2 yr old boy aggressive behavior

Babalonia

Hoping I can get some advice and make it through this post without crying. I don't know where he gets it and how he picked up his aggressive behavior. He's not in daycare and has no siblings but play with friends and cousins often around his age.  The best way u can describe it is that he literally does not know how to play with other kids..and it seems the issue is worse when he's one on one with a child and not in a group. His actions consist of "tackle hugging" pulling kids down, off of toys, hitting kids with toys, throwing toys, ramming toys (ex toy lawn mower) into other kids. Yesterday I was babysitting a friends little girl whom DS has been around (and yes we've had issues) and he bite her in the shoulder after pulling her down. 

we do time out, I'm always there stepping in, I praise him when I see him play nice. I read and read and talked to his pedi and I feel like I'm doing everything by the book. He's a sweet boy who does crazy things. Now is this EVERY time..no, but it's often enough where it's realit upsetting me. I don't know if I need to put him in a day care a few hours a week to get him around more kids consistently? I hate hearing "he's a boy, he's 2, he'll grow out if it." I just want him to learn what is appropriate. Any advice would be appreciated.  He turned 2 in May. 

XCrissCrossX

I read this book. Boys are aggressive. You need to give him an outlet for using that aggression and ways he can be aggressive that are socially acceptable. Get him those bopping gloves and "box" with him, let him throw balls and beat up his toys with pillows. Give him lots of time to run around. Teach him not to touch other kids. Do you wrestle on the floor with him and have tickle fights? 

pitterpatter129

Babalonia:

Hoping I can get some advice and make it through this post without crying. I don't know where he gets it and how he picked up his aggressive behavior. He's not in daycare and has no siblings but play with friends and cousins often around his age.  The best way u can describe it is that he literally does not know how to play

This could be some of it.  Maybe increase the amount of time around other kids.  Daycare/preschool is very structured too.  There is a daily schedule and planned activities.  Even free play is divided into play centers with small groups of kids and clear rules about how to use each center.  Maybe work on some structured play with other kids until he gets the hang of it.  --Practice with a toy with just you at home, remind him of the rules before playing with another kid, have out that toy in the same setting and sit with both kids while playing to model behavior --

And, he's 2! He really will grow out of it!

 

AZ123

Here are my suggestions being a mom of two boys. At that age, you just have to highly monitor them and try to intercept before the action takes place. Like if you see him going for a bite, you stop it. I do agree in that putting him in a daycare setting might help. The teachers are so experienced and they'll work with him.  Exhausting boys helps by taking them to the playground to run around but then if they're tired and cranky they tend to do naughty things more. 

Also, when you tell him "no" always say "no" and then the command/action. Such as "No hitting." get down on his level and look him in the eye but also physically touch him by putting your hand on his shoulder or what I do is hold my 2 year olds hand.

Babalonia

Thank you for your suggestions!!

XCrissCrossX

AZ123:

Here are my suggestions being a mom of two boys. At that age, you just have to highly monitor them and try to intercept before the action takes place. Like if you see him going for a bite, you stop it. I do agree in that putting him in a daycare setting might help. The teachers are so experienced and they'll work with him.  Exhausting boys helps by taking them to the playground to run around but then if they're tired and cranky they tend to do naughty things more. 

Also, when you tell him "no" always say "no" and then the command/action. Such as "No hitting." get down on his level and look him in the eye but also physically touch him by putting your hand on his shoulder or what I do is hold my 2 year olds hand.

Early childhood experts actually advise against this. When you say "Don't hit" or "no hitting" the kids have a way of tuning out the "no" and only hearing the "hit"-- rather, they suggest you say "touch nice" or "walk slowly" or whatever behavior you want them to do. 

pitterpatter129

XcrisscrossX:

AZ123:

Here are my suggestions being a mom of two boys. At that age, you just have to highly monitor them and try to intercept before the action takes place. Like if you see him going for a bite, you stop it. I do agree in that putting him in a daycare setting might help. The teachers are so experienced and they'll work with him.  Exhausting boys helps by taking them to the playground to run around but then if they're tired and cranky they tend to do naughty things more. 

Also, when you tell him "no" always say "no" and then the command/action. Such as "No hitting." get down on his level and look him in the eye but also physically touch him by putting your hand on his shoulder or what I do is hold my 2 year olds hand.

Early childhood experts actually advise against this. When you say "Don't hit" or "no hitting" the kids have a way of tuning out the "no" and only hearing the "hit"-- rather, they suggest you say "touch nice" or "walk slowly" or whatever behavior you want them to do. 

I've heard this too. The most common at our house is "Food stays on the plate!"

I don't know with biting though...Keep your teeth to yourself?

 

smseltz80

Hi i am sorry you are going through a tough time. It is just that... a tough time- a phase. My son is now 5 and was an extreme biter!! We were almost kicked out of the daycare. I had him evaluated and sought help! He just stopped doing it one day. Around 2-2 1/2 it just stopped. He is the sweetest and lovable 5 year old. My daughter is now 2 and she is aggressive!! she also has bitten, but not to the extent that he did. She pushes and hits. She is in daycare and I know that is part of it.. but this is just the way they are. Most of the time she is adorable and sweet.  I am much more relaxed the second time around because I know it is age appropriate and this too shall pass. Just try to give consistent time outs or consequences. My son loved guitars and he would get it taken away for the afternoon if he bit.  Try to not lose your cool and become harsh or aggressive with them. this makes it worse and they are not learning how to handle their frustration. Good luck- I promise it does get easier.