

libby73 · March 2009

eowynmn:
Age plays a part too.

5-6 month olds will sit in the jumparoo. 10 month olds. not so much. They are really into getting into EVERYTHING, crawling everywhere, and have seperation anxiety so you can't even be in the other room. My kid refuses to be in the jumper, pack and play, or exersaucer...so there really is no way to nest or do a whole lot while he's awake. And while he sleeps I'm going to be needing to do other things like cleaning and cooking and crap most of the time. (He's at daycare today though because I had a colp this morning and going on a daydate with my husband soon-yay!) But yeah I have no idea how moms of 9-15 month olds can sit online all day if they are SAHM's. It's just not really possible.

Yes

brandonsfuturewife07 · March 2009

MrsTotty:
No Brahim - your post was thoughtfully written and well stated. I did not think that it was AWey at all. I'm glad you posted it.

ditto this x1,000,000

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