Does the first grandchild always determine what the grandparents are called?

kaustin · March 2009

So, this baby will be DH's parents third grandchild. His brother has a two and a half year old and a newborn. The two and a half year old calls DH's parents poppy and maw. I personally don't like these nicknames at all but I am wondering if my children will call them that as well(no offense if someone else likes these names). If I just refer to them in our house as grandpa ___ and grandma ___ is that what my children will call them? What is it like in your families?

Pennylane824 · March 2009

I am having the first and I know it was a big deal for my parents to decide on what they wanted to be called and me and my sisters all love it.

That being said, I also think they child will probably end up saying whatever they can eventually pronounce... so it may get slightly skewed throughout the years....... or if my sisters happen to marry a man whose parents are already going by similar names.

suscq · March 2009

The first grandchild has determined it in our family and DH's

mavilabride · March 2009

I never really thought about that till now but can totally see that happening (the 1st grandchild setting the tone).

I don't have a single cousin that calls my grandparents by a different name. We all call my mom's parents mama and papa. And on my dad's side it's grandma and grandpa (yeah original LOL). I don't think anyone calls them by anything else.

Interesting.

FrickandFrack · March 2009

I think they should be called whatever you and your children are comfortable calling them.

MrsBeckO · March 2009

It would be easier, I imagine, to have all the grandkids refer to the g-parents by the same name.. so I think naturally the first grandchild kinda takes over that process.?

In our case, we have the 3rd g-child on my side and the 5th on my DH's side. I am so used to hearing "nona" & "grampa" and "paw-paw/na-na" that I can't imagine trying to switch it up now. We'll just stick with what was established years ago. ??

Mrs.Teddy · March 2009

I don't know! This is a first grandchild for both sides. His parents will be Lola & Lolo, which is filipino for grandma & grandpa. My mom will be Grandma Debbie, she wants to go by first name. I haven't talked to my dad about it yet but his girlfriend has said several times she is going ot be a grandma & I am not comfortable with my child calling her that, she can be anything but Grandma, my mom is grandma.

gna*b*a*ledford · March 2009

My sisters first kid called my mom YaYa and my dad Pa... my sisters second kid followed the first and does the same... I am fine w/ those names... my sister in law has a lil girl that calls her Gpa - Papa and Gma - grandma..and im fine w/ those as well.. but my parents nor his parents are stuck on being called anything... They left it up to their gkids to call them whatever came out first!

jexxie · March 2009

my boyfriend always called his grandma "grandma." his younger cousins (and me) call her "G."

i called my grandma "Babci." my mother is having trouble with this because my "Babci" just passed away over the summer and to take the name seems weird.

cedens · March 2009

i am having the first~ so i am not sure how it will work but in your situation, i would say it doesn't matter if it's different than what other grandchildren call the grandparents~ go ahead and call them grandpa and grandma __ then!

AliciaSpring · March 2009

My parents are Tutu and Papa, DH's mother will probably just be grandma. Tutu is Hawaiian for grandma well Tutu Wahine

mfransdell · March 2009

This will be the 1st grandbaby on both sides, my MIL and mom are still debating what they would like to be called. My SIL has decided she wants to go by "Aunt Pretty" though. Ugh.

edwins_girl · March 2009

On both sides of my family the first grandchild did dictate what all the kids called the grandparents. With my mom and dad and my SIL's parents (brother's wife) we all taught the kids to call them what we wanted them to be called. However, I think if you don't like what the grandparents are being called, teach your kids to call them something else.

julygal · March 2009

My sister's DD was the first grandbaby for my parents, and she called my dad "Papa" even though my sister always called him grandpa. No other grandkid picked that up, including my niece's sibling. My niece started calling him grandpa about the time she turned 4. My DD born 3 years later and living in a different state independently starting calling my dad "Baba" which eventually morphed into "Papa", and again we always refer to him as grandpa. I think kids call them what they want in the beginning and then ultimately pick up on what others refer to the person as and use that.

averyhappygirl · March 2009

It was a little different for me but here's what we did:

I called my father's father grandpa and call his wife grandma (first name) - now that I'm older I just call her grandma

I called my father's mother grandma and her husband grandpa (first name)

I call my mother's parents Grandma and grandmpa on the farm (the owned a farm when I was a kid) - now I just call them grandma/grandpa

I'm the 5th oldest grandchild and although this is what my sisters call them too, all of the other grandchildern call them something different including the older ones.

NvmbrBride · March 2009

My kids were my parents 7th, 8th and 9th grandkid so their names were pretty well established and normal to me (gramie and papa as determined by what my first neice called them). My IL's were a little different - my FIL was already Pop-pop by his existing 3 grandchildren. My 1st was MIL's 1st true grandchildren (the others are her step-grandchildren and they called her Grandma Denise). I was fine with that but she wanted to be called Mom-Mom. I had never heard that but wasn't really liking it (DH agreed) so we told her no. She started off as Grandma but then my son pronounced it Mee-ma and she loved it. I wasn't too crazy about it but she called herself it, DS couldn't pronounce it any other way and it just stuck. Now I'm used to it. I'd have to say, if it exists - it probably will stay that way and eventually you'll get used to it.

DarcyLongfellow · March 2009

I think it depends on the family.

My children will be the only grandchildren on my side and the first on DH's side. I don't plan to make a stink and insist that my BIL's future kids call their grandparents by the same names my kids use.

Also, I was the first grandchild on both sides growing up. I have tons of cousins on both sides, and NONE of them used the same names for the grandparents that I used! I was always kind of annoyed by that, but only because I was a bratty little kid. I don't think any of the adults ever thought about it!

Teddyswife · March 2009

Since I grew up in a traditional Italian family, DS will refer to my parents as Nonna and Nonno (grandma and grandpa in Italian)

DH grew up in a traditional Greek family, so MIL and FIL will be Yia Yia and Pappou (grandma and grandpa in Greek)

.completely.amazing.love. · March 2009

I was the first grandchild on both my mom's and stepdad's side. My grandparents on my mom's side are Mimi and Papap. ALL of the grandchildren call them that. My grandparents on my stepdad's side are Ma-Maw and Papa to my siblings and I but my cousins don't call them that so I guess it just all depends.

liongish119 · March 2009

Everyone (even my friends) call my Grandma "Grandma" so my Mom doesn't want to be called that. I told her she could pick her own (its her first grandchild) and she chose Granny FirstName.

My MIL is Grandma to her other grandkids so that's probably what she'll be for mine. DH's Grandpa, who we are very close to, is formal: he likes to be called Grandfather LastName.

DH's dad is not in the picture, so DD will probably call my Dad Grandpa.

johnsoar · March 2009

no way!

My parents are grandma and papa to my nephews. DH thinks of papa as your dad so he said our kids whould call him grandpa.

My ILs are calle me-ma and be-ba by DH's nephew. There is no way my kids are calling them that!

sam19 · March 2009

My children will call their grandparents by grandpa and grandma. My Niece calls her grandpa, pawpaw, and that just really annoys me for some reason. H also hates little nicknames for grandparents.

andijane · March 2009

I am the oldest grandchild on both sides and my grandparents decided what they wanted to be called-My Mom's Mom is Granny (or Ganny now to my niece) and her husband is Papaw. My mom's dad is just Grandpa. My dad's dad and step mom are just Grandpa and Grandma (my dad's mom was Grandma or Granny as well-she passed last October). My Mom goes by Gammy and my Dad by Gampy to my neice. I like them all and so I am sure that is what my kids will call them as well. If they pick it out there won't be any complaints. I don't care what my children call them as long as they do it respectfully and with love. Good luck!

DanielsWife · March 2009

Not always. ?DH has always called his Grandmothers "Grandma _____" (first name in the blank), just calling them Grandma in person - I did the same, except with last names. ?However, DH's cousins call their grandmother "mamaw," and my cousins have called our grandparents "mamaw," "memaw," or "pappaw." ?So, I don't think all the grandkids always call the grandparents the same thing.

I think our kid will just stick to Grandma _____ and Grandpa ______ for each side - and this kid is the only grandkid on both sides - we're only kids!?

myantonia · March 2009

Not at all! In my family growing up there were three sets of cousins that all called my grandparents different things. My brother and I called them Grandmother and Grandfather. My uncle's kids called them Nana and Bauba. My Aunt's kids called them Grandma and Grandpa. We never thought it was weird until my brother and I started having kids and my parents decided on their names. They were very certain of what they did and didn't want to be called so we will all go with the same thing.

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