Does DC see your parents more than ILs?

TamTam624 · January 2009

My ILs live about 20 m inutes from us and my parents live 5 minutes max from us. My Mom watches DS everyday while I work and sees him all the time on the weekend we attend church together. I tried many weekends to go to ILs on Saturday and MIL is always to busy.

Part of the issue is second hand smoke and that we do not want DS around it and ILs agreed to no smoking when we are there and I feel like they push me out so they can smoke.

At first I felt bad about ILs not seeing DS but they never want to come over and always have excuses when we try to go there so, I guess that is just how it is going to be, I do feel bad for DH because I see it hurts him.

mandyclaire579 · January 2009

Yes, DS sees my folks more. But ILs live in New Mexico and my mom takes care of him every Tuesday. I don't mind. I think secretly I want him to like my parents more than ILs....Is that weird? I mean, I was closer to my mom's parents....

ohwhattheheck · January 2009

wow, I could have almost written this. you know what though? I'm GLAD she doesn't see my ILs. That is not a good situation.

tmp-581032062508552 · January 2009

by far...my parents see him almost double of what the IL's see him. I feel bad, but that's just how it is. My parents are willing to drive to our house, ILs aren't. Sorry, but when it is 20 below out, I'm not coming to you.

betsnup · January 2009

It's actually the other way around for us. DS sees MIL weekly because she watches him while I work. Meanwhile, my mother and my father and stepmother live about 3 hours away and my mother has only seen him twice since he was born, and my dad and stepmom have only seen him once (this weekend will be their second time). It definitely is sad for me that my mother doesn't try harder to see him, but at the same time, we have made it clear we aren't traveling up to see her yet because we'd have to stay in a hotel because she smokes.

laur1120 · January 2009

Yep! And both of our parents are 9 hours away from us. My mom and dad just makes more of an effort to come out even when we didn't have DD. My MIL is making more of an effort now so we'll see if she keeps that up.

AndysKandi · January 2009

Yes, even though they live 1 hr 45 min from us, and IL's live 1 hour from us. And IL's live 4 hours from SIL yet see her kids more than ours. Hmm.

Sorry had a mini vent there.

Kiwibride18 · January 2009

My MIL has yet to meet DS. To her credit she doesn't live in the US....but it is bugging me a bit b/c she visits her daughter's kids all the time.

Lucky_Dragonfly · January 2009

My IL watch DS every Thursday. My mom saw DS for 45mins the day he was born and hasn;t seen him since other then when I decide to send her pictures. She hasn;t made any attempts to want to see him and I have made offers. What a biotch.

octmrsf · January 2009

Yes, and the weird thing is that my mother lives 3 hours away while my IL's live 20 minutes away. Go figure.

KaitlynDC6 · January 2009

Mine definitely do right now. I think it's mostly because I'm off work and they are retired. They live 10 minutes from me, so dd and I go over there for a change of scenery a couple times a week.

My IL's also live 10 min. away, but I think in many situations (def. not all), it's natural that the mother's parents are going to see their grandchild more because a daughter is more likely to want to visit with her parents. I don't think that communicates exactly what I meant, but hopefully it makes some sense. Obviously, this is not true for everyone, and many are in the opposite situation...

olivejuice127 · January 2009

I feel like it s a little bit more natural for DC to see my parents more than ILs I know that sounds dumb but DH is always working on the weekends and it is easier for me to be direct to my folks watching her, rather than my MIL. Not that I dont like them. It's just easier and more comfortable to take her to my parents then try to go through all the mindless chit chat of dropping DD off at ILs house. I just feel like daughters are going to have a better bond with their mothers and be around them more rather than DIL and MIL. I dont know if im explaining that right.

ElizC · January 2009

My mom sees DS way more. MIL is always to busy for him, even we drive 2 hours to see them. She also never has time to come see us or meet us in between. Yet she was the first one to rush to the hospital when I was having DS. SInce SIL has a baby a month older than DS she gets her baby fix from him and couldn't give a crap about DS. SIL and her DS live with MIL. I feel so bad for DS since I don't think his grandparents will every make the effort to see him. I feel like I am the only one who is trying in the relationship. Sorry for the vent, but I have crying about everythign with IL's all day.

KMR816 · January 2009

My parents see my DS WAY more than ILs. ?My ILs haven't been to see him since we've been home. ?They love him...but they aren't the kind to come and see any grandkids...my SIL takes them to see them. ?MIL lives about 20 minutes away. ?FIL lives about 5 minutes away. ?My parents live about 15 minutes away. ?My dad has been by once...and my mom would be here every day if she hadn't been sick. ?She will be the one keeping him when I go back to work.

My family is MUCH-more family oriented than ILs about everything. ?(Like...they weren't even going to have anything for Thanksgiving...DH got everything together and we had it at our house...a 8 month-preggo who doesn't cook cooking Thanksgiving dinner! ?lol...an experience I will never forget)...so it isn't just the baby.?

Ljd425 · January 2009

This post makes me so sad because I always envisioned my children being so close to my parents, maybe because I was so close with my maternal grandparents. I also feel like it is more natural for them to be a little bit closer with the mom's parents, but I guess things don't always work out as you hope for. I had to move away when I got married and so my parents live 2 hours away and in-laws live UPSTAIRS..lol. We are temporarily living in their basement (converted to apartment). But it stinks..I visit my parents alot, just because I wanna go home and they miss her so much. They are actually visiting us this weekend, but it still isn't the same. I am doing what I can to keep them in her life as much as possible via webcam, phone, and visits.

I know this is bad, but I recently heard that my inlaws may be moving farther away and am secretly hoping and wanting them to. I see them just about every stinking day!!

candreco · January 2009

My parents see DD more often, since they live about 20 min away. Usually on Sundays, and maybe one or two more times during the week. ILs live about three hours away, and make the drive here about once a month, generally only staying for the day or overnight and leaving early the next morning.

RoxxiJazz · January 2009

Yes, she sees mine more. MIL lives far and won't drive out here. We've only gone out there. And when I go back to work, my mom will be watching dd.

Echowysp · January 2009

Nope, he sees my ILs more. But they have a close-knit family, so we go visit a lot more.

futuremrstarter · January 2009

DS sees my parents more. DS's parents live an hour and a half away from us (thank God). My parents only live thirty minutes away. I'm sure they would like to see him more but I'm fine with it the way it is. I can't stand my IL's. They are rude and annoying-they seriously grate on my nerves.

Tahiti35 · January 2009

Yes! ILs only see them when we bring them to them, they live about 45 mins away. I can count on one hand how many times MIL has seen them. My parents live 3 hours away and have seen them and spent much more time with them. It will always bother me, it bothers my husband too but he wont say anything.... and I am definitely not saying anything!

stina022 · January 2009

ILs see DS more. They live a little closer and always have get togethers. My parents hardly come over because it seems like they expect us to come to them. My parents practically raise my 2 year old nephew, so they are usually busy with him.

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