Wow...how do you do it?

Accounting Chick

DH and I are currently TTC.  I'm in the process of getting my professional designation.  I know I won't be able to be a SAHM, and chances are DH won't be able to be a SAHD as his work requires very specialized (and expensive) computer programs.  But we have 1 year maternity/paternity leave where we will be paid 55% of our usual wages.  I fully intend on taking advantage of the full year (probably 6 months with me, 6 months with DH).  I can't imagine only having a few weeks!  How do you ladies do it?  It's going to be hard enough leaving a 6 month old! I don't know if I could do it!  You ladies rock.   

mrshutch

Thanks for the props- it's always helpful to hear For me, I couldn't imagine staying home. I always need to be doing something with my brain. Staying at home is also very hard work, but I really needed the interaction w/ adults and knowing that I was being productive during the day. I went back when DD was 3 mos. I was itching to get back, and all of the time I spend w/ DD before and after work is super special to me. It gets easier with time and more practice. Now I just don't know how the ladies with 2 or more do it!

AlisaS

It seems like just a few weeks but really it is fantastic. My guys have made such good friends with the other kids and the developmental stuff the did/do at daycare, even as infants is/was astounding.

Just different strokes. I can't imagine staying home without work for a year. I don't really see it as leaving my boys - we are all happy! Which, whatever you choose in terms of work vs. SAH, is all that matters.

MrsSledge

You just do what you have to do.  The first couple of days of daycare were hard, but they are good to her and she was young enough to not really know the difference.  For me, I was ready to get back to work and around adults again where I didn't need to think about what color her poop was and how long it had been since I bf, and which side. 

RubyRed7

I think it's hard for any mom to go back, regardless of how long it takes. That transition (which I just began) is the hardest! But being a working mom has its benefits and downsides, just like being a stay at home mom. We all just do the best we can

lisa777

I was put on bed rest so that took alot away from what I planned on taking for my maternity leave. I took just about 3 months off and it flew by for me. I dreaded going back to work and I think I cried everyday for about a week. I am very grateful that my parents are able to take care of DS because I can go through my day with no worries. If he was in a daycare, I know I wouldn't feel at ease. I would give anything to be a SAHM and I envy the women who have that luxury but my DH & I need both of our incomes unfortunately.

Maybride2

Eh.

I love my DS with all of my heart, but I was happy to get back to work after 3 months of being off.  I was happy to be socializing with my peers again.  It felt good to have a reason to take a shower and get dressed again.  My friend, who decided to be a SAHM, is miserable right now with her 5 month old.  But she says that since she's so fortunate to have the opportunity to SAHM, she needs to stuff her feelings and make do.  What a horrible, miserable existance that must be.

And my DS has absolutely flourished at daycare.  He's incredibly social, has lots of friends, and has learned way more than I could have taught him myself at home (I don't have a background in early childhood development, his caregivers at daycare do). 

Sure, I wish we had more time together every day - but I'm far from drowning in self-pity.

ali-1411

RubyRed7:

I think it's hard for any mom to go back, regardless of how long it takes. That transition (which I just began) is the hardest! But being a working mom has its benefits and downsides, just like being a stay at home mom. We all just do the best we can

lol - not always!  With DS I didn't go to work until he was 3 years old, and let me tell you I couldn't WAIT to drop him off at daycare some days

Its much easier during the toddler years.  And now that he's 6, he can't wait for me to go back to work after maternity leave because he misses his after-school daycare friends.

OhioUBride

I have 2 kids at the same daycare - we are very lucky b/c my DH has an onsite daycare at his office and it's a 10 min walk from my building. 

The first week was hard w/ my DD, but then when I had my son, I had 12 full weeks of one on one time w/ him and now he's 18 mos and RUNS into daycare every day - that's where his friends are.

I love my job and enjoy the professional development and adult interaction. I think my kids are very social, understand how to listen to other adults and are learning MUCH more than they would if they were home with me... some of the things my 3 1/2 year old is working on amazes me.

I think the best moms are the ones that are happy in their situation - whether it's a SAHM or a working mom.  I have friends who stay at home and are miserable and same with some working moms.

I'm very happy and I think my kids see that and react to a happy household...

alisonada

I think I would go crazy if I SAH for 6 months :-) No, I'm enjoying this time with my girls but it's been 8 weeks and I'm already looking forward to going back to work. I feel more balanced when I'm working and enjoy the mental stimulation and adult interaction. That said - I think it's GREAT that you have the option to take such a long maternity leave, because obviously not everyone feels like I do and some people would really prefer to have a longer time to SAH with their baby. SAH is HARD work, but different people handle it in different ways.

katie277s

Honestly, I did not want to go back after only 6 weeks, but we had no choice.  But looking back now, I am glad that he went to daycare, because now it is a breeze to drop him off at preschool and he has made lots of friends.  Also, it is nice to know that he is constantly learning new things, is active and is having fun.