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Babies on the Brain
vent - wedding vs TTC drama
I'm in a wedding at the end of July. ?It's going to be really expensive and inconvenient to get to, but we've known about it for more than 2 years. ?One of the bridesmaids just backed out claiming money reasons. ?She wasn't too polite about it and I never liked her, so I was pretty irritated.
The bride just got on gchat to tell me that the ex-BM is apparently really worried that her husband is going to get laid off and they're freaking out about money. ?Ok, so I understand a little more now. ?Then the bride gets all pissed because they're still TTC and have money for that, but not for her wedding. ?
Um, SORRY. ?It's their choice, and I would pick having a baby over going to your wedding, too! ?You do not get to be pissed off about that.
I love my friend and she's usually so level-headed and drama-free, but between not understanding that her wedding is really expensive and inconvenient, then getting pissed about somebody's TTC plans not being convenient for her, I am officially irritated.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: vent - wedding vs TTC drama
Their plans to TTC are really none of her business. They could have been planning for this, and saving for their TTC needs - which do not include her wedding!
Your friend sounds like she's on a power trip and needs to be reasoned with. Their personal life is just that - theirs.
Weddings make people go nuts.
That sucks, but people seem to lose their heads about wedding stuff like this.
My sister is engaged and planning a destination wedding (destination TBA, possibly India) for Oct 2010. I'll go no matter what, but depending on where it is, DH and the baby might not go (i.e. I'm not taking my baby to India). I'm a little worried that she'll be hurt if we don't all go, but that's life.
*She is currently in vet school, so that is why there aren't any plans in place yet.
TTC#1 Chart
TTC#2 Chart
IUI #1 - #4 (repronex trigger) = BFN
IUI#5 on 10/28/2008 ** BFP 11/10/08 ** EDD 07/21/09 *** It's a GIRL (07/14/09)
med/treatment free BFP 06/28/10. EDD 03/05/11 *** GIRL #2 (02/23/11)
beta#1 @ 17dpo = 1296 .... beta#2 @ 19dpo = 3034
it's the Bug and Baby Belle!
I probably shouldn't be, but I am just so surprised because she is such a laid-back person. ?No signs of bridezilla so far, but when it comes to this one girl and ttc, she is just way out of line. ?
Fortunately she is being normal in most other ways....I think that having babies is just not on her radar yet and she doesn't get how inappropriate it is for her to try to be involved.
Exactly. ?I don't really think it's even a trade-off. ?"I'll hold off TTC a few months so I can go to your wedding." ?That would be insane even if it made any sense, which it doesn't.
BTW, this wedding is going to cost me THOUSANDS.?
THOUSANDS?!?! wtf! You can't get expect people to put out that much money for ONE day that isn't even special for them!
"You're gonna miss this You're gonna want this back You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast..."
Someday this bride will remember that she flipped out in this way, and be embarrassed about it. Punishment enough.
BTW, good for the ex-BM who set boundaries for herself and then honored them.?
?
Fortunately I don't think she said anything to the exBM, and I'm not really planning on intervening unless I have to, but I'm definitely not being as supportive as I was. ?I don't like the exBM much, so I was happy to trash her like the good MoH that I am. ?Now not so much. ?
Love the line about "Having the wedding here was important, your trade-off is...." ?Thanks for that one!
And yeah, thousands. ?The wedding is out of the country, 2 hours from the closest airport, and the most affordable hotels are 45 minutes away. ?I will have a newborn so I booked a suite for me, DH, DS, and the in-laws (who are coming to take care of DS) that is close by for $280 a night. ?Plus food, dress, car rental....do I get them a gift at that point?
Helllllllll noooooo!
that is awful. sounds like your bride-friend is jealous that your other-friend *might* have a baby before her. Some people are so stupid like that.
My husband's aunt told him that he "better not" propose to me and we "better not" get married before her and her fiance/husband. Turns out we didn't (we got engaged a few months after them and married a few months after them) but it surely wasn't because of them!
I don't know, I think if she's known about it for two years, and she's a bridesmaid its a pretty crappy thing to do. I understand about the money, but if you have had two years to save for the wedding (and agreed to be in it, knowing the costs) then make it work (losing the job, aside - that seems legit)
It might not be so much that she's pissed about her TTC plans, but pissed that she's known about the wedding (and expenses) for a long time and is backing out at the last minute. i would be.